Memoirs
Copyright@L.Hadley 2026
Updated Mon. 05 - Oct. - 2026 - please - go to chapter 203 - of the 16th Installment.
Work of fiction. Any similarity to real people - dead or alive - or any real circumstances - purely coincidental.
The new segment appears - every Monday - Wednesday and Friday - of each week.
Chapter 68
That early spring morning when Roberto walked into my deli/bakery seemed special in some way. When I first spoke to him nothing out of ordinary happened - he bought a couple of blueberry muffins - took a bite of one and commented that they tasted super good - then he left but I kept thinking about him all day long and wondered if I will ever encounter him again.
He was a good looking guy in this early thirties - late twenties - with the typical Latin American features - thick, shiny black hair - brown eyes - muscular frame of medium proportions. I forgot about him for a while until my intense Spanish classes started a month later at the Berlitz School of Languages which offers short courses emphasizing business conversations.
After Jack and I took a beautiful vacation to Mexico for ten days in the lovely, new resort of Ixtapa - both of us became interested in Mexico with its rich history and traditions. I decided to learn Spanish in a short time - so Berlitz School Languages of was my choice since they offered fast moving courses which emphasized conversation skills.
When I walked into my weekly evening class - Roberto arrived as a teacher. This time - he was in charge while I was on the "other end." Then some most mysterious stuff started happening - some magic took place. My heart started to beat an extra beat all through the two hour lecture in which Roberto was explaining how the course works, the goals for the next ten weeks and the work required in terms of preparation during the week - in order to keep up with the fast pace of the weekly classes.
During the break at the end of the first hour - he came up to me with an arrogant but charming smile of the "undefeated youth".
"It's very good to see you again. I will have to stop in your deli/bakery again to get me some more of your scrumptious muffins,"
"It's always good to hear that you like our products and - so far - I like your 'product' as well. I am prepared to 'dig in'
and study my weekly assignments - as if there was 'no tomorrow'".
"You will speak Spanish in no time."
The following morning - Roberto walked into my business right after I got everything ready just when my morning opening routine was done. I was happy to see him, and it was hard for me to hide my feelings, but I am sure that he could read me like an open book.
After we sat at the window counter of my deli/bakery - I looked out the window to observe some young neighbors going to work a bit later since it was after ten a.m. The world suddenly appeared different to me. I felt like a different person - the way I was when I was much younger - full of dreams before the passing time - dulled them. Roberto seemed to notice everything about everything.
The jazz which I played over my sound system sounded mellow and out of ordinary. I wanted to hold this moment - but the time was going fast.
"Well, it was really nice to have your good coffee and your super muffin. Thanks," Roberto got up to leave. He smiled his "signature" smile. I wanted to shake his hand or give him a brief, friendly hug but decided not to.
Suddenly Jack walked quickly into the bakery which was unusual since he normally - worked the morning shift at his regular job.
"Hey - Jack - this is my Spanish instructor - Roberto Mendez. He is a good teacher."
After Jack and I took a beautiful vacation to Mexico for ten days in the lovely, new resort of Ixtapa - both of us became interested in Mexico with its rich history and traditions. I decided to learn Spanish in a short time - so Berlitz School Languages of was my choice since they offered fast moving courses which emphasized conversation skills.
When I walked into my weekly evening class - Roberto arrived as a teacher. This time - he was in charge while I was on the "other end." Then some most mysterious stuff started happening - some magic took place. My heart started to beat an extra beat all through the two hour lecture in which Roberto was explaining how the course works, the goals for the next ten weeks and the work required in terms of preparation during the week - in order to keep up with the fast pace of the weekly classes.
During the break at the end of the first hour - he came up to me with an arrogant but charming smile of the "undefeated youth".
"It's very good to see you again. I will have to stop in your deli/bakery again to get me some more of your scrumptious muffins,"
"It's always good to hear that you like our products and - so far - I like your 'product' as well. I am prepared to 'dig in'
and study my weekly assignments - as if there was 'no tomorrow'".
"You will speak Spanish in no time."
The following morning - Roberto walked into my business right after I got everything ready just when my morning opening routine was done. I was happy to see him, and it was hard for me to hide my feelings, but I am sure that he could read me like an open book.
After we sat at the window counter of my deli/bakery - I looked out the window to observe some young neighbors going to work a bit later since it was after ten a.m. The world suddenly appeared different to me. I felt like a different person - the way I was when I was much younger - full of dreams before the passing time - dulled them. Roberto seemed to notice everything about everything.
The jazz which I played over my sound system sounded mellow and out of ordinary. I wanted to hold this moment - but the time was going fast.
"Well, it was really nice to have your good coffee and your super muffin. Thanks," Roberto got up to leave. He smiled his "signature" smile. I wanted to shake his hand or give him a brief, friendly hug but decided not to.
Suddenly Jack walked quickly into the bakery which was unusual since he normally - worked the morning shift at his regular job.
"Hey - Jack - this is my Spanish instructor - Roberto Mendez. He is a good teacher."
They shook hands and smiled at each other.
"Very nice to meet you. We just spent a great vacation in Mexico. I assume that you know something about it."
"Yes - most of my family still lives in Durango - its a well known hilly city - that's where they used to make a lot of Westerns."
They spoke for a few minutes then Roberto left. Jack and I looked at each other with a new feeling between us.
"He is a good looking youngster. You are not thinking about any 'closer friendships' with him - are you?"
"Are you jealous?"
"Maybe."
"Then why don't you try to exercise and diet a bit to loose your 'spare tire' and start to live as if the world is more than just your job and your job buddies."
"What about my 'job buddies' - don't I come to help you when you need my help in the business?"
"You do - but you complain about it a lot."
* * *
I studied my Spanish vocabulary and phrases every night - before my weekly Spanish sessions with Roberto. A lot of people dropped out of that class. Evidently they didn't realize that it was a lot of work - to start speaking a foreign language.
Every week - I saw a slightly different version of Roberto. My progress in my conversational Spanish was encouraging to me and to Roberto.
"Very nice to meet you. We just spent a great vacation in Mexico. I assume that you know something about it."
"Yes - most of my family still lives in Durango - its a well known hilly city - that's where they used to make a lot of Westerns."
They spoke for a few minutes then Roberto left. Jack and I looked at each other with a new feeling between us.
"He is a good looking youngster. You are not thinking about any 'closer friendships' with him - are you?"
"Are you jealous?"
"Maybe."
"Then why don't you try to exercise and diet a bit to loose your 'spare tire' and start to live as if the world is more than just your job and your job buddies."
"What about my 'job buddies' - don't I come to help you when you need my help in the business?"
"You do - but you complain about it a lot."
* * *
I studied my Spanish vocabulary and phrases every night - before my weekly Spanish sessions with Roberto. A lot of people dropped out of that class. Evidently they didn't realize that it was a lot of work - to start speaking a foreign language.
Every week - I saw a slightly different version of Roberto. My progress in my conversational Spanish was encouraging to me and to Roberto.
Sometimes Roberto spoke at length and fast - in Spanish - to another instructor named Mercedes who also taught Spanish. She acted "flirty" around interesting looking men who took Spanish as if she was looking for a boyfriend; she was always nicely dressed and appeared hard driving, intense - with the fiery dark eyes darting around; her good looks stood out but she was not overly friendly to other women - maybe considering them jealous of her shiny black hair and muscular body which made her clothes look exquisite.
During our only session with her which she led one time - when Roberto got tied up in his day job - as a computer programmer.
During our only session with her which she led one time - when Roberto got tied up in his day job - as a computer programmer.
Mercedes tried to impress the students with her Madrid, Spain version of Spanish. She emphasized the fact that the Madrid version of Spanish inserts a lisp sound into the pronunciation of the letter "s" - due to a past speech impediments of one of the past Spanish monarchs.
That same night after class - Roberto materialized at the end of the session which ended around 11 pm. He spoke briefly to Mercedes - but I wasn't close enough to make out what they said - however - it appeared to me that their plans for the rest of the night - changed. As all of us were going down in the elevator - Mercedes and one of the students - a Scandinavian looking, handsome guy were carrying on an easy conversation - clearly indicating that they were headed to her place for a "night Capp" and some other possibilities. I caught this brief look of pain mixed with disgust in Roberto's eyes - as if he heard the nails scraping the glass. It was a brief expression in his eyes - before he started his - usual - easy and relaxed conversation with me - about nothing.
That same night after class - Roberto materialized at the end of the session which ended around 11 pm. He spoke briefly to Mercedes - but I wasn't close enough to make out what they said - however - it appeared to me that their plans for the rest of the night - changed. As all of us were going down in the elevator - Mercedes and one of the students - a Scandinavian looking, handsome guy were carrying on an easy conversation - clearly indicating that they were headed to her place for a "night Capp" and some other possibilities. I caught this brief look of pain mixed with disgust in Roberto's eyes - as if he heard the nails scraping the glass. It was a brief expression in his eyes - before he started his - usual - easy and relaxed conversation with me - about nothing.
It crossed my mind that maybe Roberto and Mercedes have an easy - "friends with benefits" - relationship going.
* * *
Right at the beginning of my second - ten week session with Roberto - Jack had a two week work assignment so he was gone - out of town, out of state. On the Friday when Jack left town - Roberto stopped in my deli/bakery in the morning the way he did once in a while. I knew that he was attracted to me but being honest and honorable - or so I thought - he didn't proposition me outright or anything like that but instead - he suggested that "we will be close friends - just friends". Fat chance - with all that special energy between him and me - which could almost be "cut with the knife."
"Good morning - happy weekend to you," Roberto said with his charming smile which always melted me inside as he hugged me after he walked into my deli/bakery on a Friday when Jack left town for several weeks on his job assignment.
* * *
Right at the beginning of my second - ten week session with Roberto - Jack had a two week work assignment so he was gone - out of town, out of state. On the Friday when Jack left town - Roberto stopped in my deli/bakery in the morning the way he did once in a while. I knew that he was attracted to me but being honest and honorable - or so I thought - he didn't proposition me outright or anything like that but instead - he suggested that "we will be close friends - just friends". Fat chance - with all that special energy between him and me - which could almost be "cut with the knife."
"Good morning - happy weekend to you," Roberto said with his charming smile which always melted me inside as he hugged me after he walked into my deli/bakery on a Friday when Jack left town for several weeks on his job assignment.
Roberto always smelled of Ralph Lauren cologne and he always looked great - glowing with his youthful energy. Since Roberto was familiar with my deli/bakery's schedule - he liked to stop by early - right after I opened - before it got busy around lunch time.
Our deli/bakery was decorated in warm colors of gray and wine colors with light commercial furniture which left a lot of space. It always smelled of freshly baked goodies. Our big, gorgeous looking and tasting muffins were the "stars" of our productions. Jack helped me to develop a lot of beautiful products since he worked for a famous chef while in high school.
"You and your husband have plans for the weekend?"
Sometimes the three of us would go out to a new Mexican restaurant - hundreds of which opened and closed in Chicago - on a regular basis. We usually talked about Mexico which Roberto loved and wanted to go back there to live after he retired from his job in the U.S.
"Jack left for several weeks on assignment - he will be back in a few weeks,"
"Well, there is this new restaurant - just opened - has a good Latin band, good food - a friend and I are going tomorrow night. You can come with us," his pronounced Spanish accent sounded charming to me - when he spoke his very correct English. It did sound good.
"You and your husband have plans for the weekend?"
Sometimes the three of us would go out to a new Mexican restaurant - hundreds of which opened and closed in Chicago - on a regular basis. We usually talked about Mexico which Roberto loved and wanted to go back there to live after he retired from his job in the U.S.
"Jack left for several weeks on assignment - he will be back in a few weeks,"
"Well, there is this new restaurant - just opened - has a good Latin band, good food - a friend and I are going tomorrow night. You can come with us," his pronounced Spanish accent sounded charming to me - when he spoke his very correct English. It did sound good.
Most people have a good sounding foreign accent when they speak English - especially the people with decent education. However - some foreigners speaking English with an accent - which sounds awful like "nails dragged across the chalkboard". Chicago has tons of foreigners of every kind.
"That friend which is going - is it Mercedes?"
"No, it's a guy - a body of mine. Are you thinking about a possibility that I might be sleeping with Mercedes?"
"Why should I care?"
"I think - you do."
"You might be wrong in your vast, far reaching - assumptions. What makes you think that you're such a big expert on women?"
"I will pick you up from here - at seven - tomorrow night - OK?"
"It looks okay now - if something comes up - I will leave you a message."
* * *
For the rest of that Friday and all morning and the rest of the day Saturday I wanted to speed up the time. I couldn't wait to see Roberto again. This energy was a big high which made me upset since I didn't want to loose control of the situation. I told Jack Friday evening when he called me - that I will go out with Roberto and his friend. I knew that someone would see me - it's a small world - so it's better that Jack would know ahead of time.
"I know that you have your stupid crush on this kid - it's written all over you - so go out with his friends and have fun with them - get it out of your system - but don't dance with him and don't do anything stupid," Jack laughed and suddenly everything changed back into a "light" and easy friendship the kind which comes and goes - nobody gets hurt so the friendship can last a long time - and hopefully - none of the clever but small demons - will be able to - undermine it.
"That friend which is going - is it Mercedes?"
"No, it's a guy - a body of mine. Are you thinking about a possibility that I might be sleeping with Mercedes?"
"Why should I care?"
"I think - you do."
"You might be wrong in your vast, far reaching - assumptions. What makes you think that you're such a big expert on women?"
"I will pick you up from here - at seven - tomorrow night - OK?"
"It looks okay now - if something comes up - I will leave you a message."
* * *
For the rest of that Friday and all morning and the rest of the day Saturday I wanted to speed up the time. I couldn't wait to see Roberto again. This energy was a big high which made me upset since I didn't want to loose control of the situation. I told Jack Friday evening when he called me - that I will go out with Roberto and his friend. I knew that someone would see me - it's a small world - so it's better that Jack would know ahead of time.
"I know that you have your stupid crush on this kid - it's written all over you - so go out with his friends and have fun with them - get it out of your system - but don't dance with him and don't do anything stupid," Jack laughed and suddenly everything changed back into a "light" and easy friendship the kind which comes and goes - nobody gets hurt so the friendship can last a long time - and hopefully - none of the clever but small demons - will be able to - undermine it.
I was sure that our "friendship" didn't mean nearly as much to Roberto as it meant to me.
"You look really nice," said Roberto as I got into his small Volkswagen that memorable Saturday evening. I wore a silk summer dress - covered with flowery designs of soft, summery colors - of wine and olive green - so my lipstick matched the wine color, but my eyes reflected the green hue from my lovely summer dress.
"You look really nice," said Roberto as I got into his small Volkswagen that memorable Saturday evening. I wore a silk summer dress - covered with flowery designs of soft, summery colors - of wine and olive green - so my lipstick matched the wine color, but my eyes reflected the green hue from my lovely summer dress.
He was normally not generous at all with his complements. I rarely knew what he was thinking even though he could read me like an open book - or so he thought.
Roberto brought along his neighbors - a young couple who lived next door. She was a quiet type, a pretty and smart Mexican girl who was born in the U.S., but her parents kept up with the rich Mexican traditions - the way tons of the second-generation Latin people did in Chicago.
Roberto brought along his neighbors - a young couple who lived next door. She was a quiet type, a pretty and smart Mexican girl who was born in the U.S., but her parents kept up with the rich Mexican traditions - the way tons of the second-generation Latin people did in Chicago.
Her young husband was strictly Anglo-American type - not overly intelligent - ran his mouths a lot, wanted to be in the center of attention all the time, wasn't very smart and it showed. He asked me a lot of questions which were none of his business which I evaded without offending him. While I was not rude to him - I to put him "in his place"; he got the message and stopped getting on my nerves. I knew how to do it and not come off as "abrasive".
Evidently Roberto and John got to be fairly close friends since both of them showed me how the Latin people drink their straight Tequila shots with the tops of their hands by the thumb covered with some coarse salt - which they licked - before downing their straight shots - which tasted even more awful - with salt.
John's wife and I - sipped our big standard Margueritas and laughed. Our drinks went well with the delicious Taco salads which were served - beautifully presented inside a crisp shell made of thin dough. I had a great time all evening.
Evidently Roberto and John got to be fairly close friends since both of them showed me how the Latin people drink their straight Tequila shots with the tops of their hands by the thumb covered with some coarse salt - which they licked - before downing their straight shots - which tasted even more awful - with salt.
John's wife and I - sipped our big standard Margueritas and laughed. Our drinks went well with the delicious Taco salads which were served - beautifully presented inside a crisp shell made of thin dough. I had a great time all evening.
There was tons of magic in the air. The band sounded terrific. Roberto and I spoke alone - first time that evening - when John and his wife went to the dance floor. He didn't dance well at all since he tried to show off himself rather than his wife. The band played a beautiful Latin classic "Quizzas, Quizzas, Quizzas" - set to the slow bolero which works better than when it is set to Cha-Cha beat.
"You look really nice tonight. Are you having a good time?" Said Roberto with his lips close to my ear since there was noise inside the venue. I could feel the touch of his lips to the top of my ear.
"You smell really good - it's good perfume you are wearing."
"I know that. I am having a good time - but I would have even better time if your friend didn't talk so much - most of it - bullshit."
"Just ignore him. He doesn't mean any harm - he just 'flaps his trap' all the time. He doesn't hear himself,"
"I know, I know the type."
John and his wife came back to the table and he asked like an idiot why Roberto and I didn't dance.
"You go ahead and dance for the two of us. I said and added, "you dance well," which was not true - that's why Roberto and I laughed.
"You look really nice tonight. Are you having a good time?" Said Roberto with his lips close to my ear since there was noise inside the venue. I could feel the touch of his lips to the top of my ear.
"You smell really good - it's good perfume you are wearing."
"I know that. I am having a good time - but I would have even better time if your friend didn't talk so much - most of it - bullshit."
"Just ignore him. He doesn't mean any harm - he just 'flaps his trap' all the time. He doesn't hear himself,"
"I know, I know the type."
John and his wife came back to the table and he asked like an idiot why Roberto and I didn't dance.
"You go ahead and dance for the two of us. I said and added, "you dance well," which was not true - that's why Roberto and I laughed.
Both of us made a comment before John and his wife came back to the table - that a lot of the stupid layers of the personality of the person - come out when they get onto the dance floor. John's dance moves pointed to his narcistic and stupid personality traits.
Roberto was a smooth and a classy dancer - I saw him dance nicely with a cute girl - on another occasion. He led his partner well and didn't show off too much on the dance floor - trying to make his partner look good.
The magic continued that night as if the events have already decided what was going to happen. I wanted to slow down the time, but it was going fast. It was a lovely late night during the late spring when the feeling of coming summer was already in the air.
We dropped off John and his wife after we left the restaurant - then Roberto drove through the night streets of Chicago. I kept glancing at him; both of us were slightly high on the beautiful night and some drinks I had at the restaurant; he appeared confident and happy even though he didn't drink since he was driving.
The magic continued that night as if the events have already decided what was going to happen. I wanted to slow down the time, but it was going fast. It was a lovely late night during the late spring when the feeling of coming summer was already in the air.
We dropped off John and his wife after we left the restaurant - then Roberto drove through the night streets of Chicago. I kept glancing at him; both of us were slightly high on the beautiful night and some drinks I had at the restaurant; he appeared confident and happy even though he didn't drink since he was driving.
A lot of his youthful energy was rubbing off on me. The city looked glorious - I felt a part of its grandeur. After we stopped slowly in front of my Chicago townhouse - I was suddenly transformed into the times when I was dating while studying at Ohio State University - before I met Jack. The late-night air felt intoxicating. The coming summer promised to be a lot of fun.
"Are you telling Jack that you had a good time tonight?"
"How about you? Did you enjoy yourself?"
"I am always happy when I am around you."
I thought to myself that "talk is cheap".
When we stopped in front of my townhouse Roberto asked if he could stop in for a few minutes only - I wouldn't have to worry - he would behave like a gentleman since he respected Jack and valued Jack's friendship. Roberto always appeared in control of the situation - guarded in some way. It was obvious that his life goals - were most important to him - clearly on his mind. He seemed more relaxed that night - though; I wanted for this night to last forever.
"You will stop in another time. I can't wait for the coming summer. Chicago summers are glorious every year."
I was easily drifting to sleep later that night - thinking about the fun events of that evening and looking forward to seeing Roberto again soon. My bedroom felt extra good - the whole world appeared new and promising. I noticed that my nicely decorated, spacious bedroom made me feel comfortable without Jack. My three cats - fluffy, cuddly and clean - since they didn't go outside - came softly to sit on the top of my new queen size bed cover - by my feet - the way they did every night. All of them purred happily as I was easily falling asleep. In spite of budding problems with Jack and with my business - it was a great time of my life, but the best part came later.
* * *
Chapter 69
That summer which was beautiful - went fast - and so did the three seasons which followed - with mine and Roberto's friendship entering the new phase as if it moved by itself. The following summer Jack and I decided to close the business since it wasn't profitable enough to compensate Jack and me for our hard work and constant worry - typical in running the deli/bakery type of business.
One morning towards the end of this glorious summer which I call "Roberto's summer" - Jack and I were fixing our breakfast before he got on the way to his job which he loved but which was about to undergo some major changes; he and I were having our breakfast on our small patio full of flowers - fenced in - so the neighbors had to stand on a small step ladder to talk to us. Jack made delicious buttermilk pancakes - fluffy and light. We ground the coffee beans before we brewed it - so it smelled and tasted heavenly. I put some honey and banana slices on my short pancakes' stack - while Jack spread his stack with butter in between them - then he squeezed yellow/gold honey from the bear shaped container. He did lose some weight - though - following my suggestion from the previous year.
"You have been having your fun with Roberto visiting here and the three of us doing fun things - but I think that we need to 'cool' it with him for a while,"
"I admit - it's been tons of fun with him but you are jealous for no reason,"
"It's not exactly true. You have some fantasies that he is in love with you - which I doubt. I saw him several times with this Spanish looking, sexy woman - recently and before - they didn't see me - but they were all 'rub a dab dub' together."
"So what? What do I care?"
"I think you do. It will be better if we cool it with him for a while."
Jack was serious about his "suggestion" to distance ourselves from Roberto since Jack mentioned to me before that his work buddies were inquiring - as if it was any of their damn business - whether Roberto had a girlfriend since he never brought Mercedes with him. I thought that she was involved with another man while she and Roberto were "just friends".
"Are you telling Jack that you had a good time tonight?"
"How about you? Did you enjoy yourself?"
"I am always happy when I am around you."
I thought to myself that "talk is cheap".
When we stopped in front of my townhouse Roberto asked if he could stop in for a few minutes only - I wouldn't have to worry - he would behave like a gentleman since he respected Jack and valued Jack's friendship. Roberto always appeared in control of the situation - guarded in some way. It was obvious that his life goals - were most important to him - clearly on his mind. He seemed more relaxed that night - though; I wanted for this night to last forever.
"You will stop in another time. I can't wait for the coming summer. Chicago summers are glorious every year."
I was easily drifting to sleep later that night - thinking about the fun events of that evening and looking forward to seeing Roberto again soon. My bedroom felt extra good - the whole world appeared new and promising. I noticed that my nicely decorated, spacious bedroom made me feel comfortable without Jack. My three cats - fluffy, cuddly and clean - since they didn't go outside - came softly to sit on the top of my new queen size bed cover - by my feet - the way they did every night. All of them purred happily as I was easily falling asleep. In spite of budding problems with Jack and with my business - it was a great time of my life, but the best part came later.
* * *
Chapter 69
That summer which was beautiful - went fast - and so did the three seasons which followed - with mine and Roberto's friendship entering the new phase as if it moved by itself. The following summer Jack and I decided to close the business since it wasn't profitable enough to compensate Jack and me for our hard work and constant worry - typical in running the deli/bakery type of business.
One morning towards the end of this glorious summer which I call "Roberto's summer" - Jack and I were fixing our breakfast before he got on the way to his job which he loved but which was about to undergo some major changes; he and I were having our breakfast on our small patio full of flowers - fenced in - so the neighbors had to stand on a small step ladder to talk to us. Jack made delicious buttermilk pancakes - fluffy and light. We ground the coffee beans before we brewed it - so it smelled and tasted heavenly. I put some honey and banana slices on my short pancakes' stack - while Jack spread his stack with butter in between them - then he squeezed yellow/gold honey from the bear shaped container. He did lose some weight - though - following my suggestion from the previous year.
"You have been having your fun with Roberto visiting here and the three of us doing fun things - but I think that we need to 'cool' it with him for a while,"
"I admit - it's been tons of fun with him but you are jealous for no reason,"
"It's not exactly true. You have some fantasies that he is in love with you - which I doubt. I saw him several times with this Spanish looking, sexy woman - recently and before - they didn't see me - but they were all 'rub a dab dub' together."
"So what? What do I care?"
"I think you do. It will be better if we cool it with him for a while."
Jack was serious about his "suggestion" to distance ourselves from Roberto since Jack mentioned to me before that his work buddies were inquiring - as if it was any of their damn business - whether Roberto had a girlfriend since he never brought Mercedes with him. I thought that she was involved with another man while she and Roberto were "just friends".
I guess people who saw the three of us speculated about the possibilities of any "illicit" - potential combinations between the three of us.
I decided to talk to Roberto rather soon - to have it behind me. I always know that all the good times come to an end - thus it's good to be prepared to find new good times. I know that there are many important energies in my life even if there are some sad times in between.
I decided to talk to Roberto rather soon - to have it behind me. I always know that all the good times come to an end - thus it's good to be prepared to find new good times. I know that there are many important energies in my life even if there are some sad times in between.
Jack and mine problems became deeper after Jack's employer changed his work status to an independent contractor - which greatly upset Jack for a lot of reasons; we lost the health benefits provided by the company so the pricey - COBRA - coverage for ex-employees - had to do for a while. There were other - small but persistent demons - pulling on Jack and mine - union.
"Remember - if you ever want to see me or want to talk to me - just call - I will be there," said Roberto with a sad expression on his face.
"Thank you. It means a lot to me that you say it - I appreciate it."
"I hope that you and Jack can work it out. I don't want to be in your way."
"You are always in control and land on 'four paws' like a cat. There are plenty of friends for you out there - one way or another."
"Things don't always go smoothly for me - life can be rough at times. Mercedes and I lived together several years ago - but we decided to go our separate ways after she made a decision to get an abortion. Her seven year old son from her first marriage takes up a lot of her energies. Now - we are just friends."
"This 'just friends' mantra gets you into some good places - no doubt."
"I didn't do anything dishonest to you and Jack. On the contrary - several times - if I only told you that I loved you - I would have you in bed."
"Not so fast. I would know that you would be lying - since it's obvious that you are still in love with Mercedes even if she - evidently - has some other prospects in her bedroom."
"That must bother you - if its any of your business - anyway."
"It's possible to have feelings for more than one woman," he added as if to soften his rude tone of voice - a second before. "You know that you are a very attractive and interesting woman. I am sure that most men you meet are attracted to you."
"Remember - if you ever want to see me or want to talk to me - just call - I will be there," said Roberto with a sad expression on his face.
"Thank you. It means a lot to me that you say it - I appreciate it."
"I hope that you and Jack can work it out. I don't want to be in your way."
"You are always in control and land on 'four paws' like a cat. There are plenty of friends for you out there - one way or another."
"Things don't always go smoothly for me - life can be rough at times. Mercedes and I lived together several years ago - but we decided to go our separate ways after she made a decision to get an abortion. Her seven year old son from her first marriage takes up a lot of her energies. Now - we are just friends."
"This 'just friends' mantra gets you into some good places - no doubt."
"I didn't do anything dishonest to you and Jack. On the contrary - several times - if I only told you that I loved you - I would have you in bed."
"Not so fast. I would know that you would be lying - since it's obvious that you are still in love with Mercedes even if she - evidently - has some other prospects in her bedroom."
"That must bother you - if its any of your business - anyway."
"It's possible to have feelings for more than one woman," he added as if to soften his rude tone of voice - a second before. "You know that you are a very attractive and interesting woman. I am sure that most men you meet are attracted to you."
"You're right about that. Let's just say 'goodbye' for now and think of all the fun times we had. Nothing is forever - especially if it's fun."
* * *
A few weeks later I was talking on the phone with my older brother Max who was always generous with his advice regarding my life - whether it was solicited or not. This time - though - I called him wanting to talk to him about a lot of private matters which I would not necessarily share with anybody else unless it was a close friend.
"Jack has been acting goofy lately. His job situation has been bothering him a lot - among other things that constantly get on his nerves. He has never been that way - before. We closed the business - I have had some promising job interviews but I miss my deli/bakery like crazy. Roberto has been on my mind a lot - I miss him a lot - too. Things just seem bleak now."
* * *
A few weeks later I was talking on the phone with my older brother Max who was always generous with his advice regarding my life - whether it was solicited or not. This time - though - I called him wanting to talk to him about a lot of private matters which I would not necessarily share with anybody else unless it was a close friend.
"Jack has been acting goofy lately. His job situation has been bothering him a lot - among other things that constantly get on his nerves. He has never been that way - before. We closed the business - I have had some promising job interviews but I miss my deli/bakery like crazy. Roberto has been on my mind a lot - I miss him a lot - too. Things just seem bleak now."
"First of all - forget about that kid for now - he is only messing up your marriage. If Jack and you can't work things out - it's not the end of the world - you are only forty - attractive and smart and on top of things. Our mother said many times that your mate shouldn't be 'an alpha' and 'omega' of our existence - to the exclusion of anything else."
"You must know a lot about those matters since you have been married three times."
"Its not easy to be in a long term relationship - time always starts grinding on it one way or another - especially if you don't have children."
"Go out dancing to your ballroom studio," added Max after a short pause, "try to make a go of your marriage - but if it doesn't work - you can't perform the miracles - it doesn't work. If Jack leaves - then you can call your Latin friend - but don't get too emotionally involved with him or anybody else. Just have fun for today - the right kind of fun - tomorrow is not promised."
After I finished talking to Max - I immediately started to feel better about everything. After all - it was fun with Roberto for over a year - and that's a long time. All my life I always look for the positive aspects of the situations - when the sudden, unpleasant passages arrive in life - which they invariably - come up - especially - after the fun times come to a stop.
Chapter 70
I frequently think about a lot of happy times during the summers in Poland where a group of us - childhood friends - were growing up. My closest childhood friend for many years - Lizotchka Levin was a pretty girl with dimples in her cheeks. Her big brown eyes smiled a lot. Even though I liked her a lot - sometimes I was jealous of her good looks - while she always looked up to me - since ever since we were little - I organized a group of kids as to what kinds of games we were to play - in what sequence - and things like that.
We were happy in Poland - our lives were good - for the most part - even if we were - always - planning to leave Poland for good. I have great memories of endlessly happy summers spent in several beautiful Polish mountain resorts. Lizotchka's family - usually - rented a summer villa down the street from our family's rental.
"You must know a lot about those matters since you have been married three times."
"Its not easy to be in a long term relationship - time always starts grinding on it one way or another - especially if you don't have children."
"Go out dancing to your ballroom studio," added Max after a short pause, "try to make a go of your marriage - but if it doesn't work - you can't perform the miracles - it doesn't work. If Jack leaves - then you can call your Latin friend - but don't get too emotionally involved with him or anybody else. Just have fun for today - the right kind of fun - tomorrow is not promised."
After I finished talking to Max - I immediately started to feel better about everything. After all - it was fun with Roberto for over a year - and that's a long time. All my life I always look for the positive aspects of the situations - when the sudden, unpleasant passages arrive in life - which they invariably - come up - especially - after the fun times come to a stop.
Chapter 70
I frequently think about a lot of happy times during the summers in Poland where a group of us - childhood friends - were growing up. My closest childhood friend for many years - Lizotchka Levin was a pretty girl with dimples in her cheeks. Her big brown eyes smiled a lot. Even though I liked her a lot - sometimes I was jealous of her good looks - while she always looked up to me - since ever since we were little - I organized a group of kids as to what kinds of games we were to play - in what sequence - and things like that.
We were happy in Poland - our lives were good - for the most part - even if we were - always - planning to leave Poland for good. I have great memories of endlessly happy summers spent in several beautiful Polish mountain resorts. Lizotchka's family - usually - rented a summer villa down the street from our family's rental.
The Polish owners of those residences moved out for the summers - into cramped quarters of their families for the whole summer so they could rent out their villas to the families like ours for the whole summer or a month of a summer. Those were well maintained, small family homes with rose bushes in front of them; one such lovely dwelling we rented out for three months of that memorable summer for June, July and August.
That particular Saturday in the early July stands out in my mind for several reasons. Our fathers came up from the city - for the weekends so the Saturday nights in the luscious, green, big park full of beautiful flowers - were always extra special and fun. All of us dressed up in fancy-schmantzy summer clothes and went to the park in the evening - after supper - for several hours; we were mingling with new friends; the adults insisted that we drink the local spring water - which tasted like Sulphur - but - supposedly - had all the wonderful, health-giving qualities.
The drinking center where the spring water was available was located in the middle of the park; the center had a fountain with the "miraculous" water running from the deep springs underground - from which the "miraculous' water was conducted by pipes ending with faucets through which people filled their fancy containers of elaborate designs. The group of us - kids - always found a way to dump this "miracles producing" spring water - discreetly - onto the flower beds.
The drinking center where the spring water was available was located in the middle of the park; the center had a fountain with the "miraculous" water running from the deep springs underground - from which the "miraculous' water was conducted by pipes ending with faucets through which people filled their fancy containers of elaborate designs. The group of us - kids - always found a way to dump this "miracles producing" spring water - discreetly - onto the flower beds.
On Saturday nights the orchestra played various popular tunes and they played much longer than during the week. The orchestra played more danceable rhythms since the couples danced the ballroom dances on the big dance platform in front of the orchestra - with my parents - usually - doing the best dance moves.
That memorable Saturday during the late morning - after mother fixed my breakfast consisting of freshly picked wild strawberries covered by sweet cream and two slices of tasty, dark, peasant style bread covered by a thick layer of yellow country butter - I ran out to meet my best friend Lizotchka - the same thing I did almost every morning that summer. It was a glorious summer day - sunny but not too hot - with the light breeze caressing the leaves. The birds sang their summer songs. Our mothers stayed home to cook supper for that night and for the next day. We had excellent, fresh food brought to our rental villa - every other day - by the local farmers.
My best friend and I went to the nearby woods almost every morning to pick some wild strawberries and blackberries which we ate for the following morning's breakfast. Lizotchka was waiting for me in front of her rental while her mother was doing the same thing my mother was doing - preparing some meals for later.
My best friend and I went to the nearby woods almost every morning to pick some wild strawberries and blackberries which we ate for the following morning's breakfast. Lizotchka was waiting for me in front of her rental while her mother was doing the same thing my mother was doing - preparing some meals for later.
My friend wore a pink, frilly summer dress while mine was of wine color. Both of us sported the same kind of sandals - of beige and brown design which were a total fashion craze for children that summer. Our hair was neatly braided into two braids with colorful bows tying the ends - usually matching our dresses in color. I was happy to see that her fat younger brother was not going with us to the woods since he always tattled and frequently - generously embellished his exaggerated "reports" to Lizotchka's mother about Lizotchka's and me using bad language or some silly stuff like that.
"Max is coming to be with mom and me - next week. They suddenly eliminated his summer camp," I informed Lizotchka about my older brother's arrival - as soon as we were a little bit away from Lizotchka's rental villa - well out of the earshot of her mother and her nosy little brother.
"Max is coming to be with mom and me - next week. They suddenly eliminated his summer camp," I informed Lizotchka about my older brother's arrival - as soon as we were a little bit away from Lizotchka's rental villa - well out of the earshot of her mother and her nosy little brother.
Her mother sent us some kisses before we left quickly. The radio played a beautiful Tango - a big hit that year - titled "Farewells" from the popular Polish movie by the same title. That movie dragged and never ended but that title song was fabulous. The famous vocalist - with her warm voice and masterful delivery - was cherished and beloved by the audiences for many, many years. I could listen to her forever.
"Are you happy about it?"
"No way. He is bossing me around and mom lets him do it - a lot."
"Cyril is not with us today. Isn't that good?"
"Not only it's good - but it's also wonderful. He always gets in the way - that little fat fart."
We were talking a happy talk about nothing as we walked towards the nearby, lush woods preceded by a green meadow. The wild strawberries and blackberries grew right at the end of the meadow - at the beginning of thick wood stalk. The wild strawberries and blackberries grew right at the end of the meadow - at the beginning of thick woods full of pine trees which smelled - of the warmed up by sun - pine needles; the happy scent of the summer.
"Are you happy about it?"
"No way. He is bossing me around and mom lets him do it - a lot."
"Cyril is not with us today. Isn't that good?"
"Not only it's good - but it's also wonderful. He always gets in the way - that little fat fart."
We were talking a happy talk about nothing as we walked towards the nearby, lush woods preceded by a green meadow. The wild strawberries and blackberries grew right at the end of the meadow - at the beginning of thick wood stalk. The wild strawberries and blackberries grew right at the end of the meadow - at the beginning of thick woods full of pine trees which smelled - of the warmed up by sun - pine needles; the happy scent of the summer.
We didn't venture into the thick forest ever since we got lost in the woods one time and barely found our way back. Lizotchka and I needed to fill one medium sized jar each of two kinds of fruits which tasted sweet and yummy; the wild strawberries and blackberries were most abundant. Occasionally we found some red raspberry plants, so we put the raspberries into our blackberry jars.
We tried not to eat the berries but when we started to get hungry a lot - we knew that it's time to go home for lunch usually consisting of baked chicken, summer salad and thick peasant bread slices covered with yellow butter.
* * *
We met again after supper around 7 pm; our families - including her and me - got all "decked up" in fancy summer clothes as we went to the park's festivities which lasted till midnight on Saturday nights. Our moms dabbed some fancy perfumes onto their wrists - the scent of which - always remind me of this wonderful summer.
When we got to the park the adults went towards the orchestra platform - fat little Cyril went with them - since my friend and I strongly discouraged him from tugging along with us and being in the way. Lizotchka and I started our weekly - Saturday night routine to look for the new people who came up during the week to vacation in this popular Polish mountain resort who showed up - for the first time - to the park on Saturdays - since it was the most fun night of the week.
She and I noticed the two newcomers - teenage boys - nicely dressed - who interested us - we noticed them earlier during that week - they were two teenage boys who stood out. Evidently, they were "buddies" since they - stuck together but didn't look like they would be related. They were good looking, fashionably dressed - glowed with good life, carried themselves with confidence.
We met again after supper around 7 pm; our families - including her and me - got all "decked up" in fancy summer clothes as we went to the park's festivities which lasted till midnight on Saturday nights. Our moms dabbed some fancy perfumes onto their wrists - the scent of which - always remind me of this wonderful summer.
When we got to the park the adults went towards the orchestra platform - fat little Cyril went with them - since my friend and I strongly discouraged him from tugging along with us and being in the way. Lizotchka and I started our weekly - Saturday night routine to look for the new people who came up during the week to vacation in this popular Polish mountain resort who showed up - for the first time - to the park on Saturdays - since it was the most fun night of the week.
She and I noticed the two newcomers - teenage boys - nicely dressed - who interested us - we noticed them earlier during that week - they were two teenage boys who stood out. Evidently, they were "buddies" since they - stuck together but didn't look like they would be related. They were good looking, fashionably dressed - glowed with good life, carried themselves with confidence.
We knew that the guys will be in the park during the nearest Saturday. Sure enough - Lizotchka and I noticed them standing not far from the dancing platform - as they looked around for new friends. She and I had to take steps - before some other party would do it.
"Go talk to them," said Lizotchka. "You are good at it - then come and get me - after you introduced yourself," she always said the same thing in similar circumstances.
She was shy around new people - while I always took my chances. It turned out that the new guys were from Warsaw which was the top status place to live - being the capital of the country. We lived in a big town as well - so Lizotchka and I - were on par with our new friends. Our town - Wroclaw - was the main center of the south-west part of Poland - Silesia which took turns in belonging to either Germany or Poland.
We were giggling as we talked to our new friends - time went fast - the evening smelled of honey suckle - there was magic in the air. After the orchestra started to play a classic Tango "LaCumparsita" - all four of us went up close to the dancing platform. I was hoping that my parents will stand out like almost every Saturday - however one never knows for sure until things happen. Many things could go wrong for a lot of reasons - but that night was magic. Everything was endless fun until the night ended at midnight.
* * *
Sometimes the years go by almost like a blink of an eye - but in other times - the days and the nights - drag like "molasses in January." After that summer full of joy - in the middle of the fall which followed - Lizotchka and her family left Poland for the United States. I missed her a lot - we corresponded. She sent me letters describing her new life in the United States - and in her American photos she stared at me with the bold look of a young American movie star. Then we lost touch for a while.
Long story - short - ten years went by from our memorable summer at the Polish mountain resort while my family and I came to the United States - ten years after Lizotchka and her family. I finished my last year of high school and started my first year at the huge campus of Ohio State University in Columbus, Ohio where we settled since our cousins who sponsored us - were the faculty members at O.S.U. Both of them - subsequently - transferred to Boston's - Brandeis University and we lost touch with them. Not that any of us cared too deeply to keep in close touch or anything like that. They looked down on any newcomers as if being born in the U.S. was such a big deal - entitlement. My parents got jobs as researchers for the huge Ohio State University library - all on their own - after the gigantic efforts - it was not easy for them to find suitable work.
Suddenly I get a phone call from Lizotchka since she found out that I was studying at Ohio State and as it turned out - she was also studying at O.S.U. - a year ahead of me. She needed a roommate for her newly rehabbed campus apartment for the coming summer quarter while I was looking to move in with some suitable party. I might have passed her on the big O.S.U. campus - maybe I thought briefly that some coed looks a bit like my childhood friend Lizotchka but I never expected her to study at the same university.
We re-connected at the perfect time since I didn't want to spend the summer with some - potential - idiots I didn't know. It was like a dream come true - we were going to be together - again - the whole summer - after our lives underwent lots of important changes.
We were giggling as we talked to our new friends - time went fast - the evening smelled of honey suckle - there was magic in the air. After the orchestra started to play a classic Tango "LaCumparsita" - all four of us went up close to the dancing platform. I was hoping that my parents will stand out like almost every Saturday - however one never knows for sure until things happen. Many things could go wrong for a lot of reasons - but that night was magic. Everything was endless fun until the night ended at midnight.
* * *
Sometimes the years go by almost like a blink of an eye - but in other times - the days and the nights - drag like "molasses in January." After that summer full of joy - in the middle of the fall which followed - Lizotchka and her family left Poland for the United States. I missed her a lot - we corresponded. She sent me letters describing her new life in the United States - and in her American photos she stared at me with the bold look of a young American movie star. Then we lost touch for a while.
Long story - short - ten years went by from our memorable summer at the Polish mountain resort while my family and I came to the United States - ten years after Lizotchka and her family. I finished my last year of high school and started my first year at the huge campus of Ohio State University in Columbus, Ohio where we settled since our cousins who sponsored us - were the faculty members at O.S.U. Both of them - subsequently - transferred to Boston's - Brandeis University and we lost touch with them. Not that any of us cared too deeply to keep in close touch or anything like that. They looked down on any newcomers as if being born in the U.S. was such a big deal - entitlement. My parents got jobs as researchers for the huge Ohio State University library - all on their own - after the gigantic efforts - it was not easy for them to find suitable work.
Suddenly I get a phone call from Lizotchka since she found out that I was studying at Ohio State and as it turned out - she was also studying at O.S.U. - a year ahead of me. She needed a roommate for her newly rehabbed campus apartment for the coming summer quarter while I was looking to move in with some suitable party. I might have passed her on the big O.S.U. campus - maybe I thought briefly that some coed looks a bit like my childhood friend Lizotchka but I never expected her to study at the same university.
We re-connected at the perfect time since I didn't want to spend the summer with some - potential - idiots I didn't know. It was like a dream come true - we were going to be together - again - the whole summer - after our lives underwent lots of important changes.
I couldn't wait to see her - again - after ten years went by - as I waited for her - all my stuff packed - in my current - old and somewhat dilapidated - O.S.U. campus apartment which I was extremely happy to unload. All the necessary moving arrangements were made over the phone thus she would help me to move in her re-habbed campus unit - using her small car. I was happy to be spending another summer - again - with Lizotchka. It promised to be a glorious summer.
* * *
It was a cool and lovely early summer afternoon. I saw through the blinds how she pulled in and parked her small Chevy across the street from my old O.S.U. campus apartment. I couldn't believe my eyes. Lizotchka looked tall, muscular and moved with utter confidence. Her long, thick hair was bleached blond while her fashionable summer clothes looked super good on her tanned body. I - suddenly - felt like a Cinderella scrubbing the floors before her big dance.
We hugged for a long moment, and I smelled her perfume "Shalimar" - which was a big craze of that summer.
"You look good - Maratchka - it's been ten long years," I wasn't sure if she meant it or just wanted to be nice.
"Not nearly as good as you look - you look like this movie star - Sandra Dee - maybe better."
My transistor played a big hit of that summer Frank Sinatra's "Strangers in the Night".
"I like when you call me 'Maratchka' - just like my family calls me - while the American version of my name is 'Maggie'".
"I am not 'Lizotchka' any more as well - in this country - only to my folks, my brother and to some close friend but the Americans quickly shortened my name to 'Lisa'".
We talked for a few hours after we moved my stuff to my new apartment which Lizotchka rented out - until the end of that summer. We filled each other in - on what was happening to us during the ten years. The evening quickly changed into the summer night. After eating the quick TV dinners - we sipped some white wine as we listened to easy jazz. I was still wondering how all that meeting after so many years apart - happened - as if it was meant to happen.
Only a month before that first night in my new apartment - I never thought I will be re-united with my childhood friend. Ten years is a long time to be apart. Both of us changed in a lot of ways. When I was falling asleep in my new, comfortable bed - in my new, fancy apartment - mine for the whole summer - I was thinking about the summer which just began - which promised to be exciting and fun.
* * *
* * *
It was a cool and lovely early summer afternoon. I saw through the blinds how she pulled in and parked her small Chevy across the street from my old O.S.U. campus apartment. I couldn't believe my eyes. Lizotchka looked tall, muscular and moved with utter confidence. Her long, thick hair was bleached blond while her fashionable summer clothes looked super good on her tanned body. I - suddenly - felt like a Cinderella scrubbing the floors before her big dance.
We hugged for a long moment, and I smelled her perfume "Shalimar" - which was a big craze of that summer.
"You look good - Maratchka - it's been ten long years," I wasn't sure if she meant it or just wanted to be nice.
"Not nearly as good as you look - you look like this movie star - Sandra Dee - maybe better."
My transistor played a big hit of that summer Frank Sinatra's "Strangers in the Night".
"I like when you call me 'Maratchka' - just like my family calls me - while the American version of my name is 'Maggie'".
"I am not 'Lizotchka' any more as well - in this country - only to my folks, my brother and to some close friend but the Americans quickly shortened my name to 'Lisa'".
We talked for a few hours after we moved my stuff to my new apartment which Lizotchka rented out - until the end of that summer. We filled each other in - on what was happening to us during the ten years. The evening quickly changed into the summer night. After eating the quick TV dinners - we sipped some white wine as we listened to easy jazz. I was still wondering how all that meeting after so many years apart - happened - as if it was meant to happen.
Only a month before that first night in my new apartment - I never thought I will be re-united with my childhood friend. Ten years is a long time to be apart. Both of us changed in a lot of ways. When I was falling asleep in my new, comfortable bed - in my new, fancy apartment - mine for the whole summer - I was thinking about the summer which just began - which promised to be exciting and fun.
* * *
A few weeks later - around the Fourth of July holiday - during that memorable summer - Lizotchka and I drove an hour and a half from Ohio State campus to visit her parents who lived in a medium size town close to Columbus, Ohio. They both worked decent jobs and owned a nice, clean ranch style home with a big back yard.
Her mother Ella was still nice looking with a few silver strands in her dark hair while her father looked as handsome as ever - the "salt and pepper" gray in his dark mane made him appear - distinguished.
"Maratchka - I can't believe how grown up you are. The last time I saw you - you were ten years old," her mother hugged me after Lizotchka and I walked into her parents' clean and nicely decorated - big ranch style home - in the late afternoon. Her mother smelled of the same perfume she liked when we lived in Poland. Their home had a clean scent - of good life and luxury. The soft, white carpet made me take off my tennis shoes.
I - immediately - felt like home at her parents' house. Her father came up closer to me - to greet me by embracing me briefly - after he started playing a hit of that summer - "Sunrise - Sunset" on the fancy turntable in the corner of their living room. "The Fiddler on the Roof" had a huge success on Broadway that summer.
We unpacked our weekend stuff in Lizotchka's old room which still had some of her dolls and stuffed animals. I went over to look at her younger brother's room with a bunk bed where I was to sleep. He was away studying pre-med in Chicago, but his photos showed a handsome, confident college guy - a big change from a fat little boy - I remembered - who always wanted to cling to me and his big sister.
After the evening spent on reminiscing "good old times" in Communist Poland - I fell asleep in a blink of an eye in Lizotchka's brother's bed. The next morning after I woke up earlier than my friend - I walked barefoot towards the kitchen which looked like someone has been there already. Then I heard some familiar Russian song which I heard in my childhood - coming from the finished basement of Lizotchka's parents' house.
Her mother Ella was still nice looking with a few silver strands in her dark hair while her father looked as handsome as ever - the "salt and pepper" gray in his dark mane made him appear - distinguished.
"Maratchka - I can't believe how grown up you are. The last time I saw you - you were ten years old," her mother hugged me after Lizotchka and I walked into her parents' clean and nicely decorated - big ranch style home - in the late afternoon. Her mother smelled of the same perfume she liked when we lived in Poland. Their home had a clean scent - of good life and luxury. The soft, white carpet made me take off my tennis shoes.
I - immediately - felt like home at her parents' house. Her father came up closer to me - to greet me by embracing me briefly - after he started playing a hit of that summer - "Sunrise - Sunset" on the fancy turntable in the corner of their living room. "The Fiddler on the Roof" had a huge success on Broadway that summer.
We unpacked our weekend stuff in Lizotchka's old room which still had some of her dolls and stuffed animals. I went over to look at her younger brother's room with a bunk bed where I was to sleep. He was away studying pre-med in Chicago, but his photos showed a handsome, confident college guy - a big change from a fat little boy - I remembered - who always wanted to cling to me and his big sister.
After the evening spent on reminiscing "good old times" in Communist Poland - I fell asleep in a blink of an eye in Lizotchka's brother's bed. The next morning after I woke up earlier than my friend - I walked barefoot towards the kitchen which looked like someone has been there already. Then I heard some familiar Russian song which I heard in my childhood - coming from the finished basement of Lizotchka's parents' house.
The internationally famous - Russian/Soviet chanteuse - Claudia Shulzhenko sang her old hit - loved by many women - "A Blue Scarf". It reminded me of my childhood in Poland since both - my mother and Lizotchka's mother - were from Soviet Russia thus we were familiar with many Russian singers popular in their day.
After I opened the doors leading down towards the finished basement which looked like a luxurious small apartment - I saw my friend's mother making a freshly squeezed orange juice for breakfast in the kitchen of the tiny basement unit. She emptied the juicer's glass top into a small glass which she handed to me.
"Thanks, Mrs. Levin", I said as I drank the freshly made juice which tasted great and smelled even better.
"It's a long way from the Communist Poland," I said.
"We had good lives there. We didn't know any better until we came to this country. Anyway - when one's young - it's good anywhere."
"Did you get a decent job right away?"
"Heavens - no. It was hard at the beginning. I didn't speak any English but Alex - even with his good job skills and good knowledge of English - couldn't get a job in his profession for quite some time. The agency kept sending him to do a lot of 'idiot' assignments before he finally got a decent, permanent position in his field."
"The same thing happened to my folks. It's hard at the long beginnings before things - finally - fall into their proper places. People think that once they come to the U.S. with some skills - they will be greeted with a 'red carpet and orchestra' welcome."
* * *
The following morning Lizotchka and I were soaking up some pleasant morning sun in the big back yard of her parents' house. The yard was covered with lush, green, grass - well maintained. Both of us sipped - freshly squeezed orange juice as we were laughing the youthful laugh of the carefree - summer.
"Your engagement ring will cause sensation when the regular session starts at the University," I said and looked again at the decent size diamond shining against her tanned hand.
"I know how some college 'elements' don't like to see other girls - happy. There was this one girl whom I couldn't stand when I had to live in the dorm - a couple of years ago. We - actually - couldn't stand each other - but she acted especially nasty around me while I was holding back."
"I know the type - I encounter them sometimes. They just make your skin crawl right away. You can't tell them that - though."
"There is a way to 'give them back - some of their own medicine' in subtle ways - and sometimes - not so subtle manner - when the timing is right."
"Your mother always said that 'time will do more than any other fancy remedy'".
As we sat on the lush grass in the back yard of Lizotchka's parents' ranch style home - that lovely summer morning - I could hardly believe that my best friend was engaged to be married to a handsome American Jew from New York City whom she met at the O.S.U. campus while I was dating a good looking, Gentile college instructor who didn't take me seriously whom I needed to "dump" - the sooner - the better. I dated him since I had nothing better to do "at the moment". I could hardly wait to meet Lizotchka's fiancée as soon as we got back to the city.
Chapter 71
The summer with Lizotchka continued in a fun mode after we came back from the visit with her parents. The next point on my summer agenda was - finally - to meet in person - Lizotchka's fiancée - Artie Trotman - a handsome New Yorker (he looked that way on the photographs) - who graduated from the Ohio State University Business School and was working in New York City for the summer - managing his parents' fine jewelry business.
Lizotchka spoke to him on the phone almost every night but didn't miss him all that much since she and I had fun with our temporary friends that summer. We knew that it was going to be our last quarter at O.S.U - which we didn't tell anybody - which made that summer - more fun.
She and Artie planned their big wedding at her parents' house that fall right after the summer was over - after which our ways would part again for a while. She and Artie were leaving the U.S. for Canada until the Vietnam War would come to an end since Artie avoided the U.S. army draft like a "plague" and Canada was receptive to the U.S. - "draft dodgers". I was happy for Lizotchka even if my family rarely missed a chance to "rub it in" that she is getting married before me.
"You need to dump Jim - it's a waste of your time," she told me - again - one summer evening right before the end of the summer.
"I don't want him at my wedding," she added and I agreed with her.
"Who said Jim is coming to your wedding? I will bring Jack Osborne - he is much nicer and more solid in every way - than Jim. I just met him recently, but he seems solid. Jack will come up from Washington, D.C. where he is finishing his U.S. Army duty; he - recently - came back from Vietnam."
* * *
Artie arrived at the very end of that summer right before their wedding. He was a typical New Yorker - good looking, self-confident - on the verge of being pushy - but basically - he had a good personality and he loved to listen to Lizotchka's and mine - stories from Poland. All three of us had frequent discussions about the Polish people - in general - and our lives in Poland.
"Tell me again how you - guys - dumped the spring water - onto the flower beds instead of drinking it - in that Polish resort," said Artie one Friday evening after Lizotchka and I came back from studying at the huge Ohio State University Library. We were ready for the finals coming up the following week but we relaxed from the books that last weekend.
It was a late, lovely summer evening at the very end of August when the smell of coming autumn days - felt great. After we ate our quick TV dinners - we sat around, sipped some white wine, listened to music hits popular that summer - we did the same thing every Friday night - that summer while we talked - mostly - about our lives in Poland and how nice it was not to live there anymore.
After I opened the doors leading down towards the finished basement which looked like a luxurious small apartment - I saw my friend's mother making a freshly squeezed orange juice for breakfast in the kitchen of the tiny basement unit. She emptied the juicer's glass top into a small glass which she handed to me.
"Thanks, Mrs. Levin", I said as I drank the freshly made juice which tasted great and smelled even better.
"It's a long way from the Communist Poland," I said.
"We had good lives there. We didn't know any better until we came to this country. Anyway - when one's young - it's good anywhere."
"Did you get a decent job right away?"
"Heavens - no. It was hard at the beginning. I didn't speak any English but Alex - even with his good job skills and good knowledge of English - couldn't get a job in his profession for quite some time. The agency kept sending him to do a lot of 'idiot' assignments before he finally got a decent, permanent position in his field."
"The same thing happened to my folks. It's hard at the long beginnings before things - finally - fall into their proper places. People think that once they come to the U.S. with some skills - they will be greeted with a 'red carpet and orchestra' welcome."
* * *
The following morning Lizotchka and I were soaking up some pleasant morning sun in the big back yard of her parents' house. The yard was covered with lush, green, grass - well maintained. Both of us sipped - freshly squeezed orange juice as we were laughing the youthful laugh of the carefree - summer.
"Your engagement ring will cause sensation when the regular session starts at the University," I said and looked again at the decent size diamond shining against her tanned hand.
"I know how some college 'elements' don't like to see other girls - happy. There was this one girl whom I couldn't stand when I had to live in the dorm - a couple of years ago. We - actually - couldn't stand each other - but she acted especially nasty around me while I was holding back."
"I know the type - I encounter them sometimes. They just make your skin crawl right away. You can't tell them that - though."
"There is a way to 'give them back - some of their own medicine' in subtle ways - and sometimes - not so subtle manner - when the timing is right."
"Your mother always said that 'time will do more than any other fancy remedy'".
As we sat on the lush grass in the back yard of Lizotchka's parents' ranch style home - that lovely summer morning - I could hardly believe that my best friend was engaged to be married to a handsome American Jew from New York City whom she met at the O.S.U. campus while I was dating a good looking, Gentile college instructor who didn't take me seriously whom I needed to "dump" - the sooner - the better. I dated him since I had nothing better to do "at the moment". I could hardly wait to meet Lizotchka's fiancée as soon as we got back to the city.
Chapter 71
The summer with Lizotchka continued in a fun mode after we came back from the visit with her parents. The next point on my summer agenda was - finally - to meet in person - Lizotchka's fiancée - Artie Trotman - a handsome New Yorker (he looked that way on the photographs) - who graduated from the Ohio State University Business School and was working in New York City for the summer - managing his parents' fine jewelry business.
Lizotchka spoke to him on the phone almost every night but didn't miss him all that much since she and I had fun with our temporary friends that summer. We knew that it was going to be our last quarter at O.S.U - which we didn't tell anybody - which made that summer - more fun.
She and Artie planned their big wedding at her parents' house that fall right after the summer was over - after which our ways would part again for a while. She and Artie were leaving the U.S. for Canada until the Vietnam War would come to an end since Artie avoided the U.S. army draft like a "plague" and Canada was receptive to the U.S. - "draft dodgers". I was happy for Lizotchka even if my family rarely missed a chance to "rub it in" that she is getting married before me.
"You need to dump Jim - it's a waste of your time," she told me - again - one summer evening right before the end of the summer.
"I don't want him at my wedding," she added and I agreed with her.
"Who said Jim is coming to your wedding? I will bring Jack Osborne - he is much nicer and more solid in every way - than Jim. I just met him recently, but he seems solid. Jack will come up from Washington, D.C. where he is finishing his U.S. Army duty; he - recently - came back from Vietnam."
* * *
Artie arrived at the very end of that summer right before their wedding. He was a typical New Yorker - good looking, self-confident - on the verge of being pushy - but basically - he had a good personality and he loved to listen to Lizotchka's and mine - stories from Poland. All three of us had frequent discussions about the Polish people - in general - and our lives in Poland.
"Tell me again how you - guys - dumped the spring water - onto the flower beds instead of drinking it - in that Polish resort," said Artie one Friday evening after Lizotchka and I came back from studying at the huge Ohio State University Library. We were ready for the finals coming up the following week but we relaxed from the books that last weekend.
It was a late, lovely summer evening at the very end of August when the smell of coming autumn days - felt great. After we ate our quick TV dinners - we sat around, sipped some white wine, listened to music hits popular that summer - we did the same thing every Friday night - that summer while we talked - mostly - about our lives in Poland and how nice it was not to live there anymore.
Each time Artie pronounced our childhood names - "Lizotchka and Maratchka" - she and I - laughed since his strong American accent - could be literally - cut with the knife.
"We were all dressed up in fancy-schmantzy clothes as we walked around the park", I started to relate the events which happened many years prior our current summer - our last summer quarter at this huge Ohio State University. It was great to be graduating and getting the hell out of that gigantic campus.
"Polish people like to dress up in the evenings. They like to have elegant and not so elegant - fun."
"Especially after they generously drink their vodka."
"Do you - guys - ever like to go back to visit this Polish mountain resort - to 'dig up' some more childhood memories?"
"No - not really. There are plenty of nice places to visit in this hemisphere. We - actually - got out of Poland at the right time - while the 'going was good' - according to people who left later."
"I know that some people go back there with their exaggerated stories of their 'new', successful lives in the U.S. They even pretend to have a phony American accent when they speak Polish."
* * *
I hated to see this summer coming to an end. I loved our evenings when the tree of us talked and laughed - mainly about our experiences in Europe. Friday evenings were most fun. The TV played but we didn't watch it since the stereo system's current hits were more important. When I think about those summer days - the songs popular then - play in my head. Dusty Springfield had a huge hit - "I Close my Eyes and Count to Ten." Each time I listened to it - I wished that it would play - at least - for an hour. Luckily - it was a long song even if it wasn't as long as "American Pie" which never ended once it started. Than God I liked that "American Pie" song so it could play a long time.
* * *
Right after Lizotchka's super nice wedding during which my father mentioned that he is going - very soon - to visit Israel so he will pray at the Wailing Wall - for me to walk down the aisle - looking as beautiful as Lizotchka. His prayer go answered very soon afterwards - albeit - not exactly as he hoped for. Jack Osborne - my new, Gentile friend and I - made the plans to get married - after a short engagement due to Jack's - unexpected - orders to finish his U.S. Army duty - in Germany - at the U.S. base in an old city - Nurnberg. I could join him - almost immediately - as a military wife.
"We were all dressed up in fancy-schmantzy clothes as we walked around the park", I started to relate the events which happened many years prior our current summer - our last summer quarter at this huge Ohio State University. It was great to be graduating and getting the hell out of that gigantic campus.
"Polish people like to dress up in the evenings. They like to have elegant and not so elegant - fun."
"Especially after they generously drink their vodka."
"Do you - guys - ever like to go back to visit this Polish mountain resort - to 'dig up' some more childhood memories?"
"No - not really. There are plenty of nice places to visit in this hemisphere. We - actually - got out of Poland at the right time - while the 'going was good' - according to people who left later."
"I know that some people go back there with their exaggerated stories of their 'new', successful lives in the U.S. They even pretend to have a phony American accent when they speak Polish."
* * *
I hated to see this summer coming to an end. I loved our evenings when the tree of us talked and laughed - mainly about our experiences in Europe. Friday evenings were most fun. The TV played but we didn't watch it since the stereo system's current hits were more important. When I think about those summer days - the songs popular then - play in my head. Dusty Springfield had a huge hit - "I Close my Eyes and Count to Ten." Each time I listened to it - I wished that it would play - at least - for an hour. Luckily - it was a long song even if it wasn't as long as "American Pie" which never ended once it started. Than God I liked that "American Pie" song so it could play a long time.
* * *
Right after Lizotchka's super nice wedding during which my father mentioned that he is going - very soon - to visit Israel so he will pray at the Wailing Wall - for me to walk down the aisle - looking as beautiful as Lizotchka. His prayer go answered very soon afterwards - albeit - not exactly as he hoped for. Jack Osborne - my new, Gentile friend and I - made the plans to get married - after a short engagement due to Jack's - unexpected - orders to finish his U.S. Army duty - in Germany - at the U.S. base in an old city - Nurnberg. I could join him - almost immediately - as a military wife.
I missed Lizotchka after she and Artie left for Canada - but with all the awesome stuff happening in my life at that time - my friendship with her - went onto the "back burner" of my priorities - for a while.
My father told Jack and me that "he blesses our union and wishes us a great life - together."
Jack and I had a small wedding - a lovely civil ceremony - shortly after which he left for Germany while I was supposed to join him a month later - flying on the military dependents' - charter flight. That month was a lot of fun - especially when I thought of leaving Ohio State and Columbus, Ohio soon - especially - since my parents kept saying stuff like - "Thank God you got married shortly after Lizotchka. Now - you might be a divorcee - or God forbid - or a widow - but you will never be an old maid."
That month went quickly like a blink of an eye, and I boarded my charter plane in New York's - LaGuardia airport with the direct destination for Frankfort - Germany. The whole flight was semi-lousy since it was cheap but when we finally got on the plane - the eight-hour trip went fast, and we were landing at the Frankfort International Airport in West Germany.
* * *
"God - I am so happy to finally have your here with me," Jack hugged me after I got off the plane. I noticed that he looked really handsome in his civilian clothes. I was glad that I dumped Jim when things got more solid with Jack Osborne - he was a better man for me - so my father's prayers were - answered - even if partially.
"It's great to have you here - away from Jim's daily phone calls," he added as we walked towards the train station. I looked around at the German people and Germany. It looked clean, orderly and nice.
"It feels like coming home - to Europe."
"I like Germany as well - but most of the GI's who have been here awhile miss the U.S. a lot and they frequently say things like 'I can't wait to go back to the 'world' - meaning the U.S.".
"They can't send only the U.S. Army officers to foreign countries. Some of those G. I's act like idiots - no question about it. No wonder that some local people resent them - even if they make money stemming from the U.S. Army's presence."
Jack and I travelled extensively through the western Europe since the G.I. travel tours were reasonable priced and fun. Still - at the end of our six months we were both glad to come back to the U.S. It was already early winter. We stopped at my parents' ranch style home in the east of Columbus, Ohio - for a few weeks before our extensive travel to San Francisco where both of us enrolled in the San Francisco State University to get some advanced degrees. The Ohio State University campus looked differently to me with the fat snowflakes covering the trees and the buildings. We were both looking forward to making a big move across the country. California - here we come!
* * *
Since the winter weather was mild after we started driving west right after the New Year's Eve celebration - Jack and I decided on the summer route towards California. During the second day of our long voyage - suddenly the winter storm unleashed its fury, so we decided to take a sharp turn south and attempt the winter "path" towards the American "wild west". We drove fast - down/south from Kentucky to Tennessee thus we escaped the big snowstorm - which was replaced by rain - vast improvement over blinding snow squalls.
Jack and I had a small wedding - a lovely civil ceremony - shortly after which he left for Germany while I was supposed to join him a month later - flying on the military dependents' - charter flight. That month was a lot of fun - especially when I thought of leaving Ohio State and Columbus, Ohio soon - especially - since my parents kept saying stuff like - "Thank God you got married shortly after Lizotchka. Now - you might be a divorcee - or God forbid - or a widow - but you will never be an old maid."
That month went quickly like a blink of an eye, and I boarded my charter plane in New York's - LaGuardia airport with the direct destination for Frankfort - Germany. The whole flight was semi-lousy since it was cheap but when we finally got on the plane - the eight-hour trip went fast, and we were landing at the Frankfort International Airport in West Germany.
* * *
"God - I am so happy to finally have your here with me," Jack hugged me after I got off the plane. I noticed that he looked really handsome in his civilian clothes. I was glad that I dumped Jim when things got more solid with Jack Osborne - he was a better man for me - so my father's prayers were - answered - even if partially.
"It's great to have you here - away from Jim's daily phone calls," he added as we walked towards the train station. I looked around at the German people and Germany. It looked clean, orderly and nice.
"It feels like coming home - to Europe."
"I like Germany as well - but most of the GI's who have been here awhile miss the U.S. a lot and they frequently say things like 'I can't wait to go back to the 'world' - meaning the U.S.".
"They can't send only the U.S. Army officers to foreign countries. Some of those G. I's act like idiots - no question about it. No wonder that some local people resent them - even if they make money stemming from the U.S. Army's presence."
Jack and I travelled extensively through the western Europe since the G.I. travel tours were reasonable priced and fun. Still - at the end of our six months we were both glad to come back to the U.S. It was already early winter. We stopped at my parents' ranch style home in the east of Columbus, Ohio - for a few weeks before our extensive travel to San Francisco where both of us enrolled in the San Francisco State University to get some advanced degrees. The Ohio State University campus looked differently to me with the fat snowflakes covering the trees and the buildings. We were both looking forward to making a big move across the country. California - here we come!
* * *
Since the winter weather was mild after we started driving west right after the New Year's Eve celebration - Jack and I decided on the summer route towards California. During the second day of our long voyage - suddenly the winter storm unleashed its fury, so we decided to take a sharp turn south and attempt the winter "path" towards the American "wild west". We drove fast - down/south from Kentucky to Tennessee thus we escaped the big snowstorm - which was replaced by rain - vast improvement over blinding snow squalls.
As we continued west - the U.S. started to look romantic and as if taken from American movies. Texas and Arizona looked especially beautiful with their big cactus figures Saguaros standing tall as if they were big groups of some beings guarding the vast lands.
Jack and I got up early each morning to get a big "chunk" of driving done before hitting some slowdowns later during the day. The sunrises over the vast and breathtaking looking areas of the western U.S.A. - felt and appeared simply - awesome. Each morning, we stopped for breakfast in a different town and the food tasted simply heavenly.
When we crossed from Arizona to California, we found out from watching the news early in the morning at the motel - that the Eastern part of the U.S. was - again - struggling with a huge snowstorm. We felt like in a paradise since the temps reached the lovely 21 C or roughly 70 F - with the sun and light breeze - kissing our faces.
We loved everything about California at the beginning - especially the city of San Francisco seemed - magnificent - at first. At first - everything about it appeared super. The cool spring like weather - almost all year around with the exception of thick fog for a few weeks out of the year during winters - felt terrific at first. However, after a couple of years - the traditional, pronounced change of season started to be missing out of our lives.
Jack and I got up early each morning to get a big "chunk" of driving done before hitting some slowdowns later during the day. The sunrises over the vast and breathtaking looking areas of the western U.S.A. - felt and appeared simply - awesome. Each morning, we stopped for breakfast in a different town and the food tasted simply heavenly.
When we crossed from Arizona to California, we found out from watching the news early in the morning at the motel - that the Eastern part of the U.S. was - again - struggling with a huge snowstorm. We felt like in a paradise since the temps reached the lovely 21 C or roughly 70 F - with the sun and light breeze - kissing our faces.
We loved everything about California at the beginning - especially the city of San Francisco seemed - magnificent - at first. At first - everything about it appeared super. The cool spring like weather - almost all year around with the exception of thick fog for a few weeks out of the year during winters - felt terrific at first. However, after a couple of years - the traditional, pronounced change of season started to be missing out of our lives.
Other problems "crawled" out as well connected with California - especially as far as the city of San Francisco was concerned. It started to be "infested" with various criminal elements/homeless population descending on the city with San Francisco's politicians' only answer to that problem was to "make the taxpayer bent over" according to their conservative radio talk show - host/commentator.
Long story short - after two years in San Francisco - upon both of us obtaining advanced, post graduate degrees from San Francisco State University - we decided to get the hell out of California - back to Chicago which was still a "normal" community in many ways. Bye - crazy California!
Chapter 72
When we approached Chicago - the winter storm subsided but the typical Chicago wind kept blowing big snowflakes - around which were twirling in the air - the winter scene looked like a scene from a Russian fairy tale since a lot of them feature winter scene with big sledges zooming through the winter scenery - drawn by tree horses - a famous "troika". Jack and I have been away from winter season for several years. It felt great to be back to the change of seasons.
Our beautiful rental townhouse - newly rehabbed - sat in the middle of Rogers Park - the somewhat affluent Chicago neighborhood. Jack loved his job for a big television station in their news department while I enjoyed my job as a sales rep for a big cookie company - for a while until I started to plan to open my own business.
If I knew then how hard it will be to develop and successfully distribute my own products - I would still do it.
Jack and I worked really hard for a couple of years to get the place ready. The storefront which we expanded - finally - started to look like an attractive looking coffee shop/deli - with the big back room allowing me and my employees to prepare some of my famous bakeries - for delivery to my top Chicago clients - some upscale delis and health food stores in the very heart of Chicago - The Loop.
I felt proud and happy to see my "famous" big and distinctly glowing looking muffins - nicely displayed in fancy Chicago delis. Jack and I had big plans to expand our production and start to distribute - nationally. However - we encountered a lot of big and small - obstacles - on our way - as we attempted to expand.
At first - Jack and I had a lot of big dreams for our business located in a newly rehabbed Chicago neighborhood - full of Yuppies who liked my products at first - then they drifted away while the new ones came - then the old ones came back. As the time went by - I got totally "sucked into" the business while Jack started to resent it for a lot of reasons which made sense to him but not to me.
The main problem which Jack endlessly harped upon - was that the business cost a lot of money to open - then operate - but the profits were puny - to show for. I worked harder than hard and didn't mind at all putting in my "sweat equity" since the rewards were worth my efforts. I loved to drive around Chicago in my Bronco Jeep loaded up to the gills with my beautiful products - as I delivered them to my upscale, "she-she-poo-poo" - clients.
* * *
Three years after Jack and I opened our deli/bakery - he started to have some problems at his job in terms of the TV stations making big changes in their personnel. Jack was removed from the full-time employee status - to the one - "on call - we will call you when we need you". He took it very hard and some other small but persistent demons started to "crawl" into our lives - as well.
Long story short - I faced big crossroads in my life - at that time - so I needed to make some big decisions which involved closing some familiar "doors" and crossing several important and new - thresholds - which appeared scary but exciting. I started to work on some new directions for my life and I promised myself that this time - a man in my life is not going to be the most important factor. My long time, happy marriage to Jack was unravelling, my business which I loved - was "hemorrhaging" money. I needed to take some decisive steps.
* * *
Two years after we opened our deli/bakery during which Jack and I tried to make the business "go" and tried to keep mending our troubled marriage - we decided to separate. He left Chicago to take over our townhouse in Cincinnati which we bought new but our ex-renters - pigs - turned into a pig stay. We closed our business and sold the equipment - recouping ten cent on a dollar of our original investment.
I insisted on staying in our Chicago townhouse which we bought after renting it and after we upgraded it further - I could sell it and make some money since it appreciated a lot. Jack was missing from my life a lot - at first - then I got busy studying for my real estate agent's exams - after which I acquired some new friends - mostly - lovely divorced ladies - like me. Most of our ex-friends - the married couples - disappeared from my life. Good riddance!
My new life began when I turned forty. Each time I went out with some friends and realized that not only I don't need to be calling Jack with explanations - but I could stay up and not risk Jack's criticism - it felt good to be unattached. I thought that I had a luxury of having high standards as far as the new men in my life were concerned. I was interested in meeting a divorced guy - my age - with similar life experiences.
After I met Roberto when I started my Spanish classes since he was a Spanish teacher at the Berlitz School of Languages - I considered him a young "friend" to spend some time with until an older, more interesting prospect - materialized. Roberto was extra-ordinarily handsome, Latin looking Mexican - born in Chicago but familiar with Mexico and everything about it. He wanted to work in the U.S. then go live in Mexico. He acted shy around me but I noticed that he was modest about his great looks even if he liked the attention of most women who were good looking - themselves. Sometimes the ugly women - hate the good looking men even more than they hate the attractive women - it's true of some - not of most - by no means.
I started to be interested in Mexico after Roberto was telling me about it. I thought that it was a lot of fun even if it could end at any time. The events went differently than planned; they - usually - do. I thought that I only "liked" Roberto when we started to spend time together after we decided to study for the broker's exam in real estate. All my middle aged girlfriends were telling me frequently that he was a young "gold digger" wanting to "prey" on a middle aged divorcee. I was suspicious of him - at first - however - as the time went on I began to trust him to some extent and the thought that he would be asking me for some gifts - didn't terrify me anymore.
Long story short - after two years in San Francisco - upon both of us obtaining advanced, post graduate degrees from San Francisco State University - we decided to get the hell out of California - back to Chicago which was still a "normal" community in many ways. Bye - crazy California!
Chapter 72
When we approached Chicago - the winter storm subsided but the typical Chicago wind kept blowing big snowflakes - around which were twirling in the air - the winter scene looked like a scene from a Russian fairy tale since a lot of them feature winter scene with big sledges zooming through the winter scenery - drawn by tree horses - a famous "troika". Jack and I have been away from winter season for several years. It felt great to be back to the change of seasons.
Our beautiful rental townhouse - newly rehabbed - sat in the middle of Rogers Park - the somewhat affluent Chicago neighborhood. Jack loved his job for a big television station in their news department while I enjoyed my job as a sales rep for a big cookie company - for a while until I started to plan to open my own business.
If I knew then how hard it will be to develop and successfully distribute my own products - I would still do it.
Jack and I worked really hard for a couple of years to get the place ready. The storefront which we expanded - finally - started to look like an attractive looking coffee shop/deli - with the big back room allowing me and my employees to prepare some of my famous bakeries - for delivery to my top Chicago clients - some upscale delis and health food stores in the very heart of Chicago - The Loop.
I felt proud and happy to see my "famous" big and distinctly glowing looking muffins - nicely displayed in fancy Chicago delis. Jack and I had big plans to expand our production and start to distribute - nationally. However - we encountered a lot of big and small - obstacles - on our way - as we attempted to expand.
At first - Jack and I had a lot of big dreams for our business located in a newly rehabbed Chicago neighborhood - full of Yuppies who liked my products at first - then they drifted away while the new ones came - then the old ones came back. As the time went by - I got totally "sucked into" the business while Jack started to resent it for a lot of reasons which made sense to him but not to me.
The main problem which Jack endlessly harped upon - was that the business cost a lot of money to open - then operate - but the profits were puny - to show for. I worked harder than hard and didn't mind at all putting in my "sweat equity" since the rewards were worth my efforts. I loved to drive around Chicago in my Bronco Jeep loaded up to the gills with my beautiful products - as I delivered them to my upscale, "she-she-poo-poo" - clients.
* * *
Three years after Jack and I opened our deli/bakery - he started to have some problems at his job in terms of the TV stations making big changes in their personnel. Jack was removed from the full-time employee status - to the one - "on call - we will call you when we need you". He took it very hard and some other small but persistent demons started to "crawl" into our lives - as well.
Long story short - I faced big crossroads in my life - at that time - so I needed to make some big decisions which involved closing some familiar "doors" and crossing several important and new - thresholds - which appeared scary but exciting. I started to work on some new directions for my life and I promised myself that this time - a man in my life is not going to be the most important factor. My long time, happy marriage to Jack was unravelling, my business which I loved - was "hemorrhaging" money. I needed to take some decisive steps.
* * *
Two years after we opened our deli/bakery during which Jack and I tried to make the business "go" and tried to keep mending our troubled marriage - we decided to separate. He left Chicago to take over our townhouse in Cincinnati which we bought new but our ex-renters - pigs - turned into a pig stay. We closed our business and sold the equipment - recouping ten cent on a dollar of our original investment.
I insisted on staying in our Chicago townhouse which we bought after renting it and after we upgraded it further - I could sell it and make some money since it appreciated a lot. Jack was missing from my life a lot - at first - then I got busy studying for my real estate agent's exams - after which I acquired some new friends - mostly - lovely divorced ladies - like me. Most of our ex-friends - the married couples - disappeared from my life. Good riddance!
My new life began when I turned forty. Each time I went out with some friends and realized that not only I don't need to be calling Jack with explanations - but I could stay up and not risk Jack's criticism - it felt good to be unattached. I thought that I had a luxury of having high standards as far as the new men in my life were concerned. I was interested in meeting a divorced guy - my age - with similar life experiences.
After I met Roberto when I started my Spanish classes since he was a Spanish teacher at the Berlitz School of Languages - I considered him a young "friend" to spend some time with until an older, more interesting prospect - materialized. Roberto was extra-ordinarily handsome, Latin looking Mexican - born in Chicago but familiar with Mexico and everything about it. He wanted to work in the U.S. then go live in Mexico. He acted shy around me but I noticed that he was modest about his great looks even if he liked the attention of most women who were good looking - themselves. Sometimes the ugly women - hate the good looking men even more than they hate the attractive women - it's true of some - not of most - by no means.
I started to be interested in Mexico after Roberto was telling me about it. I thought that it was a lot of fun even if it could end at any time. The events went differently than planned; they - usually - do. I thought that I only "liked" Roberto when we started to spend time together after we decided to study for the broker's exam in real estate. All my middle aged girlfriends were telling me frequently that he was a young "gold digger" wanting to "prey" on a middle aged divorcee. I was suspicious of him - at first - however - as the time went on I began to trust him to some extent and the thought that he would be asking me for some gifts - didn't terrify me anymore.
I had an answer ready if that happened - I would say something like - "If you want some nice things - get an extra job to pay for them - since there is no such a thing as 'something for nothing' in this world".
* * *
One summer evening - later that year - Roberto and I were sitting on my small back patio of my newly rehabbed Chicago townhouse - full of colorful flower pots hanging around us. We were sipping some white wine and attempted to study our real estate exam book - big volume handbook - boring - in spite of the writers trying to make it interesting by giving a "real life" examples at the end of each chapter.
The stereo played a Latin ballad - popular that summer - "Maria of My Dreams". Roberto touched my arm - he touched me for the first time in that manner.
"Listen, Maggie. I know that you are attracted to me but I didn't want to talk about it as long as your husband was in the picture."
"I admit that I am attracted to you. I am attracted to several male movie stars as well. So what?"
"I don't want anything from you. Why do you listen to what your girlfriends tell you?"
"So what do you want from me? Are there not enough women trying to get into your bed?"
"I just want you to have a good time. You deserve it. You went through some hard times. You need to trust me. I am not out to hurt anybody."
"I need to ask you something important - namely - if we finally end up in bed - will you always use the 'rubbers' since I don't know where your … hmm..has been - I mean - who visits your bed."
"I will, I will - no problem. I am not involved with anybody at this time. Should I start dating someone - I will - immediately - let you know. And anyway - I make sure that I don't get any STD or anything like that. "
"Really? The chance of this is like if you see 'pigs fly' or 'snowflake not melting in hell' where it will be a 'cold day in hell'".
"You don't give me enough credit for being responsible and honest."
"I do, I do - I know that you're looking out for yourself and that's good. My husband may not be out of the picture - just yet - and if he straightens out - you are out of the picture. I am not getting out of the Cadillac to ride a motorcycle."
Chapter 73
It turned out to be one of the nicest summers - about which I think about with fondness - even though at the beginning of it - Jack moved out of our townhouse and the end of it - Roberto and I became close "friends" with the tension between us - but mainly on my part - growing. I knew that I couldn't easily break up our friendship - even if that was what was needed at that time.
My older brother Max kept telling me things like "have fun with this kid - then dump him when you meet a man on your level - your age." It wasn't as easy as Max made it sound but I was never afraid of making tough decisions when I needed to do it.
One morning towards the very end of that summer I decided to take a decisive step and "cool" my friendship with Roberto even though I knew that it wouldn't be easy - but once I made up my mind to do something - I would attempt to go through with it. I needed to shut the door and cross the next threshold.
* * *
"We've had a lot of fun times but now we need to cool for a while,"
"I am sure that the young thing you have been romancing and made sure you're seen with her - will 'wipe your tears' effectively - should you have any feelings past looking out for yourself."
"I never told you that I will not be dating other people,"
"I never told you that I will not 'drop you like hot potato'",
"Whatever," then he added: "Your idea of friendship is that you need to 'call all the shots' all the time."
"Nothing could be further from the truth. You were the one who told me that you will be 'honest' with me about who you're dating."
"Why does it matter so much? Aren't you looking for an older man?"
"We are just going around and around in this conversation - so it's time to end it," I said and hung up the phone. I thought briefly that Roberto started to act like a little jerk - so it was time to 'rub his nose' in it - not that it would change his current attitude or anything like that. I needed to be away from this situation and let the time do its work.
* * *
A few weeks later when the air already started to smell of the coming fall - my older brother Max called me in the evening.
"I feel kind of sad since I miss Roberto. I didn't think this meant so much to me."
"It will be much better for you after a while. The longer this would go - the harder it would be to let go of it."
"Go out to some ballroom places - get busy with a lot of other people which you have not seen while you were spending too much time with this little punk," he added, and I started to feel much better.
The next morning, I called Dominick - the owner of a popular ballroom studio in Chicago where I was taking group lessons in Tango. It made me feel much better to start a lot of new activities, but I knew that it would take a while before I felt "normal" again - like my usual self - confident and sure of myself.
It's not that Roberto was not on my mind a lot, but I could - at least - keep that new "petty demon" - at bay - while I was busy with other people. If I knew a year before that this "friendship" was going nowhere and will end like this - I would still, make the same choices. After all - there were tons of good times connected to Roberto in a lot of ways. Fun times don't last too long; there comes a good time to move on - and shut the old doors - so the new ones will open.
* * *
I made some new friends in Dominick's ballroom studio. Time was going faster. The fall was turning into another winter. I still missed Roberto - but some days and evenings were much easier than I thought they would be. It was fun to be getting ready for Thanksgiving which I always loved. It would be the first Thanksgiving without Jack whom I missed - but I also missed Roberto.
After the nice Thanksgiving that year - with a couple of lovely, middle-aged divorcees like me - the holiday season that year was almost as much fun as the holidays with Jack. On the bright side of things - I didn't have to worry about his side of the family - holidays or not.
The New Year's Eve Party that year went extremely well in Dominick's studio. I was improving quickly in my ballroom dancing skills while - when all the years that I was happily married to Jack - he not only couldn't stand dancing ballroom - but every chance he could - he strongly discouraged me from dancing - which I have always loved.
* * *
One summer evening - later that year - Roberto and I were sitting on my small back patio of my newly rehabbed Chicago townhouse - full of colorful flower pots hanging around us. We were sipping some white wine and attempted to study our real estate exam book - big volume handbook - boring - in spite of the writers trying to make it interesting by giving a "real life" examples at the end of each chapter.
The stereo played a Latin ballad - popular that summer - "Maria of My Dreams". Roberto touched my arm - he touched me for the first time in that manner.
"Listen, Maggie. I know that you are attracted to me but I didn't want to talk about it as long as your husband was in the picture."
"I admit that I am attracted to you. I am attracted to several male movie stars as well. So what?"
"I don't want anything from you. Why do you listen to what your girlfriends tell you?"
"So what do you want from me? Are there not enough women trying to get into your bed?"
"I just want you to have a good time. You deserve it. You went through some hard times. You need to trust me. I am not out to hurt anybody."
"I need to ask you something important - namely - if we finally end up in bed - will you always use the 'rubbers' since I don't know where your … hmm..has been - I mean - who visits your bed."
"I will, I will - no problem. I am not involved with anybody at this time. Should I start dating someone - I will - immediately - let you know. And anyway - I make sure that I don't get any STD or anything like that. "
"Really? The chance of this is like if you see 'pigs fly' or 'snowflake not melting in hell' where it will be a 'cold day in hell'".
"You don't give me enough credit for being responsible and honest."
"I do, I do - I know that you're looking out for yourself and that's good. My husband may not be out of the picture - just yet - and if he straightens out - you are out of the picture. I am not getting out of the Cadillac to ride a motorcycle."
Chapter 73
It turned out to be one of the nicest summers - about which I think about with fondness - even though at the beginning of it - Jack moved out of our townhouse and the end of it - Roberto and I became close "friends" with the tension between us - but mainly on my part - growing. I knew that I couldn't easily break up our friendship - even if that was what was needed at that time.
My older brother Max kept telling me things like "have fun with this kid - then dump him when you meet a man on your level - your age." It wasn't as easy as Max made it sound but I was never afraid of making tough decisions when I needed to do it.
One morning towards the very end of that summer I decided to take a decisive step and "cool" my friendship with Roberto even though I knew that it wouldn't be easy - but once I made up my mind to do something - I would attempt to go through with it. I needed to shut the door and cross the next threshold.
* * *
"We've had a lot of fun times but now we need to cool for a while,"
"I am sure that the young thing you have been romancing and made sure you're seen with her - will 'wipe your tears' effectively - should you have any feelings past looking out for yourself."
"I never told you that I will not be dating other people,"
"I never told you that I will not 'drop you like hot potato'",
"Whatever," then he added: "Your idea of friendship is that you need to 'call all the shots' all the time."
"Nothing could be further from the truth. You were the one who told me that you will be 'honest' with me about who you're dating."
"Why does it matter so much? Aren't you looking for an older man?"
"We are just going around and around in this conversation - so it's time to end it," I said and hung up the phone. I thought briefly that Roberto started to act like a little jerk - so it was time to 'rub his nose' in it - not that it would change his current attitude or anything like that. I needed to be away from this situation and let the time do its work.
* * *
A few weeks later when the air already started to smell of the coming fall - my older brother Max called me in the evening.
"I feel kind of sad since I miss Roberto. I didn't think this meant so much to me."
"It will be much better for you after a while. The longer this would go - the harder it would be to let go of it."
"Go out to some ballroom places - get busy with a lot of other people which you have not seen while you were spending too much time with this little punk," he added, and I started to feel much better.
The next morning, I called Dominick - the owner of a popular ballroom studio in Chicago where I was taking group lessons in Tango. It made me feel much better to start a lot of new activities, but I knew that it would take a while before I felt "normal" again - like my usual self - confident and sure of myself.
It's not that Roberto was not on my mind a lot, but I could - at least - keep that new "petty demon" - at bay - while I was busy with other people. If I knew a year before that this "friendship" was going nowhere and will end like this - I would still, make the same choices. After all - there were tons of good times connected to Roberto in a lot of ways. Fun times don't last too long; there comes a good time to move on - and shut the old doors - so the new ones will open.
* * *
I made some new friends in Dominick's ballroom studio. Time was going faster. The fall was turning into another winter. I still missed Roberto - but some days and evenings were much easier than I thought they would be. It was fun to be getting ready for Thanksgiving which I always loved. It would be the first Thanksgiving without Jack whom I missed - but I also missed Roberto.
After the nice Thanksgiving that year - with a couple of lovely, middle-aged divorcees like me - the holiday season that year was almost as much fun as the holidays with Jack. On the bright side of things - I didn't have to worry about his side of the family - holidays or not.
The New Year's Eve Party that year went extremely well in Dominick's studio. I was improving quickly in my ballroom dancing skills while - when all the years that I was happily married to Jack - he not only couldn't stand dancing ballroom - but every chance he could - he strongly discouraged me from dancing - which I have always loved.
I also found out that after Jack and I divorced - the feeling of not being subject to his criticism - which at times - were inconsiderate - was one of the positive points of "splitting" up after being a couple for a long time.
* * *
After the New Year's Eve that year - the winter didn't seem too long since it wasn't excessively cold like some fierce Chicago winters. The spring came fast that year - then one of the memorable Chicago summers - which are usually lovely - came around.
It was an important summer since it was the first one without Jack - my husband of many years while my recent love interest - Roberto - also fizzled out of my life. I made new friends - though - with the people in my Rogers Park Real Estate office where I worked. We became a fairly close group and went out - several evenings a week which was fun. That was the first summer without my business which was sold - so I didn't have to worry about it - even if I missed it at times.
It was a new beginning for me - I kept busy with my Real Estate friends and my ballroom dancing friends. Things were different - it was fun. However - I needed some more defined goals and more of a purpose. It was coming soon.
Chapter 74
It was just a beginning of that summer - right after the Memorial Day - when I was meeting my oldest sister - Tina - at the Pittsburgh airport. She flew in from Israel where she has lived most of her life. I have not seen her for many years - ever since we were kids. Her mother and she - left Poland for Israel - when I was a child - while my father and my mother - my dad's second wife - decided to go to the U.S. after we lived in Poland during all my childhood until I was a senior in high school.
I was wondering if I will recognize her from the photos which she kept sending to us from Israel - the nicest one was of her in her Israeli army uniform. She looked radiant and undefeated on it and attractive as well - after going through a gawky stage as a tall and shapeless - teenagers. Still - quite a few years passed since her army days so I - didn't know what to expect after she got off the plane.
"Maratchka - my little sister," she ran towards me after she got off the plane. We hugged - she smelled of the wonderful Italian perfume "Dolce Vita" of which she left me a bottle before she went back to Israel.
I couldn't believe my eyes. She looked like a movie star - dressed in the exquisite clothes by Italian designers plus she walked like a queen - on the top of the world.
"I must look like a 'poor relative' next to you," I said with a twinge of envy. "You have lived in a war-torn Israel - while I have lived in the U.S. - the richest country in the world."
"You don't look like any body's 'poor relations' at all," she said and continued, "but once you come to Israel - you will really feel that you belong there. That's the best place for us and you know it."
"You don't think that the American Jews or Jews in general - contribute to this country?"
"We have always contributed to every country we live in but once we come to visit Israel - most of us - feel - as if we have - finally - come home - that's where we belong - that's our place - for better or for worse."
All the two weeks during the late May of that year - Tina kept telling me all kinds of wonderful things about her life in Israel. I believed most of what she was telling me even though I knew that she was exaggerating quite a bit - as well - trying to impress me. We had a great time telling each other various stories which influenced the major events of our lives.
* * *
After the New Year's Eve that year - the winter didn't seem too long since it wasn't excessively cold like some fierce Chicago winters. The spring came fast that year - then one of the memorable Chicago summers - which are usually lovely - came around.
It was an important summer since it was the first one without Jack - my husband of many years while my recent love interest - Roberto - also fizzled out of my life. I made new friends - though - with the people in my Rogers Park Real Estate office where I worked. We became a fairly close group and went out - several evenings a week which was fun. That was the first summer without my business which was sold - so I didn't have to worry about it - even if I missed it at times.
It was a new beginning for me - I kept busy with my Real Estate friends and my ballroom dancing friends. Things were different - it was fun. However - I needed some more defined goals and more of a purpose. It was coming soon.
Chapter 74
It was just a beginning of that summer - right after the Memorial Day - when I was meeting my oldest sister - Tina - at the Pittsburgh airport. She flew in from Israel where she has lived most of her life. I have not seen her for many years - ever since we were kids. Her mother and she - left Poland for Israel - when I was a child - while my father and my mother - my dad's second wife - decided to go to the U.S. after we lived in Poland during all my childhood until I was a senior in high school.
I was wondering if I will recognize her from the photos which she kept sending to us from Israel - the nicest one was of her in her Israeli army uniform. She looked radiant and undefeated on it and attractive as well - after going through a gawky stage as a tall and shapeless - teenagers. Still - quite a few years passed since her army days so I - didn't know what to expect after she got off the plane.
"Maratchka - my little sister," she ran towards me after she got off the plane. We hugged - she smelled of the wonderful Italian perfume "Dolce Vita" of which she left me a bottle before she went back to Israel.
I couldn't believe my eyes. She looked like a movie star - dressed in the exquisite clothes by Italian designers plus she walked like a queen - on the top of the world.
"I must look like a 'poor relative' next to you," I said with a twinge of envy. "You have lived in a war-torn Israel - while I have lived in the U.S. - the richest country in the world."
"You don't look like any body's 'poor relations' at all," she said and continued, "but once you come to Israel - you will really feel that you belong there. That's the best place for us and you know it."
"You don't think that the American Jews or Jews in general - contribute to this country?"
"We have always contributed to every country we live in but once we come to visit Israel - most of us - feel - as if we have - finally - come home - that's where we belong - that's our place - for better or for worse."
All the two weeks during the late May of that year - Tina kept telling me all kinds of wonderful things about her life in Israel. I believed most of what she was telling me even though I knew that she was exaggerating quite a bit - as well - trying to impress me. We had a great time telling each other various stories which influenced the major events of our lives.
When she was getting ready to go back - I promised her and myself that I shall visit her in Israel - soon. That became a major driving force of my life for quite a while - at that time. Each time I became bogged down with some everyday frustration - the visions of me getting on the plane and heading for Israel - made me feel focused on my goals - making the little demons - dissolved. Those small and medium size "annoying, petty demons" - couldn't penetrate my psyche since I had several goals imprinted in my thoughts.
* * *
I was landing at the Israeli LOD Airport - a year later - with my heart beating like crazy. I have been waiting for that moment for the whole year. As I was getting off the big El Al Israeli plane - I immediately noticed Tina and her older son with his wife and family - expecting me. All of them looked glamorously - like movie stars. That was when I first met her oldest son's family - in person - since before - I only looked at their photos with Tina's glowing commentaries about her family of "Sabras" - the Israelis born in Israel.
All her family spoke English very well even though she and I spoke Polish between us - that way - she and I could easily add some comments which the rest of her family didn't need to hear. I felt at home with her family almost as close as I feel with my immediate family. The three weeks went by like a blink of an eye and I was getting ready to board the plane back to Chicago.
After I came back to the U.S. at that time - I decided to work many hours - as many as humanly possible for the next several years - at which time I would be eligible to get a chunk of Jack pension in addition to my own - which would give me a steady income. My goal was to live - at least - half a year in Israel since the winters there feel like a paradise comparing to frequently - fierce - winters in Chicago which - usually - has beautiful summers by the Lake Michigan - while summers in Israel are excessively hot.
It's always good for me - to have some major goals planned - that way I don't feel like I am drifting aimlessly - God only knows in which direction. One way or another my destiny always calls me "towards" Israel in some way.
* * *
I was landing at the Israeli LOD Airport - a year later - with my heart beating like crazy. I have been waiting for that moment for the whole year. As I was getting off the big El Al Israeli plane - I immediately noticed Tina and her older son with his wife and family - expecting me. All of them looked glamorously - like movie stars. That was when I first met her oldest son's family - in person - since before - I only looked at their photos with Tina's glowing commentaries about her family of "Sabras" - the Israelis born in Israel.
All her family spoke English very well even though she and I spoke Polish between us - that way - she and I could easily add some comments which the rest of her family didn't need to hear. I felt at home with her family almost as close as I feel with my immediate family. The three weeks went by like a blink of an eye and I was getting ready to board the plane back to Chicago.
After I came back to the U.S. at that time - I decided to work many hours - as many as humanly possible for the next several years - at which time I would be eligible to get a chunk of Jack pension in addition to my own - which would give me a steady income. My goal was to live - at least - half a year in Israel since the winters there feel like a paradise comparing to frequently - fierce - winters in Chicago which - usually - has beautiful summers by the Lake Michigan - while summers in Israel are excessively hot.
It's always good for me - to have some major goals planned - that way I don't feel like I am drifting aimlessly - God only knows in which direction. One way or another my destiny always calls me "towards" Israel in some way.
Now-a-days - I can "bite my time" and wait for my Israel destiny "calls". I got a big chunk of Jack's and my own - pensions so every day is good - if it's an only a "normal" - day without any drama for which I try to be prepared - as much as possible.
* * *
I have always liked the Memorial Day weekend which starts the summer season. I remember the Memorial Day two years ago in Chicago which always looks glorious during the early and later summer - especially when the Lake Michigan shines with emerald shades in the sunshine. The world seems beautiful - notwithstanding tons of problems which Chicago faces every year. Some of those "demons - the big ones and the petty ones" - disappear for a while. Even if the new ones appear - they can be kept - at bay. The Memorial Day weekends in Chicago - are lovely - every year with sunny and cool - weather - my most favorite kind.
* * *
I have always liked the Memorial Day weekend which starts the summer season. I remember the Memorial Day two years ago in Chicago which always looks glorious during the early and later summer - especially when the Lake Michigan shines with emerald shades in the sunshine. The world seems beautiful - notwithstanding tons of problems which Chicago faces every year. Some of those "demons - the big ones and the petty ones" - disappear for a while. Even if the new ones appear - they can be kept - at bay. The Memorial Day weekends in Chicago - are lovely - every year with sunny and cool - weather - my most favorite kind.
I didn't think at that time that two years later I will be in hilly Pittsburgh's - Squirrel Hill - which - now-a-days - beats Chicago - three heads - in every possible way. It's not that Pittsburgh doesn't have problems but not the kind which have been plaguing Chicago - last several years. It was the right time to get the hell out of Chicago while the "going was good".
* * *
I remember a certain glorious summer in Chicago which came right after the one which was extremely, excessively, oppressively - hot, humid and bothersome - which made the coming fall feel like a paradise on earth. The following summer - however - started out cool and pleasant with a slight breeze from the Lake Michigan - making it feel great. It continued in that mode for the whole summer. My best friend - Alice has had a beautiful condo on Lake Shore Drive - with the gorgeous view of Lake Michigan full of boats and people on the beach.
She and I - frequently - took long walks along the city beach visible from her fifteenth story high condo. The beach felt and looked differently while we were down there - then - it felt inside her condo. Afterwards - we - frequently - ate a delicious lunch she fixed accompanied by a glass of good red wine. Her lovely condo felt homey and familiar - as we talked for hours since both of us liked to talk a lot - while the summer chatters of the lovely summer days - ended after a few hours but it could last a lot longer.
During the same Chicago summer - the lush Grant Park in Chicago's Loop - frequently had concerts and summer events in which Alice and I - participated many times - each summer so we talked about them when the fall rolled around quickly after the beautiful summers.
* * *
I remember a certain glorious summer in Chicago which came right after the one which was extremely, excessively, oppressively - hot, humid and bothersome - which made the coming fall feel like a paradise on earth. The following summer - however - started out cool and pleasant with a slight breeze from the Lake Michigan - making it feel great. It continued in that mode for the whole summer. My best friend - Alice has had a beautiful condo on Lake Shore Drive - with the gorgeous view of Lake Michigan full of boats and people on the beach.
She and I - frequently - took long walks along the city beach visible from her fifteenth story high condo. The beach felt and looked differently while we were down there - then - it felt inside her condo. Afterwards - we - frequently - ate a delicious lunch she fixed accompanied by a glass of good red wine. Her lovely condo felt homey and familiar - as we talked for hours since both of us liked to talk a lot - while the summer chatters of the lovely summer days - ended after a few hours but it could last a lot longer.
During the same Chicago summer - the lush Grant Park in Chicago's Loop - frequently had concerts and summer events in which Alice and I - participated many times - each summer so we talked about them when the fall rolled around quickly after the beautiful summers.
The winter holidays with Chicago splendidly decorated in Italian lights - followed right after the Thanksgiving during which Alice frequently fixed a traditionally nice - buffet supper. I - normally - took some dark meat turkey pieces home - to make me turkey sandwiches the next day. After the Thanksgiving - however - I couldn't even look at turkey for quite a while.
* * *
The New Year's Eve party at Alice's that year - was also memorable in a lot of ways. Usually, those New Year's Eves at Alice's were fun - she normally - broiled - salmon or some other good and healthy stuff but that year - that New Year's Eve turned out "differently". It was the first time that she invited her cousin - Laura - a barely a relative - like a "third cousin - four times removed".
* * *
The New Year's Eve party at Alice's that year - was also memorable in a lot of ways. Usually, those New Year's Eves at Alice's were fun - she normally - broiled - salmon or some other good and healthy stuff but that year - that New Year's Eve turned out "differently". It was the first time that she invited her cousin - Laura - a barely a relative - like a "third cousin - four times removed".
Laura - immediately - got on my nerves since she started to act bossy and overbearing - as if to impress people. In addition - she looked masculine and unattractive - no lipstick - no make-up of any kind. I can understand that some exceptional beauties could get away with no make-up - but that was not the case with her - far from it.
I have always liked to be surrounded by attractive women - not to sleep with them or anything like that - but I feel comfortable and secure when I am around good looking, elegant women since they are - usually - accomplished and have a lot of depth to them. That was not the case with Laura since she impressed me as bossy and abrasive for no special reason - even though she bragged repeatedly that she worked as a physical therapist - so she - evidently - felt entitled to talk like a doctor/specialist of some kind.
I have always liked to be surrounded by attractive women - not to sleep with them or anything like that - but I feel comfortable and secure when I am around good looking, elegant women since they are - usually - accomplished and have a lot of depth to them. That was not the case with Laura since she impressed me as bossy and abrasive for no special reason - even though she bragged repeatedly that she worked as a physical therapist - so she - evidently - felt entitled to talk like a doctor/specialist of some kind.
She did attempt to keep her abrasive and overbearing qualities "on the leash" after Alice - evidently - told her something about it so - after she got a few "hints" to that affect she subdued her personality to some extent; Laura's nasty habits - however - did slip out quite a bit during that whole New Year's Eve night.
I decided to leave immediately after midnight that night -even though we originally planned on me staying in Alice's big study on a large sofa - where I - usually slept when I - occasionally stayed overnight at Alice's beautiful, big penthouse. I knew that Chicago's always free - on New Year's Eve - express bus - will be packed like "sardines in a can" but I decided to go. The last thing I needed on the New Year's Eve - was for some ugly Lesbian like Laura - crawling into my sofa - since she was also planning to spend a night at Alice's.
At the end of that night - I was kind of proud of myself - since I was able to keep myself from expressing my disgust at Laura's abrasive behavior which improved some still - she was getting on my nerves and - as I later found out - Laura was working Alice's nerves - as well even after she improved a bit.
Still - our comments went to the right place since she improved a tad - so the evening turned out fun - after all. The good champagne flowing that evening - even before the midnight toast - also needs to be credited with making that evening fun - after all.
It was a good thing that after that night - Alice rarely invited Laura who was getting on her nerves - as well. I try to stick to my rule of not saying negative stuff about anybody's relatives - unless the party who has those kinds of relations - starts talking about them - which is - usually - the case. As a rule of thumb - I try to stay away from negative, bitchy talk - unless it's absolutely necessary for some good cause - at the end.
* * *
One of the nicest early summers which left tons of fun memories - was our last summer in Poland in the middle of which we left that country permanently. The U.S.A. was still a mysterious land to me which I knew only from the American movies - enormously popular in Poland. The Polish ocean liner "Stefan Batory" - docked in the Polish port of Gdynia - the huge ship appeared majestic and impressive as we boarded it.
I glanced - for the last time - at the disappearing shores of Poland - as the ship was slowly leaving the port. My new dreams about New York and the U.S.A. - danced in my head. The liner was big and luxurious. I - immediately - found some friends my age and we hung out together almost every day - the whole day and the whole evening - so the ten days were fun and went fast like a blink of an eye. Only one night was rough - the huge ship swayed in the middle of the ocean like a husk of a walnut - but the following morning - the weather was good again with a few clouds in the sunny sky. The salty smell of the ocean was magnificent; I remember it - like it was yesterday.
The next day after leaving Poland - we docked briefly in Denmark's - Copenhagen which appeared beautiful and full of colors which were missing in Poland. The next brief stop was almost at the end of the journey - at the Canadian port - Quebec - which also appeared like taken from the glorious fairy tale.
When we finally ended our voyage and docked in hilly Montreal - I and my family were totally thrilled with the West after living in Communist Poland for many years. However - our first year in the U.S. was tough - since we were newcomers to the new country - still after several years in the U.S. and overcoming quite a few hardships - we settled permanently in the U.S. and rarely thought of Poland - not considering visiting it - since there were many other interesting places to explore - mainly Israel - where my oldest sister has lived for many years.
Three years after arriving in Columbus, Ohio where our cousins worked for the huge Ohio State University - I met - through some mutual friends - Ohio State students - and married my long term husband - Jack Osborne who was finishing his army duty while I completing my senior year at Ohio State. He had six months left in the army - but we had an opportunity to live in Western Europe since his last six months' orders were for West Germany.
* * *
While we were in Western Europe six months - Jack and I - travelled extensively. They had GI tours at that time which were reasonably priced. Our most memorable memory has to be the several nights we spent in Paris while we stayed in an old hotel - named appropriately - "L' Opera Hotel" - located right next to Paris Opera. I have seen on some newscast - several years after our stay - that "L' Opera Hotel" had to be demolished since it was getting very old and decrepit. It was old and decrepit - all right - even when we stayed there - nevertheless - the breakfast they served there - tasted heavenly. The fresh croissants tasted great just like the raspberry jam they served - which was not overly sweet - the way they do it in the U.S. The Parisian butter tasted sweet - not salty - like in most places in the U.S. but coffee and warm milk had a fabulous flavor and looked super - served in nice porcelain dishes instead of the paper silver ware - used in most American hotels.
Chapter 75
After we came back to the U.S. from Germany - we decided to complete our university studies in San Francisco - at San Francisco State University. At that time - California was not nearly as crazy and "infested" with corrupt Socialist politicians - as it is today. However - after Jack and I finished our studies - we were happy to get the hell out of San Francisco and away from California - as we headed for Chicago where Jack got a job as a television news photographer - working for a famous Chicago television station.
We spent many - mostly happy - years in Chicago which was a beautiful international city for a long time. However - eventually - Jack wanted out of Chicago since working in the news department allowed him to see the most unsavory, violent and ugly parts of the city which most people living there never "experience".
It was a good thing that after that night - Alice rarely invited Laura who was getting on her nerves - as well. I try to stick to my rule of not saying negative stuff about anybody's relatives - unless the party who has those kinds of relations - starts talking about them - which is - usually - the case. As a rule of thumb - I try to stay away from negative, bitchy talk - unless it's absolutely necessary for some good cause - at the end.
* * *
One of the nicest early summers which left tons of fun memories - was our last summer in Poland in the middle of which we left that country permanently. The U.S.A. was still a mysterious land to me which I knew only from the American movies - enormously popular in Poland. The Polish ocean liner "Stefan Batory" - docked in the Polish port of Gdynia - the huge ship appeared majestic and impressive as we boarded it.
I glanced - for the last time - at the disappearing shores of Poland - as the ship was slowly leaving the port. My new dreams about New York and the U.S.A. - danced in my head. The liner was big and luxurious. I - immediately - found some friends my age and we hung out together almost every day - the whole day and the whole evening - so the ten days were fun and went fast like a blink of an eye. Only one night was rough - the huge ship swayed in the middle of the ocean like a husk of a walnut - but the following morning - the weather was good again with a few clouds in the sunny sky. The salty smell of the ocean was magnificent; I remember it - like it was yesterday.
The next day after leaving Poland - we docked briefly in Denmark's - Copenhagen which appeared beautiful and full of colors which were missing in Poland. The next brief stop was almost at the end of the journey - at the Canadian port - Quebec - which also appeared like taken from the glorious fairy tale.
When we finally ended our voyage and docked in hilly Montreal - I and my family were totally thrilled with the West after living in Communist Poland for many years. However - our first year in the U.S. was tough - since we were newcomers to the new country - still after several years in the U.S. and overcoming quite a few hardships - we settled permanently in the U.S. and rarely thought of Poland - not considering visiting it - since there were many other interesting places to explore - mainly Israel - where my oldest sister has lived for many years.
Three years after arriving in Columbus, Ohio where our cousins worked for the huge Ohio State University - I met - through some mutual friends - Ohio State students - and married my long term husband - Jack Osborne who was finishing his army duty while I completing my senior year at Ohio State. He had six months left in the army - but we had an opportunity to live in Western Europe since his last six months' orders were for West Germany.
* * *
While we were in Western Europe six months - Jack and I - travelled extensively. They had GI tours at that time which were reasonably priced. Our most memorable memory has to be the several nights we spent in Paris while we stayed in an old hotel - named appropriately - "L' Opera Hotel" - located right next to Paris Opera. I have seen on some newscast - several years after our stay - that "L' Opera Hotel" had to be demolished since it was getting very old and decrepit. It was old and decrepit - all right - even when we stayed there - nevertheless - the breakfast they served there - tasted heavenly. The fresh croissants tasted great just like the raspberry jam they served - which was not overly sweet - the way they do it in the U.S. The Parisian butter tasted sweet - not salty - like in most places in the U.S. but coffee and warm milk had a fabulous flavor and looked super - served in nice porcelain dishes instead of the paper silver ware - used in most American hotels.
Chapter 75
After we came back to the U.S. from Germany - we decided to complete our university studies in San Francisco - at San Francisco State University. At that time - California was not nearly as crazy and "infested" with corrupt Socialist politicians - as it is today. However - after Jack and I finished our studies - we were happy to get the hell out of San Francisco and away from California - as we headed for Chicago where Jack got a job as a television news photographer - working for a famous Chicago television station.
We spent many - mostly happy - years in Chicago which was a beautiful international city for a long time. However - eventually - Jack wanted out of Chicago since working in the news department allowed him to see the most unsavory, violent and ugly parts of the city which most people living there never "experience".
I - however - thought for a long time - that I will always want to live there - notwithstanding - the negative sides of Chicago. Lately - thought - I made a firm decision to get the hell out of Chicago back to hilly Pittsburgh's - Squirrel Hill which - beats crime, and semi-criminals' - infested Chicago - at least three heads. My older brother Max who owns a mini rental mansion there - rented me a big unit - this time around - in his small castle. The lady who occupied that unit for quite a few years - moved out by some miraculous happenstance.
Thus - to wit - I don't have any special desire to be visiting Chicago or anything like that. The neighboring Wisconsin - though - has a lot of beautiful places - so I might go there - and if I do - I might visit Chicago briefly - but there is no big rush to go there - otherwise. Bye Chicago and good riddance - for now!
* * *
The last few years I have been listening to several prominent talk show hosts - on the radio, on TV and on YouTube - Larry Elder, Mark Levin, Sean Hannity, Laura Ingraham, Maria Bartiromo, Sebastian Gorka. Those people have tons of right ideas re: the U.S. continuing as a representative, constitutional republic worth fighting for - while a lot of the Left leaning Democrats/Socialists - mixed with a generous "dollop" of admitted American Socialists/Communists - openly advocate for transforming this beautiful U.S.A - into some kind of Socialistic behemoth on the order of the repressive, almost totally - Communist dominated - China.
The current Democratic/Socialist front runner - an old fart, Communistic leaning type - Bernie Sanders - is a hypocritical, super rich senator from Vermont who is - actually affiliated with the Independent Party in the U.S. Senate - openly advocates for Socialism. He accumulated quite a following of Socialist leaning - "Bernie's Brothers".
The problem with many "uber" Liberal Democrats - the hard Left Libs - is that upon hearing many logical arguments against Socialism - trying to creep into the U.S. Constitutional Republic - the way it frequently does - the today's Progressives - as the Socialists call themselves now-a-days - always become irrational and verbally abusive. They are typical fanatics - not wanting to hear the opposite political views or anything with which they disagree. They don't view themselves as evil at all since they justify all the horrors of Communism - as being on its way to Utopia where "everybody will be happy".
The famous conservative radio talk show host - Michael Medved - author of many books and articles on politics - a keen observer of the U.S. and the international political trends - many times opined that the U.S. A's crucial political "twists" and "turns" were influenced by the Divine Providence. This country needs that Providence in the coming 2020 Presidential Elections during which - for sure - the "sneaky" Socialism shall receive a decisive blow - the way it does each time it tries to "crawl" for power - not that it will disappear or anything like that. It will "rear its ugly head" - again - no doubt.
* * *
So far, this spring and coming summer 2019 - have been on the cool side - I hope it shall continue in the same mode since I hate the heat waves. Yesterday - in Orlando, Florida - the enormously well attended rally for Pres. Trump - began his re-election campaign for the presidential elections of 2020 which shall "beat down" the creeping Socialism for quite a long time - it's not that it will not be coming back like a wart which needs to be removed permanently.
Yesterday I noticed on the website of Seb Gorka - the conservative talk show host - who is currently enormously popular - even though it only started six months ago - the article about the newly elected by mostly - illegals - from the New York's - Queens - U.S. congresswoman - Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez. She is from the "uber" Liberal Socialistic/Democrat - district. The article pointed out that she must hate America a lot since she and her "half-brained" followers keep "spewing" hateful and unsubstantiated things about this country. Still - the Mainstream Media - mostly biased in favor of the Leftists - consistently "eats up" - hers - and all the other "uber" Leftists', Coastal Democrats/Socialists' - propaganda. Most American people - take the American Mainstream Media with a huge "grain of salt" - people know that - most of them - are pursuing their own - Leftists' - agenda.
* * *
One of the loveliest summers which was cool and sunny like the current summer 2019 - was the one - quite a few years ago when my family still lived in Poland. At that time - Poland frequently had summers which were cloudy, rainy and nasty but during that memorable summer - the sun was out a lot with a cool breeze preventing the unpleasant summer heat.
It was just a glorious summer which I wished would never end and it was going slow - not really fast - the way - the good times - always seem to - zoom by. Of course - it eventually ended but I still remember the feeling of endless warm days full of the smell of summer flowers with more of that - ahead - until the fall came which was also nice that year. The Polish winters - at least most of them - always seemed pleasant with the snowy sledges - frequently riding fast down the snow-covered hills - many times until the winter wind "demanded" lots of hot chocolate which tasted heavenly after the long presence in the winter scenery.
* * *
This summer 2019 is very exciting, very defining and fun. Pittsburgh's Squirrel Hill is extremely "liberal" area. Most American Jews - especially the younger ones - traditionally vote for Democrats - however - in 2020 - Trump will get quite a few of their votes since the uber Liberal/Socialist/Communist faction of the U.S. Congressional Democrats - are openly anti-Israel, anti-Semitic and in general - hateful toward Capitalism since they want to grab the political power under the pretense of "saving the Earth's climate" before "it's past saving".
Last week as I was having lunch in one of Pittsburgh's - Squirrel Hill many nice eating places - and evidently my small American flag pin - irritated an old Liberal Jewish guy - who immediately - "rubbed me the wrong way" - anyway - since he looked and acted phony; I am sure that his impression of me was also not that good - as well.
"I don't know why the American Jews - currently - would even consider voting for any Democrats at all - after most Dems - finally - 'took off their anti-Semitic masks' during this 2020 election cycle."
Upon hearing my comment - this old idiot acquired an expression on his fat face - as if he swallowed raw fish during his college fraternity initiation - while I simply smirked and stylishly left that deli without even looking at that old fart - again.
Pittsburgh's Squirrel Hill is full of various well-educated people who have lived here for quite a while - and they are not some idealistic, misguided youngsters - who honestly believe in the New American Socialistic Utopia which doesn't end up like all of them invariably do - in millions of innocent people being killed in "re-education" - death camps of different Socialistic - sorts.
The smart U.S. people of every kind will be voting for Trump in 2020 because the extreme Socialistic political elements are - again - "rearing their ugly heads" in the U.S; during this defining and crucially important 2020 Elections cycle - the Marxists/Socialists in the U.S. (the extreme Democratic/Socialistic politicians' masks - are off) as they - openly - fight to grab political power in the U.S. They have been doing that since the beginning of the Twentieth Century when Russia became Soviet Red - however - each time they attempt it - they "bite the dust" - still - they keep trying. The U.S. Lefties used to call themselves "Anarchists" which is a lot more accurate description of their political activities.
* * *
The summer of 2019 is halfway gone in Pittsburgh's Squirrel Hill since the 4th of July weekend is almost here. Last night NBC broad casted the debate between the ten Democratic presidential candidates. Those were the "weightier" ten than the ten which debated during the previous night - on June 26 - 2019.
All the Democratic candidates for U.S. presidential elections of 2020 - currently - shamelessly embrace the Extreme Leftist/Socialistic - political talking points - one of the main ones being - covering the illegals who arrive in this country - breaking the law - with free health insurance. We all know that those new, political points by the Democrats went over with all the thinking Americans - like a proverbial "lead balloon".
Following the second collective Democratic presidential candidates - 2020 - debate on Jun. 27 - 2019 - the U.S and the International news media outlets - the prevailing majority of them - anyway - and even the most Leftists' biased ones - so far - laugh at the Democrats and their "cockamamie" political notions which will quickly bankrupt a country even as rich as the U.S. Tons of the smart Americans of every kind will vote for Trump - for sure.
Many poor Americans - either born here or naturalized - as well as many U.S. legal residents who wait "in line" to get to the U.S. plus they contribute quite a bit to this country - all of them need the benefits - before the illegals - who break the immigration laws - to get into the U.S. The priority in granting the U.S. benefits should go to the U.S. Veterans - many of whom are homeless and need the U.S. funds - which are the same benefits that the Democrats are ready to "fork over" to the illegals - who are massively crossing the U.S. borders in violation of the U.S. laws that urgently need to be fixed by the U.S. Congress Democrats.
The Democrats shamelessly use the illegals to "demagogue" their political goals - mainly - in terms of building themselves voting blocs consisting of the illegals - many of whom - vote now - in violation of all the U.S. voting statutes.
* * *
Chapter 76
One of the nicest springs of which the details become slightly fuzzy as the time goes by - was the one - quite a few years ago - which I spent in Jerusalem, Israel when I visited my oldest sister - Tina who lives in Haifa's beautiful Carmel - in a glorious townhouse overlooking the Mediterranean Sea.
To make a long story - shorter and more interesting - I was invited to visit Jerusalem for a few days by Tina's friends who were supposed to show me around than leave for their yearly New York city visit since they were rich, religious New Yorkers who maintain two residences. When I got to their big, Jerusalem apartment on the top floor of the four unit building in the German part of Jerusalem - they had a sudden change in plane tickets whereby - they had to leave - immediately. I had a choice to stay a few days by myself then return the keys in - to the neighbor - the condo owner on the floor below - or return to Haifa.
I chose to stay a few days by myself - not knowing the city. The place was decorated in an old style, heavy furniture - but the old kitchen was well equipped, and they showed me around their apartment before they left. It was an early spring, cool, sunny morning. My coffee tasted heavenly with a slice of a scrumptious apple strudel as I sipped it slowly while I glanced at the hilly city of Jerusalem which appeared totally - gloriously - glorious - from the top terrace of their top floor apartment.
After that I changed my mind and decided to return the keys to the neighbor on the lower floor and call Tina to ask her to pick me up after I explained the new situation to her. Then I heard the knock on the main door then asked in English who is on the other side - thinking that perhaps Tina's friends forgot something.
"It's your neighbor from downstairs," I heard the pleasant male voice. I thought - for some reason - that the neighbor downstairs was "an old fart" which sounded squeaky like an old, unoiled machine - but he turned out to be an attractive, early-middle aged Israeli who spent most of the year in Miami Beach - as he later told me - when he was relating to me his life's story during the scrumptious, late night supper we were having later that night at a gorgeous Jerusalem restaurant with our table discreetly - on the side - but with the beautiful view of Jerusalem - at night.
After I asked him that morning if he knew his way around Jerusalem - since I had to stay only a few days - then return to Haifa - he offered to take me to show me "Jerusalem at night" later that evening. I did ask him if he was married or committed in a big way of some sort since I had a rule not to go after any other woman's man.
"I am not committed, and I am not married but even if I was - what do you care? You are returning to Haifa in a few days - then to the States - but I may not be making a pass at you - anyway."
"Fat chance of that. Do pigs fly? I noticed how you examine me and immediately know tons about me - just like most Israelis know a lot right away about the Americans whom they encounter."
"Okay - okay - I will see you at seven but eat a light lunch since we shall have a big dinner in the Jerusalem's finest eatery," he laughed an easy laugh of a successful guy - used to easily "having his way" with his life's goals, attractive women and everything else he attempted.
As we were having a glass of white wine in a nicely decorated, top Jerusalem eatery - before our dinner of fish was prepared - "the catch of the day" - allegedly - flown earlier that day from the Israeli fishing place - the Sea of Galilee - Jonathan or Yoni - as was his Israeli nickname - related to me that he recently sold his successful business in Miami and decided to go to the massage school to become a massage therapist for an orthopedic doctor in Miami.
"That's a drastic change in your life's direction but how does living in Israel - fit in this 'puzzle'", I wanted to know.
"The same way you're coming to visit Israel in your early middle age fits in your 'puzzle'. Unless you have some considerable money reserves - if you move here permanently - you will have to 'rough it' quite a few years - in some village kibbutz with a lot of nosey women sticking their noses in your business all the time. Then - after you learn Hebrew - it will be hard for you to get a job since you don't have any special skills - in demand in Israel."
"Thanks for your optimistic and encouraging vision for my future life in Israel. I will stay in the U.S. - though - until my ex-husband's and mine - pensions start paying out - then I will make a move to Israel."
"That's a much better plan."
"As if you have anything to say about my life's plans."
"We are just having a casual chat like two strangers who talk - during the long trip on the airplane. I forgot to mention that you make a strong impression on men or anybody who encounters you. You appear enormously brave, attractive, focused and successful."
"It's all true about me but I wish I felt that way all the time."
"Nobody does - unless they are locked up in a nuthouse but as long as you feel that way - most of the time - that counts a lot. It makes people who meet you - feel the same way about themselves - at least - for as long as they are around you. That energy is just as obvious as the color of your eyes which are gorgeous green - by the way."
"'By the way' - no need to exaggerate your complements. I will sleep with you later tonight, but you need to use the rubbers which we can buy after we get out of here."
"I have some rubbers in my unit. Just in case I encounter a celebrity looking and acting - beauty like you."
"Stop with your complements - already - because if 'it gets any thicker - we will need a shovel'. All I know about you is what my sister's friends told her - namely - that you bought your Jerusalem unit six months ago and - allegedly - you paid cash for it - according to the real estate agent."
"That's not enough for you?"
"That's enough. Now let's discuss what we will be doing later tonight so there are no surprises - ahead."
"What would you like me to do later on?"
"I will tell you when we get to your unit - but remember - no 'kinky' stuff of any kind. No props like masks or anything disgusting like that. It's a good thing that if I don't like your 'style' - I will have a short distance - back - to my place."
The fish and the vegetables - beautifully presented - arrived at our table. Our meal looked and smelled - delicious. The Israeli music playing in the restaurant sounded good.
"One more thing - I want you to know - I am not looking to get married or to live with anybody nor to "hook up" permanently. I like to be my own boss after my ex-husband and I divorced - following our long term, successful marriage - speaking of which - if you have never been married or lived with anybody for an extended time - I am breaking this date - because if it's true - then something must be wrong with you."
"I was married twice - just finished paying for college of my youngest child," he touched my hand with his tanned, strong palm. I had no clue if he was "fibbing" me or telling me the truth, but I realized that for the first time in my life - I truly didn't care - as long as I felt good about the moment.
* * *
The last few years I have been listening to several prominent talk show hosts - on the radio, on TV and on YouTube - Larry Elder, Mark Levin, Sean Hannity, Laura Ingraham, Maria Bartiromo, Sebastian Gorka. Those people have tons of right ideas re: the U.S. continuing as a representative, constitutional republic worth fighting for - while a lot of the Left leaning Democrats/Socialists - mixed with a generous "dollop" of admitted American Socialists/Communists - openly advocate for transforming this beautiful U.S.A - into some kind of Socialistic behemoth on the order of the repressive, almost totally - Communist dominated - China.
The current Democratic/Socialist front runner - an old fart, Communistic leaning type - Bernie Sanders - is a hypocritical, super rich senator from Vermont who is - actually affiliated with the Independent Party in the U.S. Senate - openly advocates for Socialism. He accumulated quite a following of Socialist leaning - "Bernie's Brothers".
The problem with many "uber" Liberal Democrats - the hard Left Libs - is that upon hearing many logical arguments against Socialism - trying to creep into the U.S. Constitutional Republic - the way it frequently does - the today's Progressives - as the Socialists call themselves now-a-days - always become irrational and verbally abusive. They are typical fanatics - not wanting to hear the opposite political views or anything with which they disagree. They don't view themselves as evil at all since they justify all the horrors of Communism - as being on its way to Utopia where "everybody will be happy".
The famous conservative radio talk show host - Michael Medved - author of many books and articles on politics - a keen observer of the U.S. and the international political trends - many times opined that the U.S. A's crucial political "twists" and "turns" were influenced by the Divine Providence. This country needs that Providence in the coming 2020 Presidential Elections during which - for sure - the "sneaky" Socialism shall receive a decisive blow - the way it does each time it tries to "crawl" for power - not that it will disappear or anything like that. It will "rear its ugly head" - again - no doubt.
* * *
So far, this spring and coming summer 2019 - have been on the cool side - I hope it shall continue in the same mode since I hate the heat waves. Yesterday - in Orlando, Florida - the enormously well attended rally for Pres. Trump - began his re-election campaign for the presidential elections of 2020 which shall "beat down" the creeping Socialism for quite a long time - it's not that it will not be coming back like a wart which needs to be removed permanently.
Yesterday I noticed on the website of Seb Gorka - the conservative talk show host - who is currently enormously popular - even though it only started six months ago - the article about the newly elected by mostly - illegals - from the New York's - Queens - U.S. congresswoman - Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez. She is from the "uber" Liberal Socialistic/Democrat - district. The article pointed out that she must hate America a lot since she and her "half-brained" followers keep "spewing" hateful and unsubstantiated things about this country. Still - the Mainstream Media - mostly biased in favor of the Leftists - consistently "eats up" - hers - and all the other "uber" Leftists', Coastal Democrats/Socialists' - propaganda. Most American people - take the American Mainstream Media with a huge "grain of salt" - people know that - most of them - are pursuing their own - Leftists' - agenda.
* * *
One of the loveliest summers which was cool and sunny like the current summer 2019 - was the one - quite a few years ago when my family still lived in Poland. At that time - Poland frequently had summers which were cloudy, rainy and nasty but during that memorable summer - the sun was out a lot with a cool breeze preventing the unpleasant summer heat.
It was just a glorious summer which I wished would never end and it was going slow - not really fast - the way - the good times - always seem to - zoom by. Of course - it eventually ended but I still remember the feeling of endless warm days full of the smell of summer flowers with more of that - ahead - until the fall came which was also nice that year. The Polish winters - at least most of them - always seemed pleasant with the snowy sledges - frequently riding fast down the snow-covered hills - many times until the winter wind "demanded" lots of hot chocolate which tasted heavenly after the long presence in the winter scenery.
* * *
This summer 2019 is very exciting, very defining and fun. Pittsburgh's Squirrel Hill is extremely "liberal" area. Most American Jews - especially the younger ones - traditionally vote for Democrats - however - in 2020 - Trump will get quite a few of their votes since the uber Liberal/Socialist/Communist faction of the U.S. Congressional Democrats - are openly anti-Israel, anti-Semitic and in general - hateful toward Capitalism since they want to grab the political power under the pretense of "saving the Earth's climate" before "it's past saving".
Last week as I was having lunch in one of Pittsburgh's - Squirrel Hill many nice eating places - and evidently my small American flag pin - irritated an old Liberal Jewish guy - who immediately - "rubbed me the wrong way" - anyway - since he looked and acted phony; I am sure that his impression of me was also not that good - as well.
"I don't know why the American Jews - currently - would even consider voting for any Democrats at all - after most Dems - finally - 'took off their anti-Semitic masks' during this 2020 election cycle."
Upon hearing my comment - this old idiot acquired an expression on his fat face - as if he swallowed raw fish during his college fraternity initiation - while I simply smirked and stylishly left that deli without even looking at that old fart - again.
Pittsburgh's Squirrel Hill is full of various well-educated people who have lived here for quite a while - and they are not some idealistic, misguided youngsters - who honestly believe in the New American Socialistic Utopia which doesn't end up like all of them invariably do - in millions of innocent people being killed in "re-education" - death camps of different Socialistic - sorts.
The smart U.S. people of every kind will be voting for Trump in 2020 because the extreme Socialistic political elements are - again - "rearing their ugly heads" in the U.S; during this defining and crucially important 2020 Elections cycle - the Marxists/Socialists in the U.S. (the extreme Democratic/Socialistic politicians' masks - are off) as they - openly - fight to grab political power in the U.S. They have been doing that since the beginning of the Twentieth Century when Russia became Soviet Red - however - each time they attempt it - they "bite the dust" - still - they keep trying. The U.S. Lefties used to call themselves "Anarchists" which is a lot more accurate description of their political activities.
* * *
The summer of 2019 is halfway gone in Pittsburgh's Squirrel Hill since the 4th of July weekend is almost here. Last night NBC broad casted the debate between the ten Democratic presidential candidates. Those were the "weightier" ten than the ten which debated during the previous night - on June 26 - 2019.
All the Democratic candidates for U.S. presidential elections of 2020 - currently - shamelessly embrace the Extreme Leftist/Socialistic - political talking points - one of the main ones being - covering the illegals who arrive in this country - breaking the law - with free health insurance. We all know that those new, political points by the Democrats went over with all the thinking Americans - like a proverbial "lead balloon".
Following the second collective Democratic presidential candidates - 2020 - debate on Jun. 27 - 2019 - the U.S and the International news media outlets - the prevailing majority of them - anyway - and even the most Leftists' biased ones - so far - laugh at the Democrats and their "cockamamie" political notions which will quickly bankrupt a country even as rich as the U.S. Tons of the smart Americans of every kind will vote for Trump - for sure.
Many poor Americans - either born here or naturalized - as well as many U.S. legal residents who wait "in line" to get to the U.S. plus they contribute quite a bit to this country - all of them need the benefits - before the illegals - who break the immigration laws - to get into the U.S. The priority in granting the U.S. benefits should go to the U.S. Veterans - many of whom are homeless and need the U.S. funds - which are the same benefits that the Democrats are ready to "fork over" to the illegals - who are massively crossing the U.S. borders in violation of the U.S. laws that urgently need to be fixed by the U.S. Congress Democrats.
The Democrats shamelessly use the illegals to "demagogue" their political goals - mainly - in terms of building themselves voting blocs consisting of the illegals - many of whom - vote now - in violation of all the U.S. voting statutes.
* * *
Chapter 76
One of the nicest springs of which the details become slightly fuzzy as the time goes by - was the one - quite a few years ago - which I spent in Jerusalem, Israel when I visited my oldest sister - Tina who lives in Haifa's beautiful Carmel - in a glorious townhouse overlooking the Mediterranean Sea.
To make a long story - shorter and more interesting - I was invited to visit Jerusalem for a few days by Tina's friends who were supposed to show me around than leave for their yearly New York city visit since they were rich, religious New Yorkers who maintain two residences. When I got to their big, Jerusalem apartment on the top floor of the four unit building in the German part of Jerusalem - they had a sudden change in plane tickets whereby - they had to leave - immediately. I had a choice to stay a few days by myself then return the keys in - to the neighbor - the condo owner on the floor below - or return to Haifa.
I chose to stay a few days by myself - not knowing the city. The place was decorated in an old style, heavy furniture - but the old kitchen was well equipped, and they showed me around their apartment before they left. It was an early spring, cool, sunny morning. My coffee tasted heavenly with a slice of a scrumptious apple strudel as I sipped it slowly while I glanced at the hilly city of Jerusalem which appeared totally - gloriously - glorious - from the top terrace of their top floor apartment.
After that I changed my mind and decided to return the keys to the neighbor on the lower floor and call Tina to ask her to pick me up after I explained the new situation to her. Then I heard the knock on the main door then asked in English who is on the other side - thinking that perhaps Tina's friends forgot something.
"It's your neighbor from downstairs," I heard the pleasant male voice. I thought - for some reason - that the neighbor downstairs was "an old fart" which sounded squeaky like an old, unoiled machine - but he turned out to be an attractive, early-middle aged Israeli who spent most of the year in Miami Beach - as he later told me - when he was relating to me his life's story during the scrumptious, late night supper we were having later that night at a gorgeous Jerusalem restaurant with our table discreetly - on the side - but with the beautiful view of Jerusalem - at night.
After I asked him that morning if he knew his way around Jerusalem - since I had to stay only a few days - then return to Haifa - he offered to take me to show me "Jerusalem at night" later that evening. I did ask him if he was married or committed in a big way of some sort since I had a rule not to go after any other woman's man.
"I am not committed, and I am not married but even if I was - what do you care? You are returning to Haifa in a few days - then to the States - but I may not be making a pass at you - anyway."
"Fat chance of that. Do pigs fly? I noticed how you examine me and immediately know tons about me - just like most Israelis know a lot right away about the Americans whom they encounter."
"Okay - okay - I will see you at seven but eat a light lunch since we shall have a big dinner in the Jerusalem's finest eatery," he laughed an easy laugh of a successful guy - used to easily "having his way" with his life's goals, attractive women and everything else he attempted.
As we were having a glass of white wine in a nicely decorated, top Jerusalem eatery - before our dinner of fish was prepared - "the catch of the day" - allegedly - flown earlier that day from the Israeli fishing place - the Sea of Galilee - Jonathan or Yoni - as was his Israeli nickname - related to me that he recently sold his successful business in Miami and decided to go to the massage school to become a massage therapist for an orthopedic doctor in Miami.
"That's a drastic change in your life's direction but how does living in Israel - fit in this 'puzzle'", I wanted to know.
"The same way you're coming to visit Israel in your early middle age fits in your 'puzzle'. Unless you have some considerable money reserves - if you move here permanently - you will have to 'rough it' quite a few years - in some village kibbutz with a lot of nosey women sticking their noses in your business all the time. Then - after you learn Hebrew - it will be hard for you to get a job since you don't have any special skills - in demand in Israel."
"Thanks for your optimistic and encouraging vision for my future life in Israel. I will stay in the U.S. - though - until my ex-husband's and mine - pensions start paying out - then I will make a move to Israel."
"That's a much better plan."
"As if you have anything to say about my life's plans."
"We are just having a casual chat like two strangers who talk - during the long trip on the airplane. I forgot to mention that you make a strong impression on men or anybody who encounters you. You appear enormously brave, attractive, focused and successful."
"It's all true about me but I wish I felt that way all the time."
"Nobody does - unless they are locked up in a nuthouse but as long as you feel that way - most of the time - that counts a lot. It makes people who meet you - feel the same way about themselves - at least - for as long as they are around you. That energy is just as obvious as the color of your eyes which are gorgeous green - by the way."
"'By the way' - no need to exaggerate your complements. I will sleep with you later tonight, but you need to use the rubbers which we can buy after we get out of here."
"I have some rubbers in my unit. Just in case I encounter a celebrity looking and acting - beauty like you."
"Stop with your complements - already - because if 'it gets any thicker - we will need a shovel'. All I know about you is what my sister's friends told her - namely - that you bought your Jerusalem unit six months ago and - allegedly - you paid cash for it - according to the real estate agent."
"That's not enough for you?"
"That's enough. Now let's discuss what we will be doing later tonight so there are no surprises - ahead."
"What would you like me to do later on?"
"I will tell you when we get to your unit - but remember - no 'kinky' stuff of any kind. No props like masks or anything disgusting like that. It's a good thing that if I don't like your 'style' - I will have a short distance - back - to my place."
The fish and the vegetables - beautifully presented - arrived at our table. Our meal looked and smelled - delicious. The Israeli music playing in the restaurant sounded good.
"One more thing - I want you to know - I am not looking to get married or to live with anybody nor to "hook up" permanently. I like to be my own boss after my ex-husband and I divorced - following our long term, successful marriage - speaking of which - if you have never been married or lived with anybody for an extended time - I am breaking this date - because if it's true - then something must be wrong with you."
"I was married twice - just finished paying for college of my youngest child," he touched my hand with his tanned, strong palm. I had no clue if he was "fibbing" me or telling me the truth, but I realized that for the first time in my life - I truly didn't care - as long as I felt good about the moment.
Yoni was attractive and appeared "normal" enough. All I knew that night that it was a beautiful evening, and I was - finally - seasoned enough for all the "possibilities" ahead.
* * *
The next morning, I admitted to myself that it was a super fun and exciting night with Yoni - from the beginning to an end - which I tried to "downplay" in my mind. After all - I was only divorced from Jack for a year - at that time - and it would be good for me to "go through" some more "quality" men - before I "hooked up" - still it was good to be in attractive man's arms since it's been a while for me - being super selective and careful. Yoni certainly knew very well what to do with a woman - in bed and afterwards. Plus - he didn't have any annoying habits which show right away - like smoking or drinking excessively or swearing a lot or talking loudly - all of which always make my skin crawl. I don't know why some quality women pick men - way below - their status.
Early the next morning - I woke up before him and immediately put a mint in my mouth while I put one close to him - thinking that if he wanted to kiss me - our morning breath would not a good thing for anybody. I woke him up and suggested that we have coffee and breakfast early since my sister and her husband will pick me up at noon so I can go back to Haifa before I head back to the U.S.
"I would like to meet your sister," said Yoni with a smile. He skipped the kiss but took the mint to refresh his morning breath.
"You don't think that you're a beautiful, smart woman and a 'big catch'?"
"I might think a lot of things but just because we spent a night together - you don't necessarily need to know all of my thoughts."
"Whatever," he seemed momentarily hurt by my attitude but quickly regained his self-confidence.
"I will call you at your sister's before you leave for the U.S. May I?"
"Of course, you can call me. It was a lot of fun with you. You know that."
Hilly Jerusalem looked gloriously - glorious - on that crisp, late spring morning. We talked a lot about the United States and shuffling back and forth from Israel and back. Time went fast in that lovely coffee shop. Our coffee and croissants tasted heavenly.
My sister arrived with her husband. After they pulled up their Mercedes in front of the coffee shop - she got out of the car looking like a tall, elegant movie star. Her long-term husband always looked like her chauffeur next to her. He never talked much since she - normally - did all the talking in her family.
She spoke a lot to my new friend - Yoni in English and in Hebrew. I could barely "squeeze the word edgewise" with Tina monopolizing the conversation. All of us talked for close to an hour about everything happening in Israel and the U.S.
* * *
The next morning, I admitted to myself that it was a super fun and exciting night with Yoni - from the beginning to an end - which I tried to "downplay" in my mind. After all - I was only divorced from Jack for a year - at that time - and it would be good for me to "go through" some more "quality" men - before I "hooked up" - still it was good to be in attractive man's arms since it's been a while for me - being super selective and careful. Yoni certainly knew very well what to do with a woman - in bed and afterwards. Plus - he didn't have any annoying habits which show right away - like smoking or drinking excessively or swearing a lot or talking loudly - all of which always make my skin crawl. I don't know why some quality women pick men - way below - their status.
Early the next morning - I woke up before him and immediately put a mint in my mouth while I put one close to him - thinking that if he wanted to kiss me - our morning breath would not a good thing for anybody. I woke him up and suggested that we have coffee and breakfast early since my sister and her husband will pick me up at noon so I can go back to Haifa before I head back to the U.S.
"I would like to meet your sister," said Yoni with a smile. He skipped the kiss but took the mint to refresh his morning breath.
"You don't think that you're a beautiful, smart woman and a 'big catch'?"
"I might think a lot of things but just because we spent a night together - you don't necessarily need to know all of my thoughts."
"Whatever," he seemed momentarily hurt by my attitude but quickly regained his self-confidence.
"I will call you at your sister's before you leave for the U.S. May I?"
"Of course, you can call me. It was a lot of fun with you. You know that."
Hilly Jerusalem looked gloriously - glorious - on that crisp, late spring morning. We talked a lot about the United States and shuffling back and forth from Israel and back. Time went fast in that lovely coffee shop. Our coffee and croissants tasted heavenly.
My sister arrived with her husband. After they pulled up their Mercedes in front of the coffee shop - she got out of the car looking like a tall, elegant movie star. Her long-term husband always looked like her chauffeur next to her. He never talked much since she - normally - did all the talking in her family.
She spoke a lot to my new friend - Yoni in English and in Hebrew. I could barely "squeeze the word edgewise" with Tina monopolizing the conversation. All of us talked for close to an hour about everything happening in Israel and the U.S.
After Yoni left, she told me that his Hebrew was very correct - she was visibly impressed with him and didn't even hide it from her long-time husband. Ostensibly - she was happy that I made such a good friend in Jerusalem.
"He is a good looking and smart guy. It didn't take you long to make such a quality friend. Evidently, he has enough money - as well. Now - you need to see to it that he gives you an engagement ring; you got to move fast, though - you might have some younger competition," she suggested jokingly and that got on my nerves a lot in addition to her stupid behavior all morning.
"It's not the first priority in my life. I can feel good about myself without necessarily having a man by my side. I had a great man for many years and that's ended. Now I have a new life - with or without a man by me."
* * *
After I came back to the U.S. following that memorable Israeli trip - I thought about Yoni - some. He called me in Chicago several times and invited me to Florida where he had his second home, but he kept postponing his visiting Chicago (my suggestion) - so I got the message; he lost his original interest in me; he didn't need to draw me a diagram about it. I made my decision - again - that Israel and my connection to it (not really clear to me but strong all my life) - is more important than the man by my side - whereas if I was younger and less "seasoned" - having a man by me side - would be "an alpha and omega" style goal for my life.
Chapter 77
That year went by without any major drama event - thank God - then the following summer appeared. It was an important year since I left Chicago for the third (final) time and moved back to hilly Pittsburgh for the third time - where my oldest brother Max has always lived with his family in Pittsburgh's lovely, international Squirrel Hill - always richly "infested" by wealthy Democrats/Liberals many of them - on the verge of being Socialists.
Those rich Liberals/Socialists delude themselves with the ideas that they will always be safe under Socialism while they ignore the historical facts attesting to the fact that the big Government - the big God of Socialism - always finds ways to "divest" rich people from their money and send them to jails. God forbid if they have to learn the hard way in the U.S. where they have the Socialists - currently - attempt to grab power. They call themselves different names - this election cycle 2020 - they call themselves Democratic Socialists.
I and many other people - firmly believe that the Divine Providence will tip the scales to get rid of the Socialists - but people have to act and they shall. Socialism is like a mythical Hydra snake who has many hissing heads with the new one re-appearing just as soon as one is cut off. They will all be cut off - at once - so the Hydra will slither and die for a while and die in grass - still - this Evil will be at bay - only - it will not disappear for a long time. We shall be vigilant!
* * *
When my sister Tina came from Israel to visit me in Chicago - I was already in quite a decent shape financially and otherwise. The worst was over for me - still - I considered myself lucky that it was not worse circumstances I had to go through. She left me a beautiful photo of her with her Israeli family. She bragged about her life in Israel to no end. It did get on my nerves at times occasions but her visit gave me a goal and a direction which I needed at that time.
Before she left to go back to Israel she hugged me and said, "We - all of us on this photo - will take shape of some kind of angels so you will be protected until you are ready to come to join us - in Israel." I missed her frequently after she left but then the events of my everyday living started to blur her and my future project to leave Chicago permanently.
At that time I was close to Millie - my childhood friend who gave me a poster of a beautiful woman with wings one day and my life started to change for the better in an accelerated manner. I hung it in my bedroom and early each day before I left for work after I recited my short morning prayer - I always glanced at "my" angel/poster on the wall - who at times - seemed real. I had a vague idea that the angels exist in some other reality with different levels for them and they influence the events of our lives. Sometimes things happen as if they were meant to happen.
One morning before I left Chicago - for my first time move to Pittsburgh's hilly Squirrel Hill - our oldest brother Max's "beloved corner" - I found a beautifully published and edited book about the angels. It felt good to touch the smooth, silky pages as I looked through it, but I put it away somewhere and forgot about it for several years - during which I made two subsequent moves back and forth - from Chicago to Pittsburgh and back. I found that "angels" book again several years after I moved back to Pittsburgh for the third time. It was easy to discover that upon putting some daily notes into the pages portraying different angels - something positive always happened.
One time - my best, closest friend and confidante at that time - Millie - asked me briefly about my weekly columns which she read sometimes but rarely if ever -complemented me. By that time - I was used to receiving either praise or contempt - for "my take on the weekly news" - my weekly column which became popular. I knew to be prepared to do something else after that "gig" came to an end. In the interim - it was a lot of fun for a lot of reasons.
"You know that the your 'printed word' every week has a tremendous power to hurt people," she said as if she discovered America all over again.
"Smart people are judicious if given an opportunity to express their opinions which other people read or talk about - that is if they have a 'megaphone' for a while - but they know well that it's a double edge sword. However - they can't be scared to tell the truth which may hurt - at times."
Millie and I were close friends for a long time with her always weighing her words carefully. At times - however - she indulged in the unfair, severe criticism of me which I respected because - at least - she did it openly - not trying to do it behind my back. Eventually - however - our respective "roads" - "forked" as it went into two opposite directions. After I left Chicago - for the third time I didn't hear from her and her family.
When I arrived in Pittsburgh's hilly Squirrel Hill - I realized that after my last "stint" in Chicago for a year - I came to realization that I much prefer Squirrel Hill for a lot of reasons. Chicago became difficult to navigate unless one had tons of money - so far - there are lots of those people there. As a middle income individual - I found Chicago too crowded with tons of poor people of various nationalities - with nothing special for them to do but wait for some unrest - Chicago quickly became a typical big city - run by the Democrats in 2020 - interested in "harvesting" the votes from the illegals of every kind. Most Dems live in their luxurious, gated residences away from all the illegal elements.
Pittsburgh is still "normal" - in a way that most people here - especially - here - in Squirrel Hill have a reason to be here. They either live here or study in the near by universities whereas Chicago became too crowded with various semi-criminal elements and mental cases - of every imaginable sort and nationality.
The public transportation and the streets of Chicago are full of various people who don't belong there. The local Dems - mismanaging that city - need them to vote - illegally - for them. I am not even mentioning the crime and the gangs' situation always plaguing this city and not getting any better. They also have a lot of financial problems with their pensions severely underfunded and taxes going up like crazy. Chicago used to be "one of the loves of my life" - but not anymore. I don't miss it most of the time - even if - I am looking forward to passing through it quickly - on my way to Israel - before long. I - sometimes - wonder - why I was so eager to go back there - in the first place. There had to be a hidden reason for it - but - still it's very good - not to be there.
I try to think positive about it and most of the time - I remember tons of good times I had in Chicago. The memorable quote from the Bible comes to my mind - "There is a time and season for every matter under the Sun."
* * *
This - current - summer of 2019 has been glorious; we will keep it that way; so far - so good - notwithstanding a nasty but short - heat wave which passed - like everything passes - and - for certain - it was one of the very last nasty spells for the season. I can hardly wait for the fall even if I remember lyrics to the lovely song I heard several summers ago which go something like - "Every summer is like a mini life."
Sometimes I think about various nice summers which I can remember and the best moments of them are always associated with some hit summers songs for that season. One crucial and defining - sunny and glorious - summer - quite a few years back - is always magically brought back to me - when I hear Frank Sinatra's big hit - "Strangers in the Night". I still don't get tired of hearing it - whereas other summer hits - when I hear them now - are like a tired old "something" which is no longer valid or interesting. Time to move on - let's get some new, fresh "elements" going!
However my most memorable summer of which I think with fondness - is our first summer in the U.S. I remember the spring - preceding it - felt wonderful when we arrived in the U.S. in May of that year - with our first apartment appearing like a penthouse - however - when the unexpected summer heat waves came upon us - the golden fall which followed felt like a paradise. The big musical hit song of that summer was a fabulous Elvis Presley's re-make of an old song - "I Was Crying in the Chapel."
During the following summer - we already lived close to the Ohio State University - huge campus. My parents worked for the university as research assistants/translators while I started my freshman year there in the department of International Studies. It was hard for my folks to get a decent job in spite of their vast qualifications. Without the connections - their middle age worked against them - however - they never gave up and finally found a decent job but it was a rough going for them - at first.
That second summer was a lovely one - but the one after that was a lot nicer. Almost every day I drove the blue Rambler - our family car - to the local JCC pool where I quickly made some friends my age who also studied at O.S.U. Most of them were nice and "normal" but some kids were snobs. They - evidently - derived their status symbol from the fact that they were born in the U.S. thus they thought they can look down on the immigrants who came to this country and had to "learn" the U.S. - ways.
I liked to "set them straight" about those matters and other things in terms of "enlightening" them that most of the Nobel prizes which improve the life in the U.S. were gotten by the immigrants who came to the U.S. in search of better life. It was a great summer - almost every day at the pool - full of various types to observe. Some - funny acting - middle aged men thought that they had a chance to ask a college girl for a date. Sometimes - men act like idiots.
The Coca-Cola with ice in the plastic cups tasted extra-ordinarily good with the hamburgers after swimming laps in the pool which smelled quite a bit of chlorine and the summer sun - the blue pool water always gleamed - reflecting the sun but - even if some little kids peed in it. The big musical hit that summer was Peggy Lee remake of "The More I See You - the More I Love You." I wished that summer lasted forever but at the end of it - Lizotchka - my childhood friend - invited me to spend the last week of August at her parents' lovely ranch - just before the new academic year was to start at Ohio State University. Her folks lived for many years in their ranch style, spacious house - in Dayton, Ohio - a small town close to Ohio State University's - home - Columbus, Ohio. They also went through some rough times at first - but after some difficult times - have done really well for themselves and their families.
* * *
The first morning when I woke up early at Lizotchka's parents' house at the very end of that memorable summer - I heard a muffled sounds of the musical hit that summer - a song titled "Sunrise - Sunset" since "Fiddler on the Roof" was a sensation on all the major musical theatre scenes - all over the world. Lizotchka was still asleep in her "old" room still full of her little girl's stuff - even though she was away at college.
I got up from my big sofa of her parents' spacious living room and followed the sound of "Sunrise - Sunset" which was coming from the finished basement which looked like a mini apartment with a clean kitchen, shower and a big studio style room. The soft carpet caressed my bare feet. The house smelled of luxury and cleanliness.
Lizotchka's mother - a middle aged brunette - still beautiful - was squeezing fresh orange juice for breakfast - at the high kitchen counter of their small basement unit; the freshly squeezed orange juice smelled heavenly and tasted like Gods' - nectar. I have not seen her for ten years but she still looked very good since she hardly changed in ten years. The same was true about her husband - Lizotchka's handsome - dad.
"What's the matter - Maratchka - you can't sleep in a new place?"
"No, Mrs. Levinsky - I slept great like at home. I love your house. It looks and smells - brand new."
"Your parents bought a nice house - as well."
"It was very hard for them - at first."
"It was difficult for us - too. Nobody is rolling out any 'red carpets' and 'orchestras' of any sort - when you first arrive in this country. The U.S. will 'put you through the wringer' - at first."
After eating a delicious breakfast consisting of vegetable and cheese omelet - made expertly by her - attractive and fun to be around - father - Lizotchka and I stepped out to the Levinsky's back yard covered with lush, green grass. The transistor radio played another hit of that summer "You Got Your Troubles - I Got Mine."
"Your engagement ring looks huge - I bet it attracts a lot of comments of every imaginable kind," I touched her tanned hand. The sun was kissing our muscular, young bodies.
"You need to 'hustle up' one - as well. It's not always easy but you are always 'a go getter'," she laughed an easy laugh of a careless summer.
"It didn't take you long to 'rope' Artie Trotman. But I thought that the American Jews look down upon us - 'the newcomers'".
"I can't believe I hear you speak that way. What's with your customary self-confidence?"
"It's easy for you to say - you always look like a movie star - ever since you were little."
"I can't believe what I hear from you - you who always walks around like you own the Earth - ever since you were little."
* * *
That week at Lizotchka's parents house - went like a blink of an eye. The next time I was at their house was a month later at Lizotchka's wedding to Artie Trotman. They decided to leave the U.S. for a while - for Canada until the Vietnam War would end.
In the meantime - while my father was visiting Israel where my oldest sister - Tina has lived permanently and loved it - he was - allegedly - prayed at the Jerusalem wailing wall so I would get "engaged" or something - since my best friend - Lizotchka - looked liked Princess Grace - walking down the isle in her lovely wedding dress. Shortly after that - I met Jack Osborne and we did get engaged quickly while he was finishing his U.S. Army duty. He was not Jewish but - at least - a part of my father's prayer - got answered - right away.
Chapter 78
The following summer was different - but also defining since it was my first summer in northern California where Jack and I - settled for a few years where we finished our respective college education. The colleges were less expensive there so Jack and I moved there for a while - upon his completing his U.S. army duty.
Ten years ago San Francisco was still - a beautiful city - as far as its physical looks are concerned. Even though it had a lot of big problems - even then since it was managed by - mostly - Liberal Democrats - still - it was not as badly infected by mentally ill/homeless/criminal elements - the way it is now. Jack and I were happy to get the hell out of there after we completed our respective college degrees.
As soon as he got a job offer in Chicago - we were happy to go back towards Midwest - which was "normal" comparing to Northern California which both of us - grew to hate - for a lot of reasons. On the way back we stopped in Reno, Nevada which both - Jack and I - loved; Reno is a charming, picturesque and hilly town but neither one of us could get even a "hint" of any jobs - there; we were happy to head back to Chicago - anyway. Jack's childhood friend - a dentist - was lucky to have established his clientele in a short time. He always said that the Californians are "prunies" which means that their brains are totally dried up by the sun.
* * *
When we first arrived in Chicago - I immediately fell in love with the city and its rich history which was reflected in its international spirit and grandeur - now - however - Chicago deteriorated quite a bit and even though it's still beautiful in some areas - if one has enough money to live there. The Democrats dominating the city - and Catholic Church as well - want to open the city - even more - totally - to the influx of all kinds of illegals - thus the Dems get their "fresh voters" - legal or not - to keep themselves in power - in perpetuity - since they got rid of most Republicans in Chicago area. The city of Chicago is "hemorrhaging" tons of valuable people - who get the hell out in a hurry - due to high taxes of every kind which "kill" them - financially.
In the meantime - the city is stressed financially to the max - according to Chicago's commentators - and is teetering on the verge of bankruptcy - due to tons of underfunded - pensions' funds - as well - almost ready to collapse - if the Chicago politicians continue in this insane mode.
* * *
I vividly remember one Chicago summer which was terribly hot and bothersome - but the following summer turned out cool and pleasant. It felt wonderful to wake up most mornings to a fresh, new day without any heat waves in a forecast. Jack's friends from work - frequently had summer parties with the delicious hamburgers and sausages (Polish sausages - Chicago style) - smoked on the outside grills. Those care free summer evenings were a lot of fun with the food tasting good and the cold beer - tasting even better - like a heavenly nectar of beautiful summer nights.
The following summer - a lot of big changes came to the Chicago TV station where Jack successfully worked for several years and loved his job. The Capital Cities bought the ABC's Chicago's subsidiary and at first - the new owners were not "tightening up the belt" too much - they were even spending some money. Later - however - the Cap Cities started to "tighten up" - the screws - in terms of "cutting the personnel" - so the skeletal news crews had to a lot of extra stressful work - to "pick up the slack".
Long story short - after several years of "the upper management's maneuvers" at Jack's TV station - his position was almost eliminated. He took it harder than other people in similar circumstances in spite of the fact that this drastic change allowed him to sufficiently develop his own enterprises which he started on a part-time bases while still employed at ABC.
Jack and I - but mainly - I - faced a new, big "fork" in our respective futures; we were heading for divorce. While he was generating enough income to continue his middle class lifestyle - I needed to - quickly - get some saleable skills - to support myself. Thank God - it all worked out very well for me - but it was a rough passage. Still - thank God - it wasn't worse.
* * *
The memorable summer for me - was our last summer in Poland before we left for the U.S. I became friends with a teenage girl named Halinka who was several years younger than me. Her older sister was a few years older than me and she was the main topic of most of our conversation since Ella just got engaged with a guy who came back from New York City with tons of complaints regarding what kind of treatment he received as a new immigrant - when he worked there briefly with no knowledge of English. He "sharpened up" his English and Ella and he decided to go to Montreal, Canada - to try their luck there.
I vaguely knew that couple and they seemed totally mismatched in the way they looked - but upon returning from New York City - her sister's fiancée brought a hit record by Bobby Rydell - titled "Sway". We listened to it many times that summer and the fabulous musical arrangement of it including his vocals - sounded great. I pictured the U.S. in the best possible way - listening to this hit. I couldn't wait to get there and start my new life.
That summer was very nice - though. My head was full of dreams of U.S. and how our lives will change - in the meantime - Halinka and I hung out together most of my family's last summer in Poland; we constantly played "Sway" - I never got tired of it - even till today.
Whenever I hear "Sway" - that last summer in Poland feels close.
Halinka always told me lots of different kinds of stories. She liked to gossip about the people we knew - in a humorous manner - she didn't say mean things or anything like that but she was funny. She never broached the subject of her parents who were both attractive looking with were many wild rumors circulating regarding her handsome father carrying on with his ugly looking and old - secretary. He was a Communist Party hack - so they had an extra luxurious, big, two level, soft loft style - apartment and lots of nice things. My father never joined the Communist Party since he always hated the Communists - still - my family also lived well in Poland. At the end of that summer - I knew that I will miss that last summer with my friends but the exciting vision of my new life in the U.S. - made me think of the next summer in the U.S.
* * *
My first summer in the U.S. began in a glorious manner with the weather being beautiful and everything going super good during the first part of it - however - when the first heat waves appeared - I started to wait for the fall. After it arrived in her golden splendor - ever since that time - I always wait for autumn because the summer starts getting on my nerves - big time - at the very end of it - every summer like a "clockwork".
That summer was actually hard in some ways since I had to go to summer school that year to polish up my English so I could start Ohio State University in the fall. The following summer - however - was tons of fun from the beginning to an end. I was done with the first year at O.S.U. - the worst was over for quite a while. My new friends at Ohio State have shared with me a lot of the tips - regarding how to survive that first year since they also came from another country. Various short-cuts come handy.
* * *
My second summer in the U.S. after I finished my first year at Ohio State University was one of the nicest I can remember. Almost every morning I drove our first family car - a blue Rambler to the JCC - pool which was big and well maintained. The sound system played nice tunes - the hits of that summer; I remember some of them till today. Peggy Lee had a hit - "The More I See You - the More I Love You". The new friends I made at the pool that summer - were the upper classmen at Ohio State and most of them were nice and friendly while several of them had an "attitude" at first - until my friend and I "straightened" them out regarding how not to be "stuck up" about their attributes which they - evidently - considered to make them better than other people.
* * *
During the following summer - I already finished my second year at Ohio State University taking a lot of courses which interested me so I could declare my major as International Studies but several required courses gave me problems at that time so I avoided them hoping to get "around" them.
At the end of that summer - my requirements problem got solved in a way which I never expected. During that summer - my two girlfriends and I drove around and had fun. We listened over and over to the hit of that summer by the Grass
* * *
One beautiful, late summer morning during that summer which I call the summer of Grass Roots hit - "Living for Today" - two of my girlfriends and I drove out of town to visit our third friend - Annie who invited us to "introduce us to a new man in her life". We have not seen her for a year.
The three of us drove out of town towards Westerville - the middle class suburb of Columbus, Ohio. We played "Living for Today" over and over as we laughed the careless laugh of a beautiful summer. The summery scenery looked lush and fresh so we opened the car windows to enjoy the breeze before we got into the farms' area where the breeze would mingle with the smell of cows' manure.
Kristy - the blond haired, strong built blonde wore a good size, diamond engagement ring on her tanned hand.
"It must be nice to be engaged to a good looking guy," I said with a twinge of envy.
"It takes a while - it's not that easy," she said as she winked at me.
"You will get there soon," she added. "Your sexy accent and nice personality in addition to your good looks - all work for you so you should be wearing something on your finger - soon."
"From your mouths to God's ears - I needed to hear something like that from a friend." All three of us laughed and wished that this summer would last forever. The summer breeze still felt and smelled good - sans the odor of the cow's manure - the "perfumes" of the farms when we pulled up in front of Annie's parents - white, big - ranch style home. After we knocked on the large front door - Annie opened it - looking radiant in her light and flowery - summer dress. We sat at the big dining room table and started to drink icy lemonade which tasted heavenly.
"Come on - we want to meet your new man," said Kristy and laughed. "That's why we drove two hours."
"Mother," Annie addressed her mom towards the room in the back whereupon her mother - a middle aged, strongly built, dark haired woman with an attractive thread of silver in her thick hair - came into the room carrying a fat, happy infant - maybe seven months old. The baby was blue eyed, clean and well taken care of - gurgling at the smiling faces suddenly surrounding him.
"He is my little man," said Annie with a special pride - as if having a baby was a super difficult task.
"I thought that you wanted to introduce us to a bigger man in your life," said Kristy tactfully - evidently not wanting to "interrogate" Annie.
"He works extra hours - he will be home late - we want to get our own place soon."
"Congratulations - your son is the cutest thing this world has ever seen. I am not exaggerating at all," I said as we were getting ready to leave.
On our way back we gossiped briefly regarding the fact that Annie must have been pregnant but not showing much when we last saw her close to a year before this visit. The sun was getting ready to set - it was a beginning of a lovely summer evening.
"Maybe she didn't know if her man was going to make a commitment or something," said Kristy.
"She didn't flash a fat engagement ring the way you do," I said with a laugh and all of us laughed.
* * *
The fall came early and quickly after that summer which was beautiful - not too hot. At the very end of August of that year - the temps cooled off and the days started smelling of autumn - earlier than normally. Jack Osborne and I met and hit it off - right away. He was finishing his U.S. Army duty so both of us could complete our college degrees at San Francisco State University which didn't require me to pass several required courses which I hated at Ohio State University. Jack and I were actually happy to leave Columbus, Ohio. We wanted to get to know San Francisco - however after finishing our education there - both of us were happy to get the hell out of there. We didn't like San Francisco for a lot of reasons. It's not that we were not impressed by it - at first. After living there for two years - we got to know it and didn't like what we saw. Jack got a job offer in Chicago so we were happy to go there.
* * *
It was a coincidence of sorts that two years after we got to San Francisco during the second part of December while the snowstorm raged in the Midwest which we were leaving - we were coming back to Midwest at almost the same time - two years later. Upon our approaching Chicago - the wind kicked up - as it almost always does around Chicago - while the big flakes of snow started to swish around without accumulating on the ground but landing on the trees and bushes surrounding our rental townhouse in Rogers Park - a northern neighborhood of the city. The snow flakes were soft, fat and each one had a different shape. I picked them up in my hand and they melted quickly. It was a fairy tale resembling scene since Jack and I missed snow while living in San Francisco which we never missed or had any excessive desire to visit - on the contrary - we were really happy - to unload it and forget about it.
We entered our rental townhouse - freshly remodeled so it smelled new. It was cozy and homey - furnished with the light Scandinavian Design style furniture which we rented with an option to purchase - just like our rental townhouse.
"We are really going to love Chicago," said Jack and gave me a hug. Both of us were hungry and tired but glad that we reached the city before the hard and icy snow started to fall.
Chapter 79
I always loved to stroll down Michigan Ave - by the Lake Michigan in Chicago which felt like one of the most glamorous and magnificent parts of the world and I was a part of it. We lived there for quite a few years and things were going very well for us for a very long time. After my short stint as a sales rep for a big cookie company - I opened my own deli/bakery where Jack and I developed a lot of beautiful products. We closed the business after several years because it started to require further expansion and investments which Jack didn't want to risk.
His job as a television news photographer for a big television station took him to many famous places and people in Chicago. His talent as a photographer grew but - in addition - he mastered the workings of the television camera. He loved his job and loved to go to work every day.
I - in the meantime - ran our a deli/bakery after quickly "learning the ropes" about managing the business. Jack and I developed many beautiful products. It was fun to open my business every morning and work there all day even if some days I had to put in a shift and a half since my employees at times didn't show up for work - looking for something better. Sometimes - I was overwhelmed and piled under many business problems - my customers' unfilled orders were my main worry. At times - it was hard to deal with the suppliers, employees, customers but things went smoothly a lot and that was tons of fun.
All this was putting a stress on our marriage. We decided to close the business and sell the equipment - recovering ten cents on a dollar of our hard earned - investments.
* * *
My "normal" job after closing our business felt easy. All I had to do was to show up and put in a good eight hour shift - then I could leave and not worry about any employee not showing up for work. Even though my job after we close our deli/bakery was easy - I missed running my business for a long time - notwithstanding various headaches connected with running the enterprise.
I missed the "hum" of our big flour grinder - "Big Daddy" - a magnificent Swiss design - Samap - which was electric but had stone blades which ensured great flour for our products - not overheated, old and dead - like most flours. Our kind of flour made our products look and taste - fantastic. In addition - they were satisfying even though we used healthy and not greasy - ingredients. Anybody can make a good cookie if they put tons of butter in it. Moreover - grinding our own flour gave our deli/bakery a terrific smell - better than the scent of bread being baked.
* * *
A year after Jack and I closed our deli/bakery - I went by there to see who opened some other business in our re-modeled professional looking space - which Jack and I paid to the contractors to equip with a costly - "hood" on the roof of that building - thus making it suitable for the restaurant or a bakery. The location became hot, hot, hot - in the middle of a - suddenly fashionable - neighborhood into which - all kinds of Chicago's construction companies - started to pour money like crazy since it was favorably zoned for the businesses and the apartments.
When I got closer to our ex-business - I noticed that the store front retained our old street number - prominently displayed in front - even though it underwent a lot of expansion inside. It was a restaurant now and since it was lunch time I walked in to look around. It was not overly busy yet - with a crowd of "yuppies" expected any minute.
"Hello," greeted me the middle aged, new owner. After I told him who I was he started to treat me like some kind of newly discovered - friendly and rich - relative. He suggested that I come back the next morning since he expected his lunch crowd to descend on the place any time. I couldn't wait till the next morning to talk to him - again. In the meantime - I entertained many thoughts of the regretful nature. I should have stuck to my "guns" and open a restaurant like this new owner. Now - he is "sitting on the goldmine" while I am out - looking inside.
When I showed up the next morning - the new owner told me that he "knew" my products when I had this commercial space so he suggested that I go into business with him and open my bakery in that space - "to enhance" his restaurant experience. The only minor thing would be that he expected me to invest - at least - half a million dollars - "to do it right" as he said. He also told me that when he bought and remodeled that building a year before - he had to invest close to a million dollars (he probably exaggerated a lot - wanting to impress me) - and he didn't know that this neighborhood will suddenly become the top "she-she-poo-poo" - fashionable part of Chicago.
I told Jack later that afternoon that we have made a big mistake by getting rid of our business. The neighborhood - in the meantime - came up, developed like crazy.
"Come on", said Jack and I could sense that he was thinking about some other things - like that he was never really interested in our business.
"Those youngsters down there - are a fickle bunch - you know how they will buy your products a few times - then they will find some other products they like more."
"All those new restaurants on that street are doing a booming business. If your product is good - there are always plenty of customers."
"I am not a restaurateur - I am not interested in any food businesses."
"You are always - mainly - interested in yourself".
"You should talk. 'A cattle called a pot' - black'".
His voice and demeanor came off in a sharp and distant manner - more than usually - in the last few months. His job situation changed and it caused an unexpected change in his personality - in spite of the fact that he was able to start his own business - producing and distributing his own videos for his numerous client base. Jack's new partner turned out to be honest, hardworking and effective. Jack - however - missed working in the news department - the way he did for the last ten years.
* * *
My older brother Max went through a stage when he constantly "proclaimed" that time will "grind" on all the couples - even the ones - madly in love. I started to believe it only when Jack and I came to the crossroads - "fork" - in our lives and we decided to "part our ways" after twenty years of - mostly happy - marriage. He would move out of Chicago which he always wanted to do - anyway - so he could take over our brand new townhouse in New York City area - while I would stay in Chicago in our remodeled townhouse which - in the meantime - came up in value. I was thinking of selling it while the market was favorable so I could move to hilly Pittsburgh and start me a "new life". My older brother Max and his family have always lived in Pittsburgh's - mountainous Squirrel Hill - where they owned a mini-mansion style - three unit dwelling. After Max divorced his second wife - he fully converted the two extra units - for rentals while he started to occupy the biggest apartment on the second floor. Even though - Squirrel Hill has always been the desirable place to own property - still - he has had an interesting "collection" of various types renting from him.
* * *
A super good summer of 2019 just ended - mainly because it was not overly hot. The gorgeous fall came quickly with the scent of fallen leaves in the air - at least two weeks before the Labor Day weekend. I have always liked the Labor Day since it means the all the kids are back in school - thank God.
When I lived in Chicago area - I liked to spend time in the nicely designed, park-like, Skokie mall - Old Orchard - which is gloriously decorated with plants, statutes and it lavishly changes the décor every season. However - during the summers the mall is always richly "infested" with tons of various, rowdy behaving little kids - all summer long - thus the Labor Day weekend - means - the return to normal, lovely Old Orchard - routine - until the following summer during which the kids will descend upon it - again.
* * *
The summer 2019 was a lot of fun but the fall - my favorite season - promises to be really good. I have always been interested in politics so I know that the elections of 2020 will be monumentally important for the future of the U.S.; the American Progressives/Socialists gained some traction in the Democratic Party - especially in view of the fact that - currently - in the halls of the U.S. Congress - "The Squad" - four Radical Socialists young ladies - the new congressional representatives from the Blue/Democratic states - appear to have "hijacked" the Democratic Party - for a while - anyway. Still - it's disgusting and stinks on ice. Come on - Leader Pelosi and other "normal" Democrats - it's about time to - finally - do something effective about "The Squad". Shame on you for "buckling under" to those four Radical Socialists!
I have made a promise to myself and God that I shall spread the word to anybody who will listen regarding the true nature of Socialism - under which I lived for many years; so I know "first hand" how this system is thoroughly disgusting, corrupting and just like cancer - destroys even the rich countries - like Venezuela and many, many others. If - God forbid - the U.S. would ever become a true Socialist country on the likes of China - China would appear like a proverbial "Sunday School" - comparing to how the U.S. would surpass China - in terms of being efficiently - repressive.
* * *
So far - the fall of 2019 promises to be great - the leaves are turning early - the temps are cool and sunny days plus cool mornings feel good. I like to pin a good size broach/American flag to my jean jackets which the various people who pass me in mostly blue/rich Democrat dominated - Squirrel Hill - immediately notice. Quite a few neighbors have American flags displayed in their yards and attached to their homes.
Sometimes the local Dems/Libs make various faces of "displeasure" upon - immediately - noticing a small, tastefully designed pin of American flag/broach - attached to my jean jackets. However - quite a few people give me a friendly smile - as well. It's a different kind of smile which I noted during this - coming soon, turbulent election season of 2020. Its the kind of smile that says something like - "I know that what you're doing is courageous - but - maybe - I will try it - soon - myself". I try not to be too happy about either approval as well as I don't feel bad about the occasional expressions of dislike - and even sometimes hatred - briefly appearing in their eyes - which disappears quickly - as well - "chased away" by my confident glance.
It's exciting and fun to "bone up" on many talking points which make the current Democratic presidential candidates exposed as Left leaning Socialistic Radicals wanting to "transform" this country - according to an ex-president Obama - thus making the federal government into a Divine ruler which the Radical/Dems/Socialists would direct - in order to control and suppress their opposition and people - below them - in general - so their power would be assured. Ayn Rand - a famous independent thinker and world-renowned - writer - called this strategy - "Collectivism" - the enemy of free mankind.
* * *
I consider Ayn Rand's American novels - "Fountainhead" and "Atlas Shrugged" - lasting masterpieces which are always accurately dealing with various, important aspects of the human condition. Even though she was widely vilified and severely criticized by many Leftists/Marxists and their adherents - her truthful observations withstand a test of time.
The movies based on her novels are also excellent plus several good pictures about her life capture her ideas regarding mankind - at times - "enslaved"- for a while - by oppressive economical systems like Socialism and his twin brother - Communism. I also read some exciting biographies dealing with her interesting and turbulent - life and loves.
In a nutshell - Ayn Rand barely escaped Russian Revolution as a teenager thus she witnessed first hand what a disaster Socialism has immediately become - to a rich country - like Tsarist Russia. Being interesting looking but not overly physically beautiful - still - she almost immediately - found work in Hollywood "behind the cameras" - as a script editor - upon her graduation Magna Cum Lade from the American university.
During her work on the set of the movie - she met and fell in love with an exceptionally handsome young actor who became a painter in his later years. They immediately got married and he became her life long husband. However - later in life - during her active work as an editor of her world famous journal - she fell madly in love with a much younger man - Jonathan Brandon who worked for her publications - read and distributed all over U.S. and abroad.
They became lovers for several years while her husband - allegedly - "gave her a permission" to carry on - since she didn't want to divorce him. At least - they were brave enough not to "sneak around" - with all the gossip columnists' collective tongues - hanging out - to print dirt about her and her lover. She was already world famous - celebrated writer - so she knew - first hand - all the trappings which come with global fame.
Long story - short - after several years - Jonathan cheated on her at first - then married his young lover. Ayn Rand was devastated for a while - then she found this experience - a source of deep reflections regarding the nature of love, betrayal, pain and recovery.
Chapter 80
Since I have always been interested in the U.S. and the global politics - I have been listening to various radio and TV commentators/TV and radio - talk show hosts. My favorite one - currently - being - Mark Levine who just published his latest non-fiction book - "The Unfreedom of the Press". His well documented examples of the current excerpts - published recently in the U.S. press plus the biased TV comments - effectively prove his case against the American Main Stream Media - accusing it of being a big propaganda tool for the American Democratic party - with its current agenda strongly leaning towards Radical/Socialist - legislative platforms - massively opposed by the majority of the American people.
I find Mark Levine extremely engaging during the three hours of his nightly radio talk show - especially when some nights he gets crazy callers/Liberals trying to deny his logical/legal arguments. I love how he takes them "apart". The only small "pet peeve" I have with Mark Levine nightly presentations is that - at times - he gets highly excited which make him raise his voice quite a bit. However - his various nicknames for many liberal Socialist leaning radio celebrities plus many pseudo-journalists/Lefties - are hilarious and always - on target.
Last year - 2018 - I used to listen to Michael Medved radio talk show - a lot. While he is extremely erudite and interesting to listen to - this year's sudden radio talk show star - Sebastian Gorka - who replaced him in this time slot - is exciting, involving and enormously - knowledgeable - about not only the U.S. politics, economics, current trends - but also about the global politics - as well. Michael Medved is also knowledgeable and delivers in an excellent manner - however - Dr. Gorka's "fire and emotional load" combined with his expert delivery - has a few equals among today's radio - "talkers". I could listen to him - forever.
Larry Elder has - also - had his - enormously successful radio talk show for many years - with his wacky, clever, funny and knowledgeable - daily, 3-hour long radio presentations steadily counting many millions listeners - kept mesmerized. I always like Fridays when his older brother Kirk - shares the mike with Larry. While Kirk is not a professional "talker" - he has a nice voice and his "street-smart" comments appeal to the listeners.
A lot of the listeners felt as if they called Larry and stayed with him for a while when they heard Kirk every Friday while Kirk was with Larry. Last Friday - I was crying. Mark a "talker" who subs for Larry some days - announced that we lost Kirk - on Fri. 13 - Sept. 2019. It was totally unexpected so Larry was away - of course. The whole three hours on that day - the listeners called and shared with Mark and the rest of the nation - their grief about loosing Kirk and how they will miss his voice - every Friday.
* * *
Since I have lived in this area of hilly Pittsburgh - twenty years - on and off - I have gotten to know some types who "circulate" here - in my part of town. Some come and go - some new ones - appear and disappear while quite a few - just take a bus and come to work here or simply "hang out" since this area has a really enticing and international - climate which attracts people.
There are a few steady types who never leave this area with some of them - usually behaving in an idiotic, loud, pushy and obnoxious manner which - naturally - gets on my nerves and on many other people's nerves - I am sure. If I don't see them on any given day - I consider it an extra nice day - so that day gets an extra "check" in my "be positive about various 'village idiots.'" - daily column.
I know for a fact that the most irritating individual has to be an older guy - loud, pushy, nasty and "screaming" for attention. He dresses like an idiot and - I can tell if I see him on the street - while I pretend to talk on the phone - to avoid giving him the second look - that he didn't take his medication on that day. I would never want to hurt him in any manner - but I don't need to associate with him - either - I am not a politician or a clergy person of any sort.
Another steady type which I prefer not to pass on the street - is a poor, fat old man - crawling around slowly with a walker. He looks unkempt and senile as he freely "breaks the wind" - not aware that people can hear him. I am sure that he is poor since he is always alone while if he was rich - there would be lots of "vultures" of every kind - surrounding him and tactfully waiting to put their "paws" on their inheritance.
* * *
My older brother Max and I have - finally - "straightened out" most of our old conflicts stemming from the fact that my biological father was Max's - stepfather. Naturally - he frequently felt that I was always treated better which was - usually - not true at all. He is ten years older than me - so for a long time - he had all kinds of "advantages" when we were kids. However - as we got older - things between us got reversed quite a bit - the balance of "power" got even out.
Even though - as Max gets older - his personality undergoes some positive changes - still - he has a big "Napoleonic" complex - he is a big "number one" to himself and to most people around him. He is honest and fair - most of the time - as is the rest of my family - still - I keep a little distance from them - including Max.
Sometimes I ponder about his perception of himself as I see him walking round this popular area of Pittsburgh as if he owns the place. He must look in the mirror to check upon his attire but evidently he sees nothing funny about wearing his sport socks very high combined with his Bermuda shorts - the combination which looks ridiculous. Our father used to do the same thing when he got old and he - stubbornly - ignored us when we pointed it out to him. Dad was a "bullheaded" old man and Max is getting more and more like him as he gets older. That's probably true about most men getting older - not that the older women are much different in that respect.
* * *
It's a very hot day - the last one of this summer - before the fall 2019 - officially begins. I am always glad when the summer is gone - for a lot of reasons but today - I was thinking about many beautiful summer days when the summer is still not getting bothersome. The classic Irwin Berlin tune - "Blue Skies" always reminds me of the lovely summer days which could last forever - not hot and humid - with the slight breeze in the air.
Even though I have always loved this song and heard many interpretations of it - with some of them - goofy and stupid - the best take on it which appeals to me the most - is the one by Willie Nelson - a talented vocalist, instrumentalist and song writer. His song "Crazy" which made Patsy Cline an international sensation - is also one of my most favorite ones; I never get tired of hearing it. However - when I listen to Willie Nelson - I prefer not to look at his face. Willie Nelson has had that "harsh", "hard living - galore" - look for many years now.
* * *
I am looking forward to each fall since I love the smell of falling leaves in the air - promising a beautiful Thanksgiving and winter holidays' season. Last autumn was sad in our pretty Squirrel Hill part of Pittsburgh - since a satanic maniac suddenly walked into a nicely designed Jewish temple during the Saturday, fall service - and shot dead eleven worshippers. We live in a dangerous world in which "the devil like - beings" - cause all kinds of carnage - but this world is also full of God's - heroes. I will never forget the first responders running into a "shower" of bullets to save people's lives.
I remember when I lived in Chicago and my ex-husband - Jack worked as a cameramen in the news department of a big Chicago TV station - they had a female reporter there who always loved to report on crimes - so her co-workers generously gave her all kinds of gruesome nicknames - behind her back. However - after a few years of doing that - she underwent a drastic "positive metamorphoses" - lost weight and wrote a successful non-fiction book on "how to turn your life into a positive experience."
This fall of 2019 - promises to be extra defining and good and it's almost here. Every year - it goes entirely too fast - however this one might a bit. I heard the commentator on the radio this morning stating that the U.S. House of Representatives will vote to impeach President Trump - right before the Thanksgiving. The Dems are losing - big time - so they are desperate to the max. They will still loose massively - 2020 Presidential elections.
Normally the winter holidays following the fall are a lot of fun - as well - until February of each year. That shortest month of the year - "never ends" even if it's a shortest month of the year. I vividly recall one hellishly hot summer followed by a glorious fall - quite a few years back. That summer started "normal" but as the season progressed - it became unusually hot, humid and bothersome to the max. It seemed that it would never end - even the people who normally like the hot summers - had that one - "coming out of their nostrils". When the fall of that year - finally arrived - it felt like a real paradise.
* * *
Since the summer has always been my least favorite season - my trips to Israel were always planned to avoid their summers which are enormously hot while the rest of the seasons in Israel - are lovely like the country - itself. It has a lot of problems - for sure - but so does every country on the face of this Earth.
I can't explain the deep love and connection I have always felt for Israel - ever since I can remember. I am certain that it has to do with my father always talking about it with love and affection bordering on idolatry. I have been trying to learn Hebrew which I find enormously - difficult. I do know that when the time is right - some important stuff starts happening in my life as if - the events have their own course to follow - no matter what I will decide. I am certain that it has to do a lot with Israel.
* * *
During that memorable, early spring visit in Israel - my second one - my sister and I visited her lawyer - an older lady who has the office in Jerusalem - thus we travelled from Haifa - where my Israeli family has always lived - to Jerusalem - on a fast train. We tried to establish our potential legal claim for some compensation which was still paid out by the German government - to the victims of Holocaust or their immediate - descendants .
When we stopped to get some documents at the Yad Vashem Holocaust Center - the clerk who issued them quickly - has informed us - even though we didn't ask for that piece of his "knowledge" - that several relatives have already requested those documents. My sister - who always has an answer to various kinds of idiots - made a comment in her almost flawless - Hebrew which "got where it needed" - judging by the expression on the clerk's face. We both laughed - even though I didn't understand her exactly - I knew that what she said - needed to be said.
* * *
I will never forget the morning when I landed in Israel's - LOD - airport for the second time - about a year after my first trip there. The flight on El-Al was good - as always - but after I landed - my sister and her family expected me at the airport in front of their tan colored Mercedes. They looked like a bunch of movie stars - smiling and glamorous.
She and I talked a lot many evenings about my goals for the immediate and a bit distant - future since I started my "new life" without Jack in the middle of my life. I felt that I had a purpose and a goal - leading me ahead - which were strongly connected with Israel so for the next few years which were hard - but not really, really hard - thank God - everything that happened to me was filtered through the prism of my Israeli destiny.
* * *
The years went by - some were better than others during which I have moved back and forth - from Pittsburgh's Squirrel Hill back to Chicago - several times - looking for something - I am not sure exactly - what. The last time I moved back to Pittsburgh - from Chicago - a couple of years ago - I became convinced that the Democrats running this - once beautiful Chicago - are not doing a good job at all; I am being extremely generous to the key power players of Chicago.
Long story - short - I have been in Pittsburgh's Squirrel Hill for the last couple of years and Chicago became the least priority for me to think about - even if at one time - the city was important to me. I can easily compare how - for now - Pittsburgh manages its affairs as compared to a growing mess in Chicago while the state of California - run by the Democrats - especially its coastal cities are poorly dealing with their hard problems - stemming from the gross mismanagement of their resources.
Chapter 81
The last time I voted in presidential elections of 2016 - in Chicago - the voting places there - didn't even try to hide the fact that they already had "phony" ballots ready to "load" for Hillary Clinton but - God and higher destiny - had other plans. The next morning after the elections - I saw some misguided young women - crying over Ms. Clinton's loss. I heard a lot of people making comments to the effect of: "You would be crying hard if she got elected - she already sold this country down the river by selling uranium to Russia and other corrupt things the Clintons did - galore." All the corruptions always comes to the surface - unfortunately - sometimes - it takes a long time.
I have simplified my "new life" - which I started in Pittsburgh - recently - for the third time. Every day is a new adventure and I strongly appreciate each new day and new week. I made a strong promise to myself to do all I can - but some days - even a minor stuff - to make sure that the U.S. stays a constitutional republic because - currently - quite a lot of misguided youngsters seem to want Socialism. I know for a fact and after living under Socialism that it destroys and corrupts all the social orders and societies.
Pittsburgh's - Squirrel Hill is full of Democrats who - recently - got "hijacked" by their various factions of their hateful - Socialists/Globalists groups who openly advocate for "shredding of the constitution, grabbing political power, opening all the borders which would flood the U.S. with tons of illegals - thus the U.S. would cease to be a separate country"; they aim at a huge central government - so they can easily control the population - just like China does.
Anyway - I do certain things three times per week while twice a week - I have a different schedule. That way - I don't need to be seeing the same people too much. It's not that I don't like Squirrel Hill - it's a beautiful part of town - however - I have always believed in keeping my distance from a lot of people until I find out that they are solid and trustworthy - all the three of them in this city of a third of a million. I am just kidding - I have always believed that most people are honest, kind and decent.
On Mondays - Wednesdays and Fridays I like to stop in the mornings - for a coffee and a croissant at the totally "she-she-poo-poo", elegant, trendy and somewhat pretentious new French bakery. I like to chat with the sales people there about their pricey products which look good - no question about it - especially their sweets which have good looks but most of them don't taste nearly as good as they look. They don't have almost any selection of breads and buns. I had a bake shop in Chicago for several years while my ex-husband knew a lot about making superior breads which looked glorious as well - so - consequently - I am also familiar with all the trade secrets concerning making the best breads - on this side of "mighty Mississippi".
* * *
Yesterday - I saw for the second time - an hour and a half documentary which received numerous praises and awards - for excellence and most deservedly - so. I couldn't take my eyes of my TV screen - for the whole hour and a half while it was running - just like during the first time I saw it - six months earlier. I think they show it twice per year - to coincide with the two major Jewish holidays - the Passover and the Rosh Hashana (the Jewish New Year).
It consists of mostly - narration by Sam Willinger - an old man/first hand witness to Nazis' atrocities - interwoven by the gruesome, true documentary clips - relating how - the Germans progressed in their "killing techniques" of mainly the Jews but also the Gypsies, homosexuals and the opposition to their Nazi regime - during the Second World War. Evidently the truth - cuts like knife in butter - into various propaganda - lies - not matter how skillfully delivered by most powerful propaganda machines.
The ironic fragment of this documentary -has an explanation of his actions by the Nazis' - "unsung hero" - the main commander of Treblinka (one of their death camps) - Franz Stengl - nicknamed "White Death" by the prisoners. He explained that he committed all his atrocities at the direction of his higher command (flimsy excuse) - as he set in jail awaiting his sentence at the end of the War - but it caused him to feel - "sadness" - no kidding. The directing, improving and executing - the death, torture, imprisonment of a million innocent humans caused "sadness" in the main executioner. What a shame!
Yom Kippur is a Jewish holiday which emphasizes - renewal, forgiveness, continuation of life - thus this documentary ends with Sam Willinger's only daughter - helping him design a German embassy in Jerusalem. After the Second World War - once the German Socialists were beaten to the "pulp" - Germany turned around and did a world of good for Israel and other "wronged parties". It's a shame that millions of people had to die and suffer - first. China is currently doing their "Socialist" practices by killing their opposition to the government.
Sam Willinger's only daughter - Orit Willinger-Galati (Orit - the luminous one - Hebrew translation of her name) was born in Israel after he started his new life there - following his miraculous escape from the death camp; he was one of 19 escaping - out of a million imprisoned and executed there.
Orit Willinger-Galati became a prominent architect and helped Sam Willinger design a new German embassy in Jerusalem after he was asked to do it - by new German government. Thus the Yom Kippur's eternal tenants of repentance, forgiveness and renewal - are the universal truth. It's a shame that a lot of people have to die - first.
* * *
The elections coming up in 2020 will be defining and very important. The U.S. Democrats got "hijacked" by their Radical/Socialist/Globalist - factions and they want Socialism in the U.S. That's - mainly happening in three big U.S. coastal states - California, New York and in the middle of the U.S. - Illinois (Chicago) - with the rest of Illinois not that Democratic/Radical. Those areas are definitely - Blue/Democratic/Socialist. The rest of the country - finds Socialism - repulsive. Some states close to the Eastern/Coastal Democrats/Socialists/Radicals - are "bleeding" Blue/Democrat - a bit - like Pennsylvania.
I have always loved the fall season then the beginning of the winter is also nice - right through the New Year - every year. If the winter is harsh - like a lot of them - in Chicago - then by the end of February - people can't wait till the spring. At times - the spring has a lot of hot, bothersome summer days - which I have always - despised.
This fall of 2019 is shaping up to be most defining, important and fun. So far the leaves are not changing too much - yet - but soon - the colors will be super. It took me many years of living and experiencing various passages - to realize that nothing is "guaranteed" to last more than a certain time without changing. It - frequently - changes from good to even better. At times - however - the changes are harsh - but - frequently - the changes are for the best - in the long run. Good times - go fast - but bad times - don't have to linger - especially if people are doing the best they can - to get out of their hole.
* * *
I have always liked to be around fun and optimistic people - as much as possible but people come and go. As I cross various thresholds - I always look ahead and quickly open "the next door" since looking back and "crying over spilled milk" is not my style and is an enormous waste of time and energy.
I always wonder why the worst of times - frequently coincide with the best of times which - usually - follow. I remember one fall and winter quite a while ago when everything seemed to "fall in place" for mine and Jack's lives. His job situation became semi-permanent - if anything could really be permanent. He liked his job and looked forward to going to work every day. I liked our new condo while my job was also fun and easy. Things could not be better for both of us. If anybody told me then that Jack and I will be divorcing at some time in the future - I would never have expected that.
It's kind of good that God or whatever other force strongly influencing our lives - does not gives any advance "notifications" of the important events to come. The important happenings - normally - come - unexpected - "out of the blue".
I will never forget one autumn as long as I live. Everything was finally falling in place for me and Jack after he received a permanent position at his job which he loved - that it - chasing the currently happening news with his - first class, the latest Japanese model television camera. He worked for a top Chicago television station while the management seemed to appreciate his excellent work.
* * *
That memorable fall morning started out normally. I got dressed, had a light breakfast and drove my small "Jetta" to my routine appointment with a new gynecologist - highly recommended by a friend at work. While I needed a check up since I have not had one for several years - there was nothing wrong with me - or so I thought.
For the next segment of this exciting story - click here - every Monday, Wednesday and Friday!
"He is a good looking and smart guy. It didn't take you long to make such a quality friend. Evidently, he has enough money - as well. Now - you need to see to it that he gives you an engagement ring; you got to move fast, though - you might have some younger competition," she suggested jokingly and that got on my nerves a lot in addition to her stupid behavior all morning.
"It's not the first priority in my life. I can feel good about myself without necessarily having a man by my side. I had a great man for many years and that's ended. Now I have a new life - with or without a man by me."
* * *
After I came back to the U.S. following that memorable Israeli trip - I thought about Yoni - some. He called me in Chicago several times and invited me to Florida where he had his second home, but he kept postponing his visiting Chicago (my suggestion) - so I got the message; he lost his original interest in me; he didn't need to draw me a diagram about it. I made my decision - again - that Israel and my connection to it (not really clear to me but strong all my life) - is more important than the man by my side - whereas if I was younger and less "seasoned" - having a man by me side - would be "an alpha and omega" style goal for my life.
Chapter 77
That year went by without any major drama event - thank God - then the following summer appeared. It was an important year since I left Chicago for the third (final) time and moved back to hilly Pittsburgh for the third time - where my oldest brother Max has always lived with his family in Pittsburgh's lovely, international Squirrel Hill - always richly "infested" by wealthy Democrats/Liberals many of them - on the verge of being Socialists.
Those rich Liberals/Socialists delude themselves with the ideas that they will always be safe under Socialism while they ignore the historical facts attesting to the fact that the big Government - the big God of Socialism - always finds ways to "divest" rich people from their money and send them to jails. God forbid if they have to learn the hard way in the U.S. where they have the Socialists - currently - attempt to grab power. They call themselves different names - this election cycle 2020 - they call themselves Democratic Socialists.
I and many other people - firmly believe that the Divine Providence will tip the scales to get rid of the Socialists - but people have to act and they shall. Socialism is like a mythical Hydra snake who has many hissing heads with the new one re-appearing just as soon as one is cut off. They will all be cut off - at once - so the Hydra will slither and die for a while and die in grass - still - this Evil will be at bay - only - it will not disappear for a long time. We shall be vigilant!
* * *
When my sister Tina came from Israel to visit me in Chicago - I was already in quite a decent shape financially and otherwise. The worst was over for me - still - I considered myself lucky that it was not worse circumstances I had to go through. She left me a beautiful photo of her with her Israeli family. She bragged about her life in Israel to no end. It did get on my nerves at times occasions but her visit gave me a goal and a direction which I needed at that time.
Before she left to go back to Israel she hugged me and said, "We - all of us on this photo - will take shape of some kind of angels so you will be protected until you are ready to come to join us - in Israel." I missed her frequently after she left but then the events of my everyday living started to blur her and my future project to leave Chicago permanently.
At that time I was close to Millie - my childhood friend who gave me a poster of a beautiful woman with wings one day and my life started to change for the better in an accelerated manner. I hung it in my bedroom and early each day before I left for work after I recited my short morning prayer - I always glanced at "my" angel/poster on the wall - who at times - seemed real. I had a vague idea that the angels exist in some other reality with different levels for them and they influence the events of our lives. Sometimes things happen as if they were meant to happen.
One morning before I left Chicago - for my first time move to Pittsburgh's hilly Squirrel Hill - our oldest brother Max's "beloved corner" - I found a beautifully published and edited book about the angels. It felt good to touch the smooth, silky pages as I looked through it, but I put it away somewhere and forgot about it for several years - during which I made two subsequent moves back and forth - from Chicago to Pittsburgh and back. I found that "angels" book again several years after I moved back to Pittsburgh for the third time. It was easy to discover that upon putting some daily notes into the pages portraying different angels - something positive always happened.
One time - my best, closest friend and confidante at that time - Millie - asked me briefly about my weekly columns which she read sometimes but rarely if ever -complemented me. By that time - I was used to receiving either praise or contempt - for "my take on the weekly news" - my weekly column which became popular. I knew to be prepared to do something else after that "gig" came to an end. In the interim - it was a lot of fun for a lot of reasons.
"You know that the your 'printed word' every week has a tremendous power to hurt people," she said as if she discovered America all over again.
"Smart people are judicious if given an opportunity to express their opinions which other people read or talk about - that is if they have a 'megaphone' for a while - but they know well that it's a double edge sword. However - they can't be scared to tell the truth which may hurt - at times."
Millie and I were close friends for a long time with her always weighing her words carefully. At times - however - she indulged in the unfair, severe criticism of me which I respected because - at least - she did it openly - not trying to do it behind my back. Eventually - however - our respective "roads" - "forked" as it went into two opposite directions. After I left Chicago - for the third time I didn't hear from her and her family.
When I arrived in Pittsburgh's hilly Squirrel Hill - I realized that after my last "stint" in Chicago for a year - I came to realization that I much prefer Squirrel Hill for a lot of reasons. Chicago became difficult to navigate unless one had tons of money - so far - there are lots of those people there. As a middle income individual - I found Chicago too crowded with tons of poor people of various nationalities - with nothing special for them to do but wait for some unrest - Chicago quickly became a typical big city - run by the Democrats in 2020 - interested in "harvesting" the votes from the illegals of every kind. Most Dems live in their luxurious, gated residences away from all the illegal elements.
Pittsburgh is still "normal" - in a way that most people here - especially - here - in Squirrel Hill have a reason to be here. They either live here or study in the near by universities whereas Chicago became too crowded with various semi-criminal elements and mental cases - of every imaginable sort and nationality.
The public transportation and the streets of Chicago are full of various people who don't belong there. The local Dems - mismanaging that city - need them to vote - illegally - for them. I am not even mentioning the crime and the gangs' situation always plaguing this city and not getting any better. They also have a lot of financial problems with their pensions severely underfunded and taxes going up like crazy. Chicago used to be "one of the loves of my life" - but not anymore. I don't miss it most of the time - even if - I am looking forward to passing through it quickly - on my way to Israel - before long. I - sometimes - wonder - why I was so eager to go back there - in the first place. There had to be a hidden reason for it - but - still it's very good - not to be there.
I try to think positive about it and most of the time - I remember tons of good times I had in Chicago. The memorable quote from the Bible comes to my mind - "There is a time and season for every matter under the Sun."
* * *
This - current - summer of 2019 has been glorious; we will keep it that way; so far - so good - notwithstanding a nasty but short - heat wave which passed - like everything passes - and - for certain - it was one of the very last nasty spells for the season. I can hardly wait for the fall even if I remember lyrics to the lovely song I heard several summers ago which go something like - "Every summer is like a mini life."
Sometimes I think about various nice summers which I can remember and the best moments of them are always associated with some hit summers songs for that season. One crucial and defining - sunny and glorious - summer - quite a few years back - is always magically brought back to me - when I hear Frank Sinatra's big hit - "Strangers in the Night". I still don't get tired of hearing it - whereas other summer hits - when I hear them now - are like a tired old "something" which is no longer valid or interesting. Time to move on - let's get some new, fresh "elements" going!
However my most memorable summer of which I think with fondness - is our first summer in the U.S. I remember the spring - preceding it - felt wonderful when we arrived in the U.S. in May of that year - with our first apartment appearing like a penthouse - however - when the unexpected summer heat waves came upon us - the golden fall which followed felt like a paradise. The big musical hit song of that summer was a fabulous Elvis Presley's re-make of an old song - "I Was Crying in the Chapel."
During the following summer - we already lived close to the Ohio State University - huge campus. My parents worked for the university as research assistants/translators while I started my freshman year there in the department of International Studies. It was hard for my folks to get a decent job in spite of their vast qualifications. Without the connections - their middle age worked against them - however - they never gave up and finally found a decent job but it was a rough going for them - at first.
That second summer was a lovely one - but the one after that was a lot nicer. Almost every day I drove the blue Rambler - our family car - to the local JCC pool where I quickly made some friends my age who also studied at O.S.U. Most of them were nice and "normal" but some kids were snobs. They - evidently - derived their status symbol from the fact that they were born in the U.S. thus they thought they can look down on the immigrants who came to this country and had to "learn" the U.S. - ways.
I liked to "set them straight" about those matters and other things in terms of "enlightening" them that most of the Nobel prizes which improve the life in the U.S. were gotten by the immigrants who came to the U.S. in search of better life. It was a great summer - almost every day at the pool - full of various types to observe. Some - funny acting - middle aged men thought that they had a chance to ask a college girl for a date. Sometimes - men act like idiots.
The Coca-Cola with ice in the plastic cups tasted extra-ordinarily good with the hamburgers after swimming laps in the pool which smelled quite a bit of chlorine and the summer sun - the blue pool water always gleamed - reflecting the sun but - even if some little kids peed in it. The big musical hit that summer was Peggy Lee remake of "The More I See You - the More I Love You." I wished that summer lasted forever but at the end of it - Lizotchka - my childhood friend - invited me to spend the last week of August at her parents' lovely ranch - just before the new academic year was to start at Ohio State University. Her folks lived for many years in their ranch style, spacious house - in Dayton, Ohio - a small town close to Ohio State University's - home - Columbus, Ohio. They also went through some rough times at first - but after some difficult times - have done really well for themselves and their families.
* * *
The first morning when I woke up early at Lizotchka's parents' house at the very end of that memorable summer - I heard a muffled sounds of the musical hit that summer - a song titled "Sunrise - Sunset" since "Fiddler on the Roof" was a sensation on all the major musical theatre scenes - all over the world. Lizotchka was still asleep in her "old" room still full of her little girl's stuff - even though she was away at college.
I got up from my big sofa of her parents' spacious living room and followed the sound of "Sunrise - Sunset" which was coming from the finished basement which looked like a mini apartment with a clean kitchen, shower and a big studio style room. The soft carpet caressed my bare feet. The house smelled of luxury and cleanliness.
Lizotchka's mother - a middle aged brunette - still beautiful - was squeezing fresh orange juice for breakfast - at the high kitchen counter of their small basement unit; the freshly squeezed orange juice smelled heavenly and tasted like Gods' - nectar. I have not seen her for ten years but she still looked very good since she hardly changed in ten years. The same was true about her husband - Lizotchka's handsome - dad.
"What's the matter - Maratchka - you can't sleep in a new place?"
"No, Mrs. Levinsky - I slept great like at home. I love your house. It looks and smells - brand new."
"Your parents bought a nice house - as well."
"It was very hard for them - at first."
"It was difficult for us - too. Nobody is rolling out any 'red carpets' and 'orchestras' of any sort - when you first arrive in this country. The U.S. will 'put you through the wringer' - at first."
After eating a delicious breakfast consisting of vegetable and cheese omelet - made expertly by her - attractive and fun to be around - father - Lizotchka and I stepped out to the Levinsky's back yard covered with lush, green grass. The transistor radio played another hit of that summer "You Got Your Troubles - I Got Mine."
"Your engagement ring looks huge - I bet it attracts a lot of comments of every imaginable kind," I touched her tanned hand. The sun was kissing our muscular, young bodies.
"You need to 'hustle up' one - as well. It's not always easy but you are always 'a go getter'," she laughed an easy laugh of a careless summer.
"It didn't take you long to 'rope' Artie Trotman. But I thought that the American Jews look down upon us - 'the newcomers'".
"I can't believe I hear you speak that way. What's with your customary self-confidence?"
"It's easy for you to say - you always look like a movie star - ever since you were little."
"I can't believe what I hear from you - you who always walks around like you own the Earth - ever since you were little."
* * *
That week at Lizotchka's parents house - went like a blink of an eye. The next time I was at their house was a month later at Lizotchka's wedding to Artie Trotman. They decided to leave the U.S. for a while - for Canada until the Vietnam War would end.
In the meantime - while my father was visiting Israel where my oldest sister - Tina has lived permanently and loved it - he was - allegedly - prayed at the Jerusalem wailing wall so I would get "engaged" or something - since my best friend - Lizotchka - looked liked Princess Grace - walking down the isle in her lovely wedding dress. Shortly after that - I met Jack Osborne and we did get engaged quickly while he was finishing his U.S. Army duty. He was not Jewish but - at least - a part of my father's prayer - got answered - right away.
Chapter 78
The following summer was different - but also defining since it was my first summer in northern California where Jack and I - settled for a few years where we finished our respective college education. The colleges were less expensive there so Jack and I moved there for a while - upon his completing his U.S. army duty.
Ten years ago San Francisco was still - a beautiful city - as far as its physical looks are concerned. Even though it had a lot of big problems - even then since it was managed by - mostly - Liberal Democrats - still - it was not as badly infected by mentally ill/homeless/criminal elements - the way it is now. Jack and I were happy to get the hell out of there after we completed our respective college degrees.
As soon as he got a job offer in Chicago - we were happy to go back towards Midwest - which was "normal" comparing to Northern California which both of us - grew to hate - for a lot of reasons. On the way back we stopped in Reno, Nevada which both - Jack and I - loved; Reno is a charming, picturesque and hilly town but neither one of us could get even a "hint" of any jobs - there; we were happy to head back to Chicago - anyway. Jack's childhood friend - a dentist - was lucky to have established his clientele in a short time. He always said that the Californians are "prunies" which means that their brains are totally dried up by the sun.
* * *
When we first arrived in Chicago - I immediately fell in love with the city and its rich history which was reflected in its international spirit and grandeur - now - however - Chicago deteriorated quite a bit and even though it's still beautiful in some areas - if one has enough money to live there. The Democrats dominating the city - and Catholic Church as well - want to open the city - even more - totally - to the influx of all kinds of illegals - thus the Dems get their "fresh voters" - legal or not - to keep themselves in power - in perpetuity - since they got rid of most Republicans in Chicago area. The city of Chicago is "hemorrhaging" tons of valuable people - who get the hell out in a hurry - due to high taxes of every kind which "kill" them - financially.
In the meantime - the city is stressed financially to the max - according to Chicago's commentators - and is teetering on the verge of bankruptcy - due to tons of underfunded - pensions' funds - as well - almost ready to collapse - if the Chicago politicians continue in this insane mode.
* * *
I vividly remember one Chicago summer which was terribly hot and bothersome - but the following summer turned out cool and pleasant. It felt wonderful to wake up most mornings to a fresh, new day without any heat waves in a forecast. Jack's friends from work - frequently had summer parties with the delicious hamburgers and sausages (Polish sausages - Chicago style) - smoked on the outside grills. Those care free summer evenings were a lot of fun with the food tasting good and the cold beer - tasting even better - like a heavenly nectar of beautiful summer nights.
The following summer - a lot of big changes came to the Chicago TV station where Jack successfully worked for several years and loved his job. The Capital Cities bought the ABC's Chicago's subsidiary and at first - the new owners were not "tightening up the belt" too much - they were even spending some money. Later - however - the Cap Cities started to "tighten up" - the screws - in terms of "cutting the personnel" - so the skeletal news crews had to a lot of extra stressful work - to "pick up the slack".
Long story short - after several years of "the upper management's maneuvers" at Jack's TV station - his position was almost eliminated. He took it harder than other people in similar circumstances in spite of the fact that this drastic change allowed him to sufficiently develop his own enterprises which he started on a part-time bases while still employed at ABC.
Jack and I - but mainly - I - faced a new, big "fork" in our respective futures; we were heading for divorce. While he was generating enough income to continue his middle class lifestyle - I needed to - quickly - get some saleable skills - to support myself. Thank God - it all worked out very well for me - but it was a rough passage. Still - thank God - it wasn't worse.
* * *
The memorable summer for me - was our last summer in Poland before we left for the U.S. I became friends with a teenage girl named Halinka who was several years younger than me. Her older sister was a few years older than me and she was the main topic of most of our conversation since Ella just got engaged with a guy who came back from New York City with tons of complaints regarding what kind of treatment he received as a new immigrant - when he worked there briefly with no knowledge of English. He "sharpened up" his English and Ella and he decided to go to Montreal, Canada - to try their luck there.
I vaguely knew that couple and they seemed totally mismatched in the way they looked - but upon returning from New York City - her sister's fiancée brought a hit record by Bobby Rydell - titled "Sway". We listened to it many times that summer and the fabulous musical arrangement of it including his vocals - sounded great. I pictured the U.S. in the best possible way - listening to this hit. I couldn't wait to get there and start my new life.
That summer was very nice - though. My head was full of dreams of U.S. and how our lives will change - in the meantime - Halinka and I hung out together most of my family's last summer in Poland; we constantly played "Sway" - I never got tired of it - even till today.
Whenever I hear "Sway" - that last summer in Poland feels close.
Halinka always told me lots of different kinds of stories. She liked to gossip about the people we knew - in a humorous manner - she didn't say mean things or anything like that but she was funny. She never broached the subject of her parents who were both attractive looking with were many wild rumors circulating regarding her handsome father carrying on with his ugly looking and old - secretary. He was a Communist Party hack - so they had an extra luxurious, big, two level, soft loft style - apartment and lots of nice things. My father never joined the Communist Party since he always hated the Communists - still - my family also lived well in Poland. At the end of that summer - I knew that I will miss that last summer with my friends but the exciting vision of my new life in the U.S. - made me think of the next summer in the U.S.
* * *
My first summer in the U.S. began in a glorious manner with the weather being beautiful and everything going super good during the first part of it - however - when the first heat waves appeared - I started to wait for the fall. After it arrived in her golden splendor - ever since that time - I always wait for autumn because the summer starts getting on my nerves - big time - at the very end of it - every summer like a "clockwork".
That summer was actually hard in some ways since I had to go to summer school that year to polish up my English so I could start Ohio State University in the fall. The following summer - however - was tons of fun from the beginning to an end. I was done with the first year at O.S.U. - the worst was over for quite a while. My new friends at Ohio State have shared with me a lot of the tips - regarding how to survive that first year since they also came from another country. Various short-cuts come handy.
* * *
My second summer in the U.S. after I finished my first year at Ohio State University was one of the nicest I can remember. Almost every morning I drove our first family car - a blue Rambler to the JCC - pool which was big and well maintained. The sound system played nice tunes - the hits of that summer; I remember some of them till today. Peggy Lee had a hit - "The More I See You - the More I Love You". The new friends I made at the pool that summer - were the upper classmen at Ohio State and most of them were nice and friendly while several of them had an "attitude" at first - until my friend and I "straightened" them out regarding how not to be "stuck up" about their attributes which they - evidently - considered to make them better than other people.
* * *
During the following summer - I already finished my second year at Ohio State University taking a lot of courses which interested me so I could declare my major as International Studies but several required courses gave me problems at that time so I avoided them hoping to get "around" them.
At the end of that summer - my requirements problem got solved in a way which I never expected. During that summer - my two girlfriends and I drove around and had fun. We listened over and over to the hit of that summer by the Grass
* * *
One beautiful, late summer morning during that summer which I call the summer of Grass Roots hit - "Living for Today" - two of my girlfriends and I drove out of town to visit our third friend - Annie who invited us to "introduce us to a new man in her life". We have not seen her for a year.
The three of us drove out of town towards Westerville - the middle class suburb of Columbus, Ohio. We played "Living for Today" over and over as we laughed the careless laugh of a beautiful summer. The summery scenery looked lush and fresh so we opened the car windows to enjoy the breeze before we got into the farms' area where the breeze would mingle with the smell of cows' manure.
Kristy - the blond haired, strong built blonde wore a good size, diamond engagement ring on her tanned hand.
"It must be nice to be engaged to a good looking guy," I said with a twinge of envy.
"It takes a while - it's not that easy," she said as she winked at me.
"You will get there soon," she added. "Your sexy accent and nice personality in addition to your good looks - all work for you so you should be wearing something on your finger - soon."
"From your mouths to God's ears - I needed to hear something like that from a friend." All three of us laughed and wished that this summer would last forever. The summer breeze still felt and smelled good - sans the odor of the cow's manure - the "perfumes" of the farms when we pulled up in front of Annie's parents - white, big - ranch style home. After we knocked on the large front door - Annie opened it - looking radiant in her light and flowery - summer dress. We sat at the big dining room table and started to drink icy lemonade which tasted heavenly.
"Come on - we want to meet your new man," said Kristy and laughed. "That's why we drove two hours."
"Mother," Annie addressed her mom towards the room in the back whereupon her mother - a middle aged, strongly built, dark haired woman with an attractive thread of silver in her thick hair - came into the room carrying a fat, happy infant - maybe seven months old. The baby was blue eyed, clean and well taken care of - gurgling at the smiling faces suddenly surrounding him.
"He is my little man," said Annie with a special pride - as if having a baby was a super difficult task.
"I thought that you wanted to introduce us to a bigger man in your life," said Kristy tactfully - evidently not wanting to "interrogate" Annie.
"He works extra hours - he will be home late - we want to get our own place soon."
"Congratulations - your son is the cutest thing this world has ever seen. I am not exaggerating at all," I said as we were getting ready to leave.
On our way back we gossiped briefly regarding the fact that Annie must have been pregnant but not showing much when we last saw her close to a year before this visit. The sun was getting ready to set - it was a beginning of a lovely summer evening.
"Maybe she didn't know if her man was going to make a commitment or something," said Kristy.
"She didn't flash a fat engagement ring the way you do," I said with a laugh and all of us laughed.
* * *
The fall came early and quickly after that summer which was beautiful - not too hot. At the very end of August of that year - the temps cooled off and the days started smelling of autumn - earlier than normally. Jack Osborne and I met and hit it off - right away. He was finishing his U.S. Army duty so both of us could complete our college degrees at San Francisco State University which didn't require me to pass several required courses which I hated at Ohio State University. Jack and I were actually happy to leave Columbus, Ohio. We wanted to get to know San Francisco - however after finishing our education there - both of us were happy to get the hell out of there. We didn't like San Francisco for a lot of reasons. It's not that we were not impressed by it - at first. After living there for two years - we got to know it and didn't like what we saw. Jack got a job offer in Chicago so we were happy to go there.
* * *
It was a coincidence of sorts that two years after we got to San Francisco during the second part of December while the snowstorm raged in the Midwest which we were leaving - we were coming back to Midwest at almost the same time - two years later. Upon our approaching Chicago - the wind kicked up - as it almost always does around Chicago - while the big flakes of snow started to swish around without accumulating on the ground but landing on the trees and bushes surrounding our rental townhouse in Rogers Park - a northern neighborhood of the city. The snow flakes were soft, fat and each one had a different shape. I picked them up in my hand and they melted quickly. It was a fairy tale resembling scene since Jack and I missed snow while living in San Francisco which we never missed or had any excessive desire to visit - on the contrary - we were really happy - to unload it and forget about it.
We entered our rental townhouse - freshly remodeled so it smelled new. It was cozy and homey - furnished with the light Scandinavian Design style furniture which we rented with an option to purchase - just like our rental townhouse.
"We are really going to love Chicago," said Jack and gave me a hug. Both of us were hungry and tired but glad that we reached the city before the hard and icy snow started to fall.
Chapter 79
I always loved to stroll down Michigan Ave - by the Lake Michigan in Chicago which felt like one of the most glamorous and magnificent parts of the world and I was a part of it. We lived there for quite a few years and things were going very well for us for a very long time. After my short stint as a sales rep for a big cookie company - I opened my own deli/bakery where Jack and I developed a lot of beautiful products. We closed the business after several years because it started to require further expansion and investments which Jack didn't want to risk.
His job as a television news photographer for a big television station took him to many famous places and people in Chicago. His talent as a photographer grew but - in addition - he mastered the workings of the television camera. He loved his job and loved to go to work every day.
I - in the meantime - ran our a deli/bakery after quickly "learning the ropes" about managing the business. Jack and I developed many beautiful products. It was fun to open my business every morning and work there all day even if some days I had to put in a shift and a half since my employees at times didn't show up for work - looking for something better. Sometimes - I was overwhelmed and piled under many business problems - my customers' unfilled orders were my main worry. At times - it was hard to deal with the suppliers, employees, customers but things went smoothly a lot and that was tons of fun.
All this was putting a stress on our marriage. We decided to close the business and sell the equipment - recovering ten cents on a dollar of our hard earned - investments.
* * *
My "normal" job after closing our business felt easy. All I had to do was to show up and put in a good eight hour shift - then I could leave and not worry about any employee not showing up for work. Even though my job after we close our deli/bakery was easy - I missed running my business for a long time - notwithstanding various headaches connected with running the enterprise.
I missed the "hum" of our big flour grinder - "Big Daddy" - a magnificent Swiss design - Samap - which was electric but had stone blades which ensured great flour for our products - not overheated, old and dead - like most flours. Our kind of flour made our products look and taste - fantastic. In addition - they were satisfying even though we used healthy and not greasy - ingredients. Anybody can make a good cookie if they put tons of butter in it. Moreover - grinding our own flour gave our deli/bakery a terrific smell - better than the scent of bread being baked.
* * *
A year after Jack and I closed our deli/bakery - I went by there to see who opened some other business in our re-modeled professional looking space - which Jack and I paid to the contractors to equip with a costly - "hood" on the roof of that building - thus making it suitable for the restaurant or a bakery. The location became hot, hot, hot - in the middle of a - suddenly fashionable - neighborhood into which - all kinds of Chicago's construction companies - started to pour money like crazy since it was favorably zoned for the businesses and the apartments.
When I got closer to our ex-business - I noticed that the store front retained our old street number - prominently displayed in front - even though it underwent a lot of expansion inside. It was a restaurant now and since it was lunch time I walked in to look around. It was not overly busy yet - with a crowd of "yuppies" expected any minute.
"Hello," greeted me the middle aged, new owner. After I told him who I was he started to treat me like some kind of newly discovered - friendly and rich - relative. He suggested that I come back the next morning since he expected his lunch crowd to descend on the place any time. I couldn't wait till the next morning to talk to him - again. In the meantime - I entertained many thoughts of the regretful nature. I should have stuck to my "guns" and open a restaurant like this new owner. Now - he is "sitting on the goldmine" while I am out - looking inside.
When I showed up the next morning - the new owner told me that he "knew" my products when I had this commercial space so he suggested that I go into business with him and open my bakery in that space - "to enhance" his restaurant experience. The only minor thing would be that he expected me to invest - at least - half a million dollars - "to do it right" as he said. He also told me that when he bought and remodeled that building a year before - he had to invest close to a million dollars (he probably exaggerated a lot - wanting to impress me) - and he didn't know that this neighborhood will suddenly become the top "she-she-poo-poo" - fashionable part of Chicago.
I told Jack later that afternoon that we have made a big mistake by getting rid of our business. The neighborhood - in the meantime - came up, developed like crazy.
"Come on", said Jack and I could sense that he was thinking about some other things - like that he was never really interested in our business.
"Those youngsters down there - are a fickle bunch - you know how they will buy your products a few times - then they will find some other products they like more."
"All those new restaurants on that street are doing a booming business. If your product is good - there are always plenty of customers."
"I am not a restaurateur - I am not interested in any food businesses."
"You are always - mainly - interested in yourself".
"You should talk. 'A cattle called a pot' - black'".
His voice and demeanor came off in a sharp and distant manner - more than usually - in the last few months. His job situation changed and it caused an unexpected change in his personality - in spite of the fact that he was able to start his own business - producing and distributing his own videos for his numerous client base. Jack's new partner turned out to be honest, hardworking and effective. Jack - however - missed working in the news department - the way he did for the last ten years.
* * *
My older brother Max went through a stage when he constantly "proclaimed" that time will "grind" on all the couples - even the ones - madly in love. I started to believe it only when Jack and I came to the crossroads - "fork" - in our lives and we decided to "part our ways" after twenty years of - mostly happy - marriage. He would move out of Chicago which he always wanted to do - anyway - so he could take over our brand new townhouse in New York City area - while I would stay in Chicago in our remodeled townhouse which - in the meantime - came up in value. I was thinking of selling it while the market was favorable so I could move to hilly Pittsburgh and start me a "new life". My older brother Max and his family have always lived in Pittsburgh's - mountainous Squirrel Hill - where they owned a mini-mansion style - three unit dwelling. After Max divorced his second wife - he fully converted the two extra units - for rentals while he started to occupy the biggest apartment on the second floor. Even though - Squirrel Hill has always been the desirable place to own property - still - he has had an interesting "collection" of various types renting from him.
* * *
A super good summer of 2019 just ended - mainly because it was not overly hot. The gorgeous fall came quickly with the scent of fallen leaves in the air - at least two weeks before the Labor Day weekend. I have always liked the Labor Day since it means the all the kids are back in school - thank God.
When I lived in Chicago area - I liked to spend time in the nicely designed, park-like, Skokie mall - Old Orchard - which is gloriously decorated with plants, statutes and it lavishly changes the décor every season. However - during the summers the mall is always richly "infested" with tons of various, rowdy behaving little kids - all summer long - thus the Labor Day weekend - means - the return to normal, lovely Old Orchard - routine - until the following summer during which the kids will descend upon it - again.
* * *
The summer 2019 was a lot of fun but the fall - my favorite season - promises to be really good. I have always been interested in politics so I know that the elections of 2020 will be monumentally important for the future of the U.S.; the American Progressives/Socialists gained some traction in the Democratic Party - especially in view of the fact that - currently - in the halls of the U.S. Congress - "The Squad" - four Radical Socialists young ladies - the new congressional representatives from the Blue/Democratic states - appear to have "hijacked" the Democratic Party - for a while - anyway. Still - it's disgusting and stinks on ice. Come on - Leader Pelosi and other "normal" Democrats - it's about time to - finally - do something effective about "The Squad". Shame on you for "buckling under" to those four Radical Socialists!
I have made a promise to myself and God that I shall spread the word to anybody who will listen regarding the true nature of Socialism - under which I lived for many years; so I know "first hand" how this system is thoroughly disgusting, corrupting and just like cancer - destroys even the rich countries - like Venezuela and many, many others. If - God forbid - the U.S. would ever become a true Socialist country on the likes of China - China would appear like a proverbial "Sunday School" - comparing to how the U.S. would surpass China - in terms of being efficiently - repressive.
* * *
So far - the fall of 2019 promises to be great - the leaves are turning early - the temps are cool and sunny days plus cool mornings feel good. I like to pin a good size broach/American flag to my jean jackets which the various people who pass me in mostly blue/rich Democrat dominated - Squirrel Hill - immediately notice. Quite a few neighbors have American flags displayed in their yards and attached to their homes.
Sometimes the local Dems/Libs make various faces of "displeasure" upon - immediately - noticing a small, tastefully designed pin of American flag/broach - attached to my jean jackets. However - quite a few people give me a friendly smile - as well. It's a different kind of smile which I noted during this - coming soon, turbulent election season of 2020. Its the kind of smile that says something like - "I know that what you're doing is courageous - but - maybe - I will try it - soon - myself". I try not to be too happy about either approval as well as I don't feel bad about the occasional expressions of dislike - and even sometimes hatred - briefly appearing in their eyes - which disappears quickly - as well - "chased away" by my confident glance.
It's exciting and fun to "bone up" on many talking points which make the current Democratic presidential candidates exposed as Left leaning Socialistic Radicals wanting to "transform" this country - according to an ex-president Obama - thus making the federal government into a Divine ruler which the Radical/Dems/Socialists would direct - in order to control and suppress their opposition and people - below them - in general - so their power would be assured. Ayn Rand - a famous independent thinker and world-renowned - writer - called this strategy - "Collectivism" - the enemy of free mankind.
* * *
I consider Ayn Rand's American novels - "Fountainhead" and "Atlas Shrugged" - lasting masterpieces which are always accurately dealing with various, important aspects of the human condition. Even though she was widely vilified and severely criticized by many Leftists/Marxists and their adherents - her truthful observations withstand a test of time.
The movies based on her novels are also excellent plus several good pictures about her life capture her ideas regarding mankind - at times - "enslaved"- for a while - by oppressive economical systems like Socialism and his twin brother - Communism. I also read some exciting biographies dealing with her interesting and turbulent - life and loves.
In a nutshell - Ayn Rand barely escaped Russian Revolution as a teenager thus she witnessed first hand what a disaster Socialism has immediately become - to a rich country - like Tsarist Russia. Being interesting looking but not overly physically beautiful - still - she almost immediately - found work in Hollywood "behind the cameras" - as a script editor - upon her graduation Magna Cum Lade from the American university.
During her work on the set of the movie - she met and fell in love with an exceptionally handsome young actor who became a painter in his later years. They immediately got married and he became her life long husband. However - later in life - during her active work as an editor of her world famous journal - she fell madly in love with a much younger man - Jonathan Brandon who worked for her publications - read and distributed all over U.S. and abroad.
They became lovers for several years while her husband - allegedly - "gave her a permission" to carry on - since she didn't want to divorce him. At least - they were brave enough not to "sneak around" - with all the gossip columnists' collective tongues - hanging out - to print dirt about her and her lover. She was already world famous - celebrated writer - so she knew - first hand - all the trappings which come with global fame.
Long story - short - after several years - Jonathan cheated on her at first - then married his young lover. Ayn Rand was devastated for a while - then she found this experience - a source of deep reflections regarding the nature of love, betrayal, pain and recovery.
Chapter 80
Since I have always been interested in the U.S. and the global politics - I have been listening to various radio and TV commentators/TV and radio - talk show hosts. My favorite one - currently - being - Mark Levine who just published his latest non-fiction book - "The Unfreedom of the Press". His well documented examples of the current excerpts - published recently in the U.S. press plus the biased TV comments - effectively prove his case against the American Main Stream Media - accusing it of being a big propaganda tool for the American Democratic party - with its current agenda strongly leaning towards Radical/Socialist - legislative platforms - massively opposed by the majority of the American people.
I find Mark Levine extremely engaging during the three hours of his nightly radio talk show - especially when some nights he gets crazy callers/Liberals trying to deny his logical/legal arguments. I love how he takes them "apart". The only small "pet peeve" I have with Mark Levine nightly presentations is that - at times - he gets highly excited which make him raise his voice quite a bit. However - his various nicknames for many liberal Socialist leaning radio celebrities plus many pseudo-journalists/Lefties - are hilarious and always - on target.
Last year - 2018 - I used to listen to Michael Medved radio talk show - a lot. While he is extremely erudite and interesting to listen to - this year's sudden radio talk show star - Sebastian Gorka - who replaced him in this time slot - is exciting, involving and enormously - knowledgeable - about not only the U.S. politics, economics, current trends - but also about the global politics - as well. Michael Medved is also knowledgeable and delivers in an excellent manner - however - Dr. Gorka's "fire and emotional load" combined with his expert delivery - has a few equals among today's radio - "talkers". I could listen to him - forever.
Larry Elder has - also - had his - enormously successful radio talk show for many years - with his wacky, clever, funny and knowledgeable - daily, 3-hour long radio presentations steadily counting many millions listeners - kept mesmerized. I always like Fridays when his older brother Kirk - shares the mike with Larry. While Kirk is not a professional "talker" - he has a nice voice and his "street-smart" comments appeal to the listeners.
A lot of the listeners felt as if they called Larry and stayed with him for a while when they heard Kirk every Friday while Kirk was with Larry. Last Friday - I was crying. Mark a "talker" who subs for Larry some days - announced that we lost Kirk - on Fri. 13 - Sept. 2019. It was totally unexpected so Larry was away - of course. The whole three hours on that day - the listeners called and shared with Mark and the rest of the nation - their grief about loosing Kirk and how they will miss his voice - every Friday.
* * *
Since I have lived in this area of hilly Pittsburgh - twenty years - on and off - I have gotten to know some types who "circulate" here - in my part of town. Some come and go - some new ones - appear and disappear while quite a few - just take a bus and come to work here or simply "hang out" since this area has a really enticing and international - climate which attracts people.
There are a few steady types who never leave this area with some of them - usually behaving in an idiotic, loud, pushy and obnoxious manner which - naturally - gets on my nerves and on many other people's nerves - I am sure. If I don't see them on any given day - I consider it an extra nice day - so that day gets an extra "check" in my "be positive about various 'village idiots.'" - daily column.
I know for a fact that the most irritating individual has to be an older guy - loud, pushy, nasty and "screaming" for attention. He dresses like an idiot and - I can tell if I see him on the street - while I pretend to talk on the phone - to avoid giving him the second look - that he didn't take his medication on that day. I would never want to hurt him in any manner - but I don't need to associate with him - either - I am not a politician or a clergy person of any sort.
Another steady type which I prefer not to pass on the street - is a poor, fat old man - crawling around slowly with a walker. He looks unkempt and senile as he freely "breaks the wind" - not aware that people can hear him. I am sure that he is poor since he is always alone while if he was rich - there would be lots of "vultures" of every kind - surrounding him and tactfully waiting to put their "paws" on their inheritance.
* * *
My older brother Max and I have - finally - "straightened out" most of our old conflicts stemming from the fact that my biological father was Max's - stepfather. Naturally - he frequently felt that I was always treated better which was - usually - not true at all. He is ten years older than me - so for a long time - he had all kinds of "advantages" when we were kids. However - as we got older - things between us got reversed quite a bit - the balance of "power" got even out.
Even though - as Max gets older - his personality undergoes some positive changes - still - he has a big "Napoleonic" complex - he is a big "number one" to himself and to most people around him. He is honest and fair - most of the time - as is the rest of my family - still - I keep a little distance from them - including Max.
Sometimes I ponder about his perception of himself as I see him walking round this popular area of Pittsburgh as if he owns the place. He must look in the mirror to check upon his attire but evidently he sees nothing funny about wearing his sport socks very high combined with his Bermuda shorts - the combination which looks ridiculous. Our father used to do the same thing when he got old and he - stubbornly - ignored us when we pointed it out to him. Dad was a "bullheaded" old man and Max is getting more and more like him as he gets older. That's probably true about most men getting older - not that the older women are much different in that respect.
* * *
It's a very hot day - the last one of this summer - before the fall 2019 - officially begins. I am always glad when the summer is gone - for a lot of reasons but today - I was thinking about many beautiful summer days when the summer is still not getting bothersome. The classic Irwin Berlin tune - "Blue Skies" always reminds me of the lovely summer days which could last forever - not hot and humid - with the slight breeze in the air.
Even though I have always loved this song and heard many interpretations of it - with some of them - goofy and stupid - the best take on it which appeals to me the most - is the one by Willie Nelson - a talented vocalist, instrumentalist and song writer. His song "Crazy" which made Patsy Cline an international sensation - is also one of my most favorite ones; I never get tired of hearing it. However - when I listen to Willie Nelson - I prefer not to look at his face. Willie Nelson has had that "harsh", "hard living - galore" - look for many years now.
* * *
I am looking forward to each fall since I love the smell of falling leaves in the air - promising a beautiful Thanksgiving and winter holidays' season. Last autumn was sad in our pretty Squirrel Hill part of Pittsburgh - since a satanic maniac suddenly walked into a nicely designed Jewish temple during the Saturday, fall service - and shot dead eleven worshippers. We live in a dangerous world in which "the devil like - beings" - cause all kinds of carnage - but this world is also full of God's - heroes. I will never forget the first responders running into a "shower" of bullets to save people's lives.
I remember when I lived in Chicago and my ex-husband - Jack worked as a cameramen in the news department of a big Chicago TV station - they had a female reporter there who always loved to report on crimes - so her co-workers generously gave her all kinds of gruesome nicknames - behind her back. However - after a few years of doing that - she underwent a drastic "positive metamorphoses" - lost weight and wrote a successful non-fiction book on "how to turn your life into a positive experience."
This fall of 2019 - promises to be extra defining and good and it's almost here. Every year - it goes entirely too fast - however this one might a bit. I heard the commentator on the radio this morning stating that the U.S. House of Representatives will vote to impeach President Trump - right before the Thanksgiving. The Dems are losing - big time - so they are desperate to the max. They will still loose massively - 2020 Presidential elections.
Normally the winter holidays following the fall are a lot of fun - as well - until February of each year. That shortest month of the year - "never ends" even if it's a shortest month of the year. I vividly recall one hellishly hot summer followed by a glorious fall - quite a few years back. That summer started "normal" but as the season progressed - it became unusually hot, humid and bothersome to the max. It seemed that it would never end - even the people who normally like the hot summers - had that one - "coming out of their nostrils". When the fall of that year - finally arrived - it felt like a real paradise.
* * *
Since the summer has always been my least favorite season - my trips to Israel were always planned to avoid their summers which are enormously hot while the rest of the seasons in Israel - are lovely like the country - itself. It has a lot of problems - for sure - but so does every country on the face of this Earth.
I can't explain the deep love and connection I have always felt for Israel - ever since I can remember. I am certain that it has to do with my father always talking about it with love and affection bordering on idolatry. I have been trying to learn Hebrew which I find enormously - difficult. I do know that when the time is right - some important stuff starts happening in my life as if - the events have their own course to follow - no matter what I will decide. I am certain that it has to do a lot with Israel.
* * *
During that memorable, early spring visit in Israel - my second one - my sister and I visited her lawyer - an older lady who has the office in Jerusalem - thus we travelled from Haifa - where my Israeli family has always lived - to Jerusalem - on a fast train. We tried to establish our potential legal claim for some compensation which was still paid out by the German government - to the victims of Holocaust or their immediate - descendants .
When we stopped to get some documents at the Yad Vashem Holocaust Center - the clerk who issued them quickly - has informed us - even though we didn't ask for that piece of his "knowledge" - that several relatives have already requested those documents. My sister - who always has an answer to various kinds of idiots - made a comment in her almost flawless - Hebrew which "got where it needed" - judging by the expression on the clerk's face. We both laughed - even though I didn't understand her exactly - I knew that what she said - needed to be said.
* * *
I will never forget the morning when I landed in Israel's - LOD - airport for the second time - about a year after my first trip there. The flight on El-Al was good - as always - but after I landed - my sister and her family expected me at the airport in front of their tan colored Mercedes. They looked like a bunch of movie stars - smiling and glamorous.
She and I talked a lot many evenings about my goals for the immediate and a bit distant - future since I started my "new life" without Jack in the middle of my life. I felt that I had a purpose and a goal - leading me ahead - which were strongly connected with Israel so for the next few years which were hard - but not really, really hard - thank God - everything that happened to me was filtered through the prism of my Israeli destiny.
* * *
The years went by - some were better than others during which I have moved back and forth - from Pittsburgh's Squirrel Hill back to Chicago - several times - looking for something - I am not sure exactly - what. The last time I moved back to Pittsburgh - from Chicago - a couple of years ago - I became convinced that the Democrats running this - once beautiful Chicago - are not doing a good job at all; I am being extremely generous to the key power players of Chicago.
Long story - short - I have been in Pittsburgh's Squirrel Hill for the last couple of years and Chicago became the least priority for me to think about - even if at one time - the city was important to me. I can easily compare how - for now - Pittsburgh manages its affairs as compared to a growing mess in Chicago while the state of California - run by the Democrats - especially its coastal cities are poorly dealing with their hard problems - stemming from the gross mismanagement of their resources.
Chapter 81
The last time I voted in presidential elections of 2016 - in Chicago - the voting places there - didn't even try to hide the fact that they already had "phony" ballots ready to "load" for Hillary Clinton but - God and higher destiny - had other plans. The next morning after the elections - I saw some misguided young women - crying over Ms. Clinton's loss. I heard a lot of people making comments to the effect of: "You would be crying hard if she got elected - she already sold this country down the river by selling uranium to Russia and other corrupt things the Clintons did - galore." All the corruptions always comes to the surface - unfortunately - sometimes - it takes a long time.
I have simplified my "new life" - which I started in Pittsburgh - recently - for the third time. Every day is a new adventure and I strongly appreciate each new day and new week. I made a strong promise to myself to do all I can - but some days - even a minor stuff - to make sure that the U.S. stays a constitutional republic because - currently - quite a lot of misguided youngsters seem to want Socialism. I know for a fact and after living under Socialism that it destroys and corrupts all the social orders and societies.
Pittsburgh's - Squirrel Hill is full of Democrats who - recently - got "hijacked" by their various factions of their hateful - Socialists/Globalists groups who openly advocate for "shredding of the constitution, grabbing political power, opening all the borders which would flood the U.S. with tons of illegals - thus the U.S. would cease to be a separate country"; they aim at a huge central government - so they can easily control the population - just like China does.
Anyway - I do certain things three times per week while twice a week - I have a different schedule. That way - I don't need to be seeing the same people too much. It's not that I don't like Squirrel Hill - it's a beautiful part of town - however - I have always believed in keeping my distance from a lot of people until I find out that they are solid and trustworthy - all the three of them in this city of a third of a million. I am just kidding - I have always believed that most people are honest, kind and decent.
On Mondays - Wednesdays and Fridays I like to stop in the mornings - for a coffee and a croissant at the totally "she-she-poo-poo", elegant, trendy and somewhat pretentious new French bakery. I like to chat with the sales people there about their pricey products which look good - no question about it - especially their sweets which have good looks but most of them don't taste nearly as good as they look. They don't have almost any selection of breads and buns. I had a bake shop in Chicago for several years while my ex-husband knew a lot about making superior breads which looked glorious as well - so - consequently - I am also familiar with all the trade secrets concerning making the best breads - on this side of "mighty Mississippi".
* * *
Yesterday - I saw for the second time - an hour and a half documentary which received numerous praises and awards - for excellence and most deservedly - so. I couldn't take my eyes of my TV screen - for the whole hour and a half while it was running - just like during the first time I saw it - six months earlier. I think they show it twice per year - to coincide with the two major Jewish holidays - the Passover and the Rosh Hashana (the Jewish New Year).
It consists of mostly - narration by Sam Willinger - an old man/first hand witness to Nazis' atrocities - interwoven by the gruesome, true documentary clips - relating how - the Germans progressed in their "killing techniques" of mainly the Jews but also the Gypsies, homosexuals and the opposition to their Nazi regime - during the Second World War. Evidently the truth - cuts like knife in butter - into various propaganda - lies - not matter how skillfully delivered by most powerful propaganda machines.
The ironic fragment of this documentary -has an explanation of his actions by the Nazis' - "unsung hero" - the main commander of Treblinka (one of their death camps) - Franz Stengl - nicknamed "White Death" by the prisoners. He explained that he committed all his atrocities at the direction of his higher command (flimsy excuse) - as he set in jail awaiting his sentence at the end of the War - but it caused him to feel - "sadness" - no kidding. The directing, improving and executing - the death, torture, imprisonment of a million innocent humans caused "sadness" in the main executioner. What a shame!
Yom Kippur is a Jewish holiday which emphasizes - renewal, forgiveness, continuation of life - thus this documentary ends with Sam Willinger's only daughter - helping him design a German embassy in Jerusalem. After the Second World War - once the German Socialists were beaten to the "pulp" - Germany turned around and did a world of good for Israel and other "wronged parties". It's a shame that millions of people had to die and suffer - first. China is currently doing their "Socialist" practices by killing their opposition to the government.
Sam Willinger's only daughter - Orit Willinger-Galati (Orit - the luminous one - Hebrew translation of her name) was born in Israel after he started his new life there - following his miraculous escape from the death camp; he was one of 19 escaping - out of a million imprisoned and executed there.
Orit Willinger-Galati became a prominent architect and helped Sam Willinger design a new German embassy in Jerusalem after he was asked to do it - by new German government. Thus the Yom Kippur's eternal tenants of repentance, forgiveness and renewal - are the universal truth. It's a shame that a lot of people have to die - first.
* * *
The elections coming up in 2020 will be defining and very important. The U.S. Democrats got "hijacked" by their Radical/Socialist/Globalist - factions and they want Socialism in the U.S. That's - mainly happening in three big U.S. coastal states - California, New York and in the middle of the U.S. - Illinois (Chicago) - with the rest of Illinois not that Democratic/Radical. Those areas are definitely - Blue/Democratic/Socialist. The rest of the country - finds Socialism - repulsive. Some states close to the Eastern/Coastal Democrats/Socialists/Radicals - are "bleeding" Blue/Democrat - a bit - like Pennsylvania.
I have always loved the fall season then the beginning of the winter is also nice - right through the New Year - every year. If the winter is harsh - like a lot of them - in Chicago - then by the end of February - people can't wait till the spring. At times - the spring has a lot of hot, bothersome summer days - which I have always - despised.
This fall of 2019 is shaping up to be most defining, important and fun. So far the leaves are not changing too much - yet - but soon - the colors will be super. It took me many years of living and experiencing various passages - to realize that nothing is "guaranteed" to last more than a certain time without changing. It - frequently - changes from good to even better. At times - however - the changes are harsh - but - frequently - the changes are for the best - in the long run. Good times - go fast - but bad times - don't have to linger - especially if people are doing the best they can - to get out of their hole.
* * *
I have always liked to be around fun and optimistic people - as much as possible but people come and go. As I cross various thresholds - I always look ahead and quickly open "the next door" since looking back and "crying over spilled milk" is not my style and is an enormous waste of time and energy.
I always wonder why the worst of times - frequently coincide with the best of times which - usually - follow. I remember one fall and winter quite a while ago when everything seemed to "fall in place" for mine and Jack's lives. His job situation became semi-permanent - if anything could really be permanent. He liked his job and looked forward to going to work every day. I liked our new condo while my job was also fun and easy. Things could not be better for both of us. If anybody told me then that Jack and I will be divorcing at some time in the future - I would never have expected that.
It's kind of good that God or whatever other force strongly influencing our lives - does not gives any advance "notifications" of the important events to come. The important happenings - normally - come - unexpected - "out of the blue".
I will never forget one autumn as long as I live. Everything was finally falling in place for me and Jack after he received a permanent position at his job which he loved - that it - chasing the currently happening news with his - first class, the latest Japanese model television camera. He worked for a top Chicago television station while the management seemed to appreciate his excellent work.
* * *
That memorable fall morning started out normally. I got dressed, had a light breakfast and drove my small "Jetta" to my routine appointment with a new gynecologist - highly recommended by a friend at work. While I needed a check up since I have not had one for several years - there was nothing wrong with me - or so I thought.
For the next segment of this exciting story - click here - every Monday, Wednesday and Friday!
No comments:
Post a Comment